richardbenson
Xfractor Card #351
Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,553
Location: Leave only a footprint behind
28 Dec 2007, 11:51 am
wsmac
Veteran
Joined: 31 Aug 2007
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,888
Location: Humboldt County California
28 Dec 2007, 1:02 pm
If you've got the guts to do it - she deserves an explanation as to why you're "divorcing" her - a letter might be good... less chance of an angry rebuttal interrupting you.
I've been down the same road as you, and forgiveness is very, very difficult. I'm still working on it....
I like this advice BlueMax.
Well said.
28 Dec 2007, 1:36 pm
Hello siuan
This is all very hurtful and painful for you. I've been there too - don't want to bore you with the gory details but I recognise the anguish (and the fear of any contact).
But please may I say something really important....?
I got the AS assessment late in life. Cutting a long story short, I never saw how my black/white, I'm right/you're wrong Aspie way-of-seeing-things actually contributed to our problems. I mean, absolutely, I was certain it was all them and not me. My ignorant perspectives really did make me see my mother as evil.
It was only when I got the diagnosis that I finally saw how my mother had tried her best (and also that she is on the spectrum too).
Most parents really do do their best you know. 
Please don't shut the door so tight that you can never rebuild the link, please don't close your heart to her.
