Empathy

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Waitafreakingdutchmidgetwearingaminiskirtminnit, MissPickwickian. You're suggesting that to have no empathy makes you evil? No. Sorry, no cigar - sure as hell no damn cuban. Empathy means, essentially, thinking and feeling in the same manner as another by their perspective - putting yourself in their shoes. I find difficulty in this, and don't do it and don't care. That doesn't make me evil. That doesn't make others like me evil. I am evil. But, that's because I have a goal in my life, and I will do anything - anything - to accomplish it. My intentional disregard for others makes me evil. Something beyond my control? No, I don't think so. Remember; some people with Aspergers have no capacity for empathy, even if they try to. Does that mean they're evil? Well, that's up to them.

I have no problems showing empathy, and I wish that the "Experts" would stop saying, that we do.

Well I still feel I have no empathy and I've just proven to myself logical reasons to care for others instead of actually feeling inside that I care, empathy meaning I feel others pain, when another is hurting I don't ten dto feel it if they just tell me about it or share it. However if they share that feeling to me through some sort of expression, music or art, I can feel it so deeply it can touch me deep inside.

Maybe its not showing it thats the problem, maybe a lot of us simply have to learn where our empathy lies.

I've spent my life trying to feel, and everytime I do I'm overwhelmed with feeling, for me its either one extreme or the other, maybe it is just me though.

All this is academic. You are what you choose to be, within bounds of your own capabilities.
I'm a heartless bastard because that's what I'm good at and that's the only thing I can be.
If I tried to preten that I do, or could care, that would simply be a lie. We are what we are.
There shouldn't be any question as to whether or not innate capabilites for emotion should determine conscious choice as to what to do about your life. It's easy.

I don't know the bounds of my own capabilities! Thats why I practice every day its starting to get to the point where I'm creating things beyond what I even thought possible. I can't and won't lie so no pretending to care for me, instead I feel I've learnt the hardest lesson of all, for me at least. To be able to respect the things I have no care for, to even be able to respect things I find revolting. Because I have to live with others, if those around me are most concerned with material gain, who am I to say its worthless?

You're right it is easy, its always been easy for me to know what to do, the hard part for me was always how the hell I'm supposed to do it, meaning I could survive that would be simple, but to actually achieve something I consider worthwhile I'm not even halfway there yet.

My ability to feel continues to grow and change, as I have conciously chosen to take the harder but more rewarding path, there has to be an element of will involved right?

Or maybe I'm just deluding myself, I don't really care either way, I'm getting my recording equipment this weekend!

Well enough said, Scintillate. If your decision is to attempt to explore the limits of your ability in emotional terms, so be it - that it is you who have made the decision is what matters.
Myself, I find it works to my advantage to be as I am. I tried. I discovered I can't be more than I am empathatcially, and so I will try no longer. Let others try to understand me, as opposed to the reverse. But, for you, if you wish to try and have more, I really wouldn't know how to express this, "full" relationships with other people, well, good.

I seem to find it easy to express such emotion with my guitar, and to feel it through music to levels I've never felt with or through another person. I feel me pushing is me being what I am, I've always felt like a bit of a monster inside, I want to know everything, devour everything, touch everything!

You're right though we could spend our whole lives fighting for understanding or we could just be ourselves and see where that goes.

I think the only real relationships I have are with musicians