Are you glad about the time you found out about AS?

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Hi 9CatMom,

I don't understand; why are you glad about getting through school before AS was recognized?

Is there a stigma associated with AS that would have prevented your accomplishments at this time?

How well-known is "AS", anyway? Oh nm, I'll ask that in a different post.

Thanks.

AMEN, Jennyfoo!

I didn't find out till I was almost 60, and now I have to push myself rather than limit myself because I 'have this condition'. I am both happy I know now and sad my parents didn't ever understand what the heck was going on with me. I would have liked to know as a child so my parents could have stopped blaming theirselves (and me).

Merle

Perhaps you can refer to my post "Autistics shouldn't hurt each other." in this forum (General Discussion)
If you want to say something, say it.
Be constructive.
Don't be hurtful, please.
Perhaps ... just maybe ... I could use a little bit of constructive support.

Here, why don't I take your personal post and jab you with it a little, just to hurt you some more in life, since we all know Autistics don't suffer enough at NT hands as it is, and we all need more hurt to learn our fkn lesson ... for once!

Thanks for teaching me a lesson.

I'm certain you can understand just how much I really need to be taught more lessons in my life. I need that as much as you probably do. That much ... to that huge and unprecedented extent. Neither of us, I'm sure, can be taught enough lessons ... and this, yes THIS here, is the right place for it.


I doubt I would view you as a loser, freak, or anything else. Well, not normally. It depends on how hurtful a person is, for me. You can hang out with hurtful people if you want; I've had enough of that, however. the more you hang out with hurtful people, and the more you are hurt, the more you might feel better getting a little jab in at others - like me, for example.

I don't enjoy the company of NT's, and never did. They are all hurtful, in the end.
No, we're going to be 'eccentric' or 'geeky' - which I guess is a popular one - and we aren't going to appear normal. We aren't normal (like NT's) so why, why, why???? are we supposed to try and be normal? Or appear normal?

If you find your partner hurtful ... why are you with them?

I am not going to deal with hurtful NT's anymore just so I won't be lonely. Being hurt makes me feel more lonely and isolated.

Why not try and accept who and what you are, instead of fighting it?
Autistics tend to be highly sensitive, creative, intelligent, compassionate, gifted - and all other kinds of wonderful - people.
They're not 'normal'; just like you - or me. So that all sounds pretty good to me; people who aren't normal.

It's draining, exhausting, and painful to maintain some fraudulent personality that you just don't have.
I did that through my 20's. I could barely crawl home at the end of the day.
Don't forget to laugh at the appropriate time, and make the laugh as convincingly normal as possible - even though nothing was funny at all ... but it was actually yet another example of humans having 'fun' at someone or something else's expense.
Which is not at all funny ... because; guess who's next on the human 'fun' agenda???
Yeah, you are.
So it isn't funny after all ... it's just more outright horrifying.

Yeah, I agree it's drainging to keep that up.

You probably didn't read all of my previous lengthy post.

I survived - most very well - and was very happy for 9 years in an artists' community.
I survived so well there that I didn't want to be left alone - I wanted to be around people a lot.
I survived so well that I left my studio doors open most of the time - even when I was sleeping - just so my friends could come in anyway. I used to wake up to people and friends enjoying themselves in my home. That was a beautiful feeling. I loved having visitors.

You'd have to read my previous post, though, to understand that I learned I didn't have to do what I did through the wasted years of my 20's, trying to appear NT and normal, but was able to be more and more myself and still be accepted.

Absolutely! Screw the NT planet.
Couldn't agree more.
Maybe you might take a look at my post "Autistics shouldn't hurt each other."

Thank-you for not smacking.

It's okay to refer to NTs as a group and AS as a separate group.
I don't think it's okay [not my personal opinion, just a general thing] to refer to NTs as the "humans" and AS as something... well, other than human.
You know, not that I'd actually mind not being human, but still.

hi Jeyradan,

"It's ok to ..."
1) Is this a fact, and would you bet everything you have on this fact? Would you bet everything you have - your everything, against my everything - that this is a fact???


Is this a fact, and if so, would you want to bet everything you have - against everything I have - on the fact that this is a fact?


But still ... what?

Let's see:
What is "human"?

Is is not the body; that is the body of an intelligent mammal called a 'homo-sapiens'.

It is not intelligence; that is the intelligence of an intelligent mammal called a ' homo-sapiens'.

So what, then is "human"?

Human, then is the intangible traits of the human mind, by which humans identify themselves as human.

Since our minds work differently, and since we have different intangible traits, then it is not in any way necessarily "bad", "wrong", "immoral", "cruel", "superior", "disciminating" ... or any other such emotionally-charged word-concept to use the term "human" and the term "Autistic", and to say;

"Autism is a different form of sentience than human."

Because you are Autistic, your mind works differently, you think differently, you have a different value-system, and you have different intangible traits than humans do.

Is there something else to the matter I didn't take into account?

So, if you wouldn't mind not being human (and *ick* look what they do and how they operate, so that sentiment is, to me, most very understandable), then you can look at the facts - instead of what 'should' be, or instead of a morality-set - and you can now officially celebrate the fact that you no longer have to mind being human.

Ta-Da!! !



Welcome to the Autistic species.

welllllllll although diagnosed at 10 didnt know till 12. when i found out i didnt know what AS was or anything. i had a limited knowledge.
Early on i wanted 2 be cured
NOW im glad for who i am
and never would want to be cured!
xxxxx

I was diagnosed at 19 years and am not happy about it being 18 years late.

All the missed out things, all the wasted time and all the misery of family could have just been prevented a great deal.

yeah i would hate if i didnt find out till then!! !! !
Well i was a bit pissed off actually because i wasnt told till almost two years after i was diagnosed!! !! !
i suppose i felt relived in a way, because once i found out what AS actualy was i realised why i was different
xxxxxxx

I'm eighteen and just realizing I might have AS, and I'm okay with the fact that I wasn't diagnosed early on. My parents are the kind of people that think "you can either do it all or nothing" and they might not have pushed me as much as they did, or might have even held me back. While things have been hard over the years, overall I am very pleased with the results thus far. I had no concrete reasons all my life to why things seemed so much harder and more frustrating for me, so I was forced to do things I'm sure I wouldn't have done if I had known. Things turned out fine, however, except for some notable bumps.

Having this knowledge now allows me to find ways to cope with some of my problems, which might become more pronounced as I become more independent.

Archetype is my new hero for standing up for himself and not letting stupid people tell him how to be and inspired me to finally post as I've been lurking here for a few weeks. I had similar trouble in school when I was just being my witty self. I agree with most of your post. But I wouldn't discard all NT's. A few of them are actually quite nice and accepting of differences. I unlike you would like to experience love to it's fullest more than just about anything even though I know I could never really play the game nor would I want to try to be something I'm not. Nor would I want them to have to "settle" for someone who can't reciprocate their feelings. It would take quite a special, understanding lady to achieve that goal.

On the topic I would say yes I'm definitely glad I recently self diagnosed after finding out a friend at work was also an Aspie and researching it and having all the alarms go off in my head that this is who I am. If I had know earlier it would have made things a lot easier saving myself many years of grief and depression over why I was different but never really understanding the anxiety and thinking there was something wrong with me. I now recognize in other highly intelligent and creative people throughout my life who would also fall under ASD. It's like finally waking up after almost 30 years. Since I can't get that time back I'll just make the best with what's left and embrace the artist I used to be before college and work got in the way killing my inspiration with the exhaustion and boredom of the workplace.

I'll finish by saying this is a great site. Many thanks to the creators and supporters.

I know why! Because what is worse than having a bunch of NTs blaming you for being different? It is a bunch of NTs limiting your opportunities because they read somewhere you can't do something because it is on a list that says so.

I was glad when I found out I had AS has I could finally put a name to why everything seemed so hard. I got depressed because I really started to believe I was really unintelligent and a failure at life. Also finding out also high lighted things that I was really good which I never relised before. I tell everyone I have AS it's has much of a gift has it is a cure.

I'd never hide the fact I have AS has that would be a insult to myself and every other Aspie out there.

was self-diagnosed at 49. So I've known since last year. But working in a competitive industry as a contractor, in a right-to-work state, you don't want to give anyone any excuse to fire you.

It'll have to just be my secret...

Of course I'm glad I found out. It explained so much. Social problems, obsessions, sensory issues... it's all here.

Of course, it did seem a little strange self-diagnosing myself with something that I, along with the rest of the class, would laugh at when a teacher said "aspergers" occasionally if the subject ever ventured in its direction.

the answer is no. when i found out my hope died because right then it hit me like a brick that the glass wall i have lived behind for almost 4 decades will never break. i will always feel like i'm outside looking in. the most that can happen now, if ever, is that i learn to not to hate it anymore, to learn how to "cope" and "manage" the state i'm in. that's some goal there. and don't even talk to me about the decades i've wasted trying to fix some other non-existent problem in the futile effort to breath a sigh of relief - something i now realize will never happen.

that's what i feel. when i bother to feel. mostly i'm shut down. some days i just choose not to feel because sometimes the disconnect is comforting.

what i think, however, is that it's only been a month and that i'm still in shock. or grieving though over what i'm not exactly sure. i don't know what comes next. it would be nice if something does come next because where i am today is worse than where i was.

Im 19 and I found out a few months ago online. I'd say that I'm glad a found out about this after school instead of a child. Because I always told myself growing up that I'll eventually get out of my shell and have friends when I get older. But Now that i've found out about aspergers i realise that my chances are slim and I was born to be this way. And I never wanted to to see myself as being different. I went to public schooling and had normal classes my whole life. Even a couple advanced classes.