BF doesn't want me diagnosed.

Post Reply New Topic

Screw him, do what you want. If you want to be diagnosed then do it.

'

it's not 'shame' is it? Some people are ashamed they are ashamed about it.

Merle

It's not your boyfriend's business if you get diagnosed. He sounds really controlling. Actually I would kick him to the curb. Get the diagnosis so it will clarify your life.

My guess is your boyfriend may also have Aspergers and that is why he is trying to stop you from getting the diagnosis as people may start to notice he is the same way. AS men are extremely controlling as boyfriends.

He's not controlling at all. The decision is entirely up to me. He knows that and agrees with it.
He's not stopping me, even though he doesn't think it's necessary. He's not making an issue out of it, I am. Because I love him, I don't like seeing him upset. He won't talk about it because he doesn't want to influence my decision. I don't need his permission, but I respect and value his opinion.

Despite a few aspy traits, I think he still has a NT brain. Just a nerdy one. His thinking is very different to mine.


We talked a little bit about it last night. He said the only label I need was a warning label: Caution - Hot!


I'd marry him if he didn't think marriage was pointless because it's not like anything changes once you've got that bit of paper...

Only you have any say on diagnosis.

I couldnt agree more with this.

Really? I just can't see myself that way. I do what I need to survive, and that is all, it is too much work to try to control another person. I could convince someone to jump out of a plane without a parachute if I really wanted to, but I don't like trying to play with fate. I only do what it takes to further my own existance, I just debating, and I will do what I can to protect those around me, but by protect, I mean actually protect, not like don't go do x because it is pointless. Although if you say PETA convinced you to be a vegetarian, I would probably send you nice home cooked steaks everyday to cleanse your mind of the brainwashing PETA had done. Now if you say you want to be a vegetarian because you believe you will benefit in some way, such as feeling good about yourself, or having a healthier lifestyle, all the power to you, and I hope you will be sucessful with it. I have no problem with what most people want to do, its the reasons they want to do it for that I may hate their decision because of.

Ah, but something does change, once you've stood up in front of the world and proclaimed your commitment. Just ask the gays in CA who are fighting to keep marriage an option.

And, I guess, this is the problem with getting a diagnosis. Once you've gone out and done that, it's in your file, it's part of your records. You've "married" the label.

It is possible that the permanence of the label and the unkowns of what it could mean to the both of you worries him.

Much like the idea of getting married does.

And, of course, he doesn't want to express any of that. Because it means that he is afraid things really do change, in situations where he insists they don't.

He doesn't want to risk messing up what is good right now.

Just a theory.