How do you cope in public?

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I always felt awkward being out among crowds, and just recently, I started wearing sunglasses and they help out so much! I don't get nearly as many looks of questioning, and actually more looks of appreciation from the opposite sex, meaning I can hold their gaze a lot longer.

It has been a lifelong struggle. I'm still working on it. I can do public speaking just fine, but I was at a concert a couple of weeks ago and had to step outside twice, in 20-minute bursts, because I felt (a) hideous/alone and (b) unable to process my environment.

The person who talked me into going to the concert, who has Asperger's, later told me that she figured that's how I would react but wanted me to have the opportunity to adapt to that sort of environment when I was in a safe place and around friends.

Sometimes, I kinda want to marry this girl.


Cheers,

TH

Coping with public situations can be quite notorious depending on the environment surronding myself.I am okay if it is quiet and limited crowd control
but in public areas especially during peak holiday seasons is very difficult to cope.I usually like to keep my head low if I find it too unconfortable to
perform my purpose in that environment.The best way to pacify my senses is to listen to something or say something in your head that has familiarity
to it.

I've actually been doing that recently at work. I bring an action figure into my booth which keeps me partially sane, and I also close my eyes and picture a life of wealth and success. For some reason, repeating Vincent Price's dialogue from Thriller also seems to help too.

Love your avatar, btw; Dr. Tran RULES.

same here!

Ditto

I feel the same way. I always feel least out of place/under scrutiny when I have a specific and immediate task. Strangely that even applies when the task is something that would actually make me even more likely to be the focus of people than I would be if I was doing nothing. For example, I once helped fill a skip (dumpster) with old construction materials that had recently been ripped out of an office building which was undergoing renovation, carrying each big heavy piece of junk down a busy high-street in the shopping district of a capital city, with hundreds of passers-by casually watching what I was doing as they walked down the street. Since I had an immediate task and a visible valid reason for being where I was, I did not feel as awkward or out of place as I would have done if I was walking down the same street with no instantly recognisable purpose for being there.

I generally don't go anywhere unless I have something to do, it just feels weird otherwise, and simply going from point A to point B doesn't really work as a purpose in itself, the goal is too distant and there's too much of a gap where nothing is being done, similar to an awkward silence. It's weird, but it's always more comfortable to have an immediate task, and to have the hands occupied in some way etc.

I tend to be very awkward in public, even if I am by myself walking down a crowded sidewalk. I feel not human enough to interact with people.

fine. unless i have an appointment, wich this sweetheart is always on time, always!

I'm good at acting. I try to be friendly and smile if people see me. I nod my head. I'm not talkative. If someone talks to me I say "Yes, that's right" or something agreeable.

I'm a lot more relaxed though when I get home and take off the mask.

I have not had a diagnosis, in part because I can act so well. How do people react to you when you're not wearing a mask? I'm curious. What would you say sets you apart from normal people? I've noticed that when no one's watching I tend to bob my head a lot, like I'm ducking under something.

I often keep noise stopper earphones on.

I definitely agree with this.

Yep, best answer here. Mind my own business and thinking ahead how will i pull this off without embarrasing myself (drawing too much attention). I also try to keep it cool no mather what and not worry too much if something does not go as planned.

I've never put on a mask in public. I've always been who I am & how I am & that has caused a lot of problems for me throughout my life. People don't like the fact that I'm so quiet, & tell me so, they don't like what I say when I do talk, & tell me so, they just plain don't like who I am as a person, & tell me so. But I'm not going to pretend to be anyone other than who I am for anyone.

here here!

and the best part is....you know that they'll never really like you anyway, since you're just being you.


It's a lesson many here fail to grasp; you're a smart one

I'm not afraid of people, but I feel really uncomfortable around them, especially around strangers. I do go out in public, but I try to avoid going to crowded places and I always try to stay away from other people when possible or concentrate on something else than them if I must be near them.

I do put up a mask, so to speak. I behave differently in public than at home, because people just aren't understanding or accepting of differences and I don't like being confronted, harassed or made fun of for being different or "weird" (as NTs see it), so I try to put up a mask to make my aspie traits less noticeable so that I don't attract unnecessary negative attention.