People telling you to snap out of depression, irritating?

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DW
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15 Aug 2010, 1:52 am

It's good to know that there are still people with compassion left in this world =)



capriwim
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15 Aug 2010, 7:35 am

Blasty wrote:
I have had pretty serious depression before, and being cooped up without sunlight (even if you don't like to go out) is more harmful than you might think.


To be fair, you're right - a lot of things are helpful, not to 'fix' depression, but to somehow manage it. I worked in mental health for a while, in a psychiatric home for people who were severely mentally ill and couldn't live independently. They couldn't be 'fixed', but there were things, like physical exercise, fresh air, good diet, etc., that all had a positive effect. So we were supposed to encourage these things but not enforce them. Of course the irony is that when someone is really depressed, the last thing they want to do is go out and exercise - especially if they have meds that make them lethargic. And if it's coupled with AS, then sensory sensitivity to light could make going out in the sun extra tricky.

I think maybe the thing people get annoyed with is when someone says cheerily 'Oh, just go for a walk and you'll feel much better!' when it's really not as simple as that. It's frustrating when friends see certain things as a quick fix, and can't understand how complicated something really is. And also often people know that certain things are a good idea, so they don't need to be reminded - their difficulty is that they can't bring themselves to do them.

I know this is true for myself with Aspergers in general - I have a lot of difficulty being organised and getting things done. I know what I should do, but somehow there is something stopping me and overwhelming me - and it's so frustrating when people say 'Just do it - it's simple! You're clearly being lazy and don't want to do it.'


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DW
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16 Aug 2010, 1:07 am

That's the one that irritates me, when someone says you are lazy because you are constantly lethargic as a symptom of depression. Or being called stupid because you check something repeatedly as a result of OCD.



Dnuos
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16 Aug 2010, 1:28 am

capriwim wrote:
Blasty wrote:
I have had pretty serious depression before, and being cooped up without sunlight (even if you don't like to go out) is more harmful than you might think.


To be fair, you're right - a lot of things are helpful, not to 'fix' depression, but to somehow manage it. I worked in mental health for a while, in a psychiatric home for people who were severely mentally ill and couldn't live independently. They couldn't be 'fixed', but there were things, like physical exercise, fresh air, good diet, etc., that all had a positive effect. So we were supposed to encourage these things but not enforce them. Of course the irony is that when someone is really depressed, the last thing they want to do is go out and exercise - especially if they have meds that make them lethargic. And if it's coupled with AS, then sensory sensitivity to light could make going out in the sun extra tricky.

I think maybe the thing people get annoyed with is when someone says cheerily 'Oh, just go for a walk and you'll feel much better!' when it's really not as simple as that. It's frustrating when friends see certain things as a quick fix, and can't understand how complicated something really is. And also often people know that certain things are a good idea, so they don't need to be reminded - their difficulty is that they can't bring themselves to do them.

I know this is true for myself with Aspergers in general - I have a lot of difficulty being organised and getting things done. I know what I should do, but somehow there is something stopping me and overwhelming me - and it's so frustrating when people say 'Just do it - it's simple! You're clearly being lazy and don't want to do it.'
That's what I keep thinking. It could be more difficult for someone with AS to recover from depression, because a lot of the things that would help someone recover from depression, like exercise or socialize, don't go well with AS in most cases.



DW
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16 Aug 2010, 2:04 am

Sunshine and exercise would not have much of an effect on any form of Real depression. When I say Real, I mean not like the kind of depression a teenage girl feels when she loses her boyfriend or something.. but an actual depression that has to do with one's genetic makeup, comorbidity such as with AS, schizophrenia, etc.

By the way, once again thanks everyone for commenting!



nara44
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16 Aug 2010, 2:12 am

DW wrote:
Sunshine and exercise would not have much of an effect on any form of Real depression. When I say Real, I mean not like the kind of depression a teenage girl feels when she loses her boyfriend or something.. but an actual depression that has to do with one's genetic makeup, comorbidity such as with AS, schizophrenia, etc.

By the way, once again thanks everyone for commenting!


This kind of depression can only be cured by true love and true love doesn't exist
at least not yet



DW
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16 Aug 2010, 2:16 am

That's a damn good answer =)



marshall
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16 Aug 2010, 4:02 am

DW wrote:
Sunshine and exercise would not have much of an effect on any form of Real depression. When I say Real, I mean not like the kind of depression a teenage girl feels when she loses her boyfriend or something.. but an actual depression that has to do with one's genetic makeup, comorbidity such as with AS, schizophrenia, etc.

By the way, once again thanks everyone for commenting!

I think a major hurdle for me with depression is that I'm too intelligent for my own good. I'm too skeptical. I don't buy into everything I hear. The power of suggestion isn't very strong with me. A lot of the advice people give, while it could theoretically be helpful, appears to me like they're suggesting I can put out a raging inferno with a small garden hose.

Yet, ironically it seems like the people who are more open to things working tend to recover more easily, but possibly not for the reasons they think. It's just that people who are wired to be open to suggestion can experience a feeling of hope more easily while those who are more realistic in their thinking and may be very critical and skeptical get more and more locked into depression.



DW
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16 Aug 2010, 4:13 am

Very interesting observation. I can see what you are trying to convey and it reminds me of one person... CNN's Jack Cafferty (if you watch CNN). He is a very realistic man who often seems 'cold' in nature and does suffer of depression due to his wife's death and I believe alcoholism in the past. He has always seemed depressed, and maybe that has to do with the fact that he doesn't really buy anything other than realism, and isn't afraid to make sure that people know that the majority of conspiracy theories are BS, etc. Maybe, this is why he is always moody, because he doesn't 'buy' anything.

I have to say that I am the same. I believe in science, truth and cold hard facts that can be backed up. I don't really follow any religion and tend to criticize people when they say 'Oh, follow the lord and all your problems will go away'... I don't believe in anything other than the existance of extra-terrestrials due to the fact that their existance is scientifically explainable (evolution, etc).



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16 Aug 2010, 5:21 am

DW wrote:
Sunshine and exercise would not have much of an effect on any form of Real depression.


I have suffered from depression, and was an inpatient for some time. In retrospect, I wish that exercise and sunshine had been a part of the treatment.

My grandmother treated "walking wounded" returning from the war, who consisted of a mixture of infectious disease and psychiatric conditions (depression, PTSD) that were either called malingering or shot nerves then. They all had to rise at 6 am and do a four-mile fast walk before breakfast. Every patient (these were soldiers, so the circumstances were very different) was responsible for making their own bed, cleaning and tidying their area and alerting the nurses to the needs of their bed-neighbours. They had exercise sessions and play (cards, singing, sketching) that aren't far off decent occupational therapy.

I think I would have benefited from the structure and the enforced exercise when I was at my most depressed, instead of being left in a bed in a secure psychiatric ward.



DW
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16 Aug 2010, 6:14 am

Well, maybe something of that calibre would have some effect on the human mind. Interesting story by the way. Maybe it had some success due to the fact that there was some routine to it, some order?

When I speak of sunlight, exercise, what I am trying to say (I should have been more specific by the way) is that when one is depressed, being told to go take a walk in the park for example really wouldn't have much of an effect. Perhaps it shows the depressed individual that the person who told them to take a walk in the park thinks that their condition is just silly, etc. This can be irritating as many people have confirmed.

I can't say that I disagree with you that perhaps inpatient psychiatric care was not the best option for the treatment of your depression. But I am assuming that you were in inpatient care because they deemed you a risk to yourself? If so, then you must remember that the psychiatric professionals don't know what you are thinking, and while you may think 'oh, this is not helping me and is pointless', they may think that you could try to harm yourself at any moment and just feel safer if you were around.

Perhaps Intense exercise and sunlight would have been of a benefit to you at that point in time, I don't know. There is an alternative treatment to SSRIs, CBT, etc. known as BLT or Bright Light Therapy (I think the name is ridiculous by the way) which is a light placed over your bed and shines your face early in the morning (not bright enough to wake you up though) that is thought to naturally increase the synthesis of serotonin in your brain resulting in a better mood. There are people who claim it works. Perhaps those people saw benefit because the BLT treatment is structured much the way your grandmother's regimen was structured? I don't know.

Nevertheless, I am trying to look at both sides here as you can see.
And thank you for your comment!



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16 Aug 2010, 4:00 pm

DW wrote:
I can't say that I disagree with you that perhaps inpatient psychiatric care was not the best option for the treatment of your depression. But I am assuming that you were in inpatient care because they deemed you a risk to yourself?


Certainly, risk was the issue. I have discussed my grandmother's stories (which are in turn hilarious, tragic and very touching) with modern nurses, and they can't see much place in modern care for the enforced routine and the outside exercise. The two biggest barriers are in "enforcing" routine without undermining the dignity of the patient, and the danger to staff and patients involved in exercise outside the confines of modern secure units. My local psych unit does not have any open air access at all, but does have an enclosed (fully glazed) balcony facing a glorious sunset view.

I think the whole issue of recovery from depression for people with autism is really interesting. There are autistic traits overlapping depressive symptoms, so recovery can only be assessed with a correct impression of the individual healthy state, not assessed against some population norm. We don't all smile, hug and seek contact with fellow patients - sitting in the quiet corner with no expression while contemplating the wonder of a sunset might actually be an individual happy state, not a sign that the SSRI dosage needs increasing. The difficulty of expressing an unpleasant emotion, perhaps in terms of voice or a perception of hurt caused by contact with other people is not necessarily psychosis.



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16 Aug 2010, 5:10 pm

marshall wrote:
DW wrote:
Sunshine and exercise would not have much of an effect on any form of Real depression. When I say Real, I mean not like the kind of depression a teenage girl feels when she loses her boyfriend or something.. but an actual depression that has to do with one's genetic makeup, comorbidity such as with AS, schizophrenia, etc.

By the way, once again thanks everyone for commenting!

I think a major hurdle for me with depression is that I'm too intelligent for my own good. I'm too skeptical. I don't buy into everything I hear. The power of suggestion isn't very strong with me. A lot of the advice people give, while it could theoretically be helpful, appears to me like they're suggesting I can put out a raging inferno with a small garden hose.

Yet, ironically it seems like the people who are more open to things working tend to recover more easily, but possibly not for the reasons they think. It's just that people who are wired to be open to suggestion can experience a feeling of hope more easily while those who are more realistic in their thinking and may be very critical and skeptical get more and more locked into depression.


hear, hear to that Marshall


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clumsybee
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16 Aug 2010, 7:21 pm

I can definitely relate, but I've gotten this for dealing with fibromyalgia as well. People just dismiss the pain and assume it's just mild depression and sun solves everything... and it's super frustrating when you hear this from doctors. :?



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17 Aug 2010, 12:17 am

it is irritating to get those
"snap out of it" type remarks.
you know they mean well but at the same time you want to go all Eric Cartman and say
" I would if I could you SOB"



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17 Aug 2010, 12:20 am

It is frustrating and for people to say that only i can get out of it. i am in no shape mentally to do anything let alone something requiring that much effort.