1) When I was younger, my problem was spacing out. I would stare at one spot and just go into some bubble zone where I didn't hear what was going on around me.
My teacher used to make jokes about it--once, she cut out a paper crown, put it on my head, and called me the Queen of La-La land. Fortunately, I've always been optimistic to an unreasonable point, so I just thought it was nice of her to put a crown on me.
I suspect it also had to do with my mom being a British immigrant in the US--because the teacher used to always ask me "how was tea with the Queen?" and she was a very patriotic American.
2) Then, later, it became the bullying. I didn't fit in, and it was becoming increasingly apparent in middle school. There was a group of boys that seemed to have one or two members in every class. They sexually harassed me by whispering crude, explicit sexual things in my ears, putting their arms around me, and laying on top of my desk until I agreed to give them a fake phone number. I am still disappointed with the teachers for not reacting.
One threw twenty tape wads in my hair during class, which was too thick and long for me to notice right away. None of the kids said anything--even though the ones behind would obviously have been watching.
I actually started ditching class in middle school, to avoid seeing them. I would go into the bathroom and sit there, alone, for the class. Sometimes crying and sometimes drawing. Then I started getting mysterious stomach aches before catching the bus in the morning--and missing the bus and staying home with a stomach ache.
NOW, I went back to college and I loved it. Being an adult is much better. I carry pepper spray on me and have more rights. If a man were to try to whisper sexually explicit things in my ears--or put his arm around me--or refuse to leave me alone unless I gave him my number--he would get his facial orifices filled with pepper spray. It gets better, even in college.
04 Jul 2012, 1:14 pm
