Why do NTs always have the upper hand in this case?

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I do hate putting NTs down, so I am only generalizing when using this thread. I just hate it when I give out examples and other Aspies say ''oh maybe you were doing something wrong'', even though I have used exactly the same scenario but just switched the names round.

It'd be better if people were more aware that an Aspie may have problems with social interaction, but still doesn't always mean the Aspie is in the wrong. Aspies deserve dignity too. It's like having a 3-week-old baby and a 4-year-old child in a room, and seeing a drink spilled on the carpet, and blaming the tiny baby, just because the tiny baby is weaker and obviously less able to reason than the child.

This. It's important to learn to fight fair. There are rules, and it's easy to get emotional about the argument and forget the rules. Try to not be the first to raise your voice, don't attack the person, only the ideas. For starters.

I know it's a rethorical question but I'll let my AS take the better of me
If a friend stabbed someone out of the blue, he better have a damn good reason . But I don't think any of my friends are of the kind who stab people just because. Or punch, for that matter. If I saw a friend punching someone else, I'd just feel really uncomfortable and probably not do anything, especially if I don't have any kind of strong ties with the other guy. It's just not something I should interfere with. If the guy hit back, I wouldn't interfere either, because my friend would have brought that upon himself. And maybe he deserved it, who knows, I'd ask him later. And I admit to a double standard, because if it was someone else punching my friend first, I'd probably shove him away and take appropiate measures in the case of escalation.

On other topics, first I'd like to say that not all NT's are the same,and we should really avoid generalizing when talking about them. I'm sure there are honest and principled people in the world who do the right thing and admit to their mistakes even when it hurts them, and if someone doesn't, well, that doesn't make him evil anyway.

Moondust seems to have a very developed view on that topic, I agree with what she said. And yeah, I've fallen for what Mummy of Peanut said, and nowadays I only play Devil's advocate when among people I care about. Those who know me value my honesty, and I know better than contradict the general consensus among people who don't.

Life can be like a little game of thrones, sometimes

By virtue of your disability, people will try to convince you that you are wrong.

I'm of the belief that the vast majority of people do not believe Autists are capable of the kind of introspection that happens on wrongplanet.

Autistics being astutely aware of how society views them and how others treat them, goes against a number of theories surrounding Autism.


TheSunAlsoRises

Did you ever consider that the intellect, attention to detail and particular style of insightfulness an Aspie has, makes the NTs feel insecure? They might be thinking "why didn't I think of that" or "he's showing me up to look thick" etc. and their own insecurities make them go on the attack. You must have heard of the saying 'attack is the best form of defence'. No-one likes to be made to look like the clueless one, so maybe by you stating your point, they argue back and gang up because that point didn't even occur to them, they bluster their way through to hide the fact that they don't have a good answer. And there's always pack mentality, where they will follow like sheep and put down the one who had a different (but right) answer, because the only way they can make themselves feel good is by 'destroying' the outspoken one who has the right answer. It's a bit like how they try to discredit whistleblowers.

It's always good to try to self-analyse that you are not coming across as offensive of course. But I know the feeling that when you absolutely know 100% that you are right, and people won't listen, and you can't do anything but argue because you really have to get them to see your point.

And another thing is, there is also the possibility that an NT, who is by nature more able to be wily, crafty and manipulative than an Aspie, might speak their side of the argument in a deliberately quiet and underhand way, seeing it is making the Aspie more and more anxious to put across the correct facts, and they do it for that reason. To wind up the Aspie to get 'out of control' as they are aware that people are more likely to switch off to the Aspie because of their emotional state, and side with them, the NT. Classic manipulation. I think NT children learn this sort of behaviour from a young age.

Yes, but you aren't an NT. That's exactly the point.

I regret I missed this thread a couple of months ago. This is spot on, well said.



This also seems to be some of the most sound advice for dealing with NTs and most accurate description of their thought process. While it sucks having to live in a world dominated by them, how can we, in good conscious, ever aspire to be like them? When you've seen the light, how can you turn back to the darkness?

It's the same way Obama lost the debate against Romney: Content matters little. It's all about delivery. Work on things like body language, the tone of your voice, pace, etc. Don't get me wrong, I wish the world was more advanced, but it is what it is.

Thats well described and so I can imagine myself in that situation.
The woman was technically correct, but putting all the factors in context in practical terms this would not happen for a number of reasons that most people would understand, which pertain to normal human behaviour.
So she would have come across to the others as dramatic, perhaps naive or lacking sound judgement.