The Dark Aspie

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An aspie with an attitude?

NO WAY!

Can't imagine such a thing.

Last edited by naturalplastic on 31 Oct 2013, 10:01 am, edited 1 time in total.

Sometimes I scare myself. To wit:

When I was in my teens, I was so against religion that I harbored the idea of burning churches to the ground. This idea stayed with me for a few years but eventually I let it go.

Years later, when I was fired from a job I actually liked, I fantasized about what I would do with a samurai sword. For months I studied all the different designs on the internet but never bought one.

I guess I turned all that anger inward and became a homeless, alcoholic drug addict.

One problem though: Trying to be friendly to people, only to have them interpret some of your other behaviors as being unfriednly:

Reluctance to make eye contact

Recoiling from touch

These make it more difficult to be seen as friendly

I was thinking along the lines of Ted Kozinski (the unabomber)- someone who wants to blow the whole world up.

But the GWTDT is certainly dark, and she is aspie-like. She only does violence to those who mess with her (not to the whole world), so its a little different than what I understand what the OP is looking for. But yes in a differnt way she is 'a dark aspie".

I get that a lot.

Sometimes it's hard to think "Why not?" Most of them would take a hatred to me just by looking at me. Most of them want me dead. Would it be so wrong? They've tormented me all my life. I'm not very strong, but I'm persistent, and smarter than most.

Luckily, the law exists to stop me. I'll be honest, that's the biggest obstacle I have. Sometimes I'm ashamed that I search myself for some moral reason to not hurt people, but considering what they do to me, it all seems fair game. I can't even say I feel like something would be lost, to be honest. My enemies are not the usual NT. Most NTs are neutral at worst. These people are offended by the very idea of anything that differs from the norm, and they in themselves are essentially blank. Nothing to contribute but irrational hatred and destruction. An obstacle to society's progress, prefering to maintain the status quo, violently if need be.

So I play violent videogames to achieve a cathartic effect. Still, it lingers on my mind...so much suffering, so little hope, and the system that put me through it has yet to suffer for their crimes. Is that right? I have to believe that they can't get away with it, that it'll just naturally catch up to them.

Honestly, part of my fascination and desire to make horror movies stems from this. For just a little while, I can put willing participants into a metaphor for my world. A place full of largely manelovent entities with incomprehensible motives and means. I can plant that seed in their heads, have them doubt the shadows in their own homes. And for just a little while, they might just understand, and we both walk away better for it. I satisfy my need for that, and the audience are better people for having the experience. For once, everyone wins. I think that's the best path. My resentment channeled into a positive outcome, creating grim bloody fables for a society that has forgotten that actions have consequences, no matter how unimportant the victim may seem.

If you say hi to most people, they're going to say hi back. Maybe unless you say it to a bunch of random high school guys and girls. Saying hi to people is a sign of friendliness. That's why people do it. Oh yah, you should look at someone and smile when you say hi to them. Just not in a weird, creepy way.

But when you talk to someone, and you can't look them in the eye, and you fidget; they will consider that unfriendly/asocial/dishonest or whatever. Saying Hi is one thing, having a conversation is harder

They might think you are just nervous and shy.

they can either think you're nervous or shy or you're not interested in talking.

For instance if someone asks you a question and if you give really short answers and without asking a question in return, then people might think you're uninterested in them. Instead, you should answer their question, then ask them a question in return. For instance, i'm doing great how are you doing?


The trick is to make people believe that you actually care about them. Even if you really don't.

If an Aspie does suddenly get interested in talking, does that mean we can call it "The Dark Aspie Rises?"

Agree entirely. I think everyone in the thread realises this. It's one thing to know this intellectually and another to bear it out perfectly in execution, though; especially with emotional baggage muddying the waters.

Going out of your way to harm people is not cool, whatever your psychiatric labels or lack thereof.



Mmh. More or less right, but my experience is that socialisation can be very draining, especially with unknown quantities and/or when I'm in bad shape mentally, which can make my shape even worse. So I do tend to be pretty selectively social as a survival strategy. I'm sure this can make me come across as unfriendly, which is unfortunate, but a very difficult effect to escape in any way I've found.

I have a few friends, which is all I might ask for really.

Yeah. I try to do this when I can. If it's a completely unexpected interaction or I'm very tired or feeling bad, it can be surprisingly difficult to pull off, though. Sometimes it's all I can do to be short with people rather than ignore them, much as I'd like it to be otherwise.

While I can't claim to speak for the OP, I get the distinct impression that the purpose of the thread is to observe and explain the concept of a "dark aspie", not to defend or justify "dark aspies".

I'm sure prison (and hell if you believe in that, I'm an atheist) is full of people who think the world has done them wrong and they have taken their vengeance. With or without an ASD diagnosis, they are criminals and the world is a better place without them.