Do you like being autistic?

Post Reply New Topic

It has its pros and cons

You have no idea how many times I've wished for that. I'd give anything to trade brains with one of my NT family members, or my friend, for about a week, so they could get the full experience of what it's like living the way I do in a variety of situations. I'd also get to compare my own experiences to "normal" ones, and see just how far my differences extend. I think whoever I swapped brains with would have a freaking sensory overload induced meltdown after one day.

I can't imagine not being autistic. I find it easier to imagine being an animal.

I think I'm fine. I'm not so sure about other people.

I wish I didn't have autism because I feel it's the most stigmatized disability in the world compared to ADHD or others, what happens is doctors and the medical community seek out some magic potion to get rid of it and people on the autism are murdered more often than other people because we don't know how to deal with it. No one says get rid of people with Epilepsy or other disability so why is there a need to annihilate ASD? Because we value social skills and relationships as a human trait, it's a shame that I don't have the ability to socialize with people. I wish I could interact with people and form friendships. I feel inferior for lacking social skills and I would love to bond with someone I could talk to. I can be insecure and jealous when people talk about their social life and it makes me feel so bad I distance myself from everyone. I wish I could combine my life with the social circle and solitude. I felt a lot of shame and guilt for having it all my life. I blamed myself for the troubles I went through and never thought of associating myself with other autistics because I seemed like a normal person on the outside and inside, which I can easily pass for normal. Which is why I'm reluctant to hang out with other autistics because I hate having to face so much stigma and the feeling of being marginalized. I was in denial all the time and never had been able to accept myself. As long as I realized I was struggling with internalized oppression. I don't value myself sometimes. If I had been someone who likes being social and alone I'd be much happier, then I love myself, the first thing to do before joining the social crowd. I love being an introvert but at the same time I may want companionship. I thought my life would be fulfilled if I could balance some social scene and alone time. That way I don't feel lonely and a lot of inferiority.

It's who I am. I don't know anything else.

I've been good with it since I decided to get a formal diagnosis.