How Bullying Is Overblown: The Flaws Of The Disadvocates

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BTW people claiming to have MASTERS in education claimed that bullying is less than it is, and given NO help! The very fact that we are even DISCUSSING it proves them wrong. If someone states we can live without water, I will not listen EVEN if they went to school for a thousand years and "learned everything".

Likewise, having a degree can't validate anything you say about bullying not being bad, etc....

Yeah... uh, guy, have ya had rock, chairs, etc. thrown at your head? Been physically attacked by twenty of such gorillas, you'd see it's not as overblown as you may think. These people are violent savages, who do anything an alpha orders. Not to mention, many public school students are nowadays armed with shivs, and violence has been glorified, largely by the "P.C" revolution.
Have you had to fight for your life, as a child, among other children? Unless you have, I really don't think you can say that such is in any way overblown - it's very, very serious.

Bullies can cause suicide, because it causes emotional pain and self doubt and loathing. Some of my bullies gave it their best effort to hurt my feelings, and even told me to die a number of times. At least a couple of them maned up and apologised, which was good enough for me. Forgiving someone is one thing, but oking what they do wrong is not right.

Blame is blame, and to say that the victim chose to hurt inside... sorry.. I refuse to believe that. Extreme, ongoing emotional pain leads to suicide quite easily. I can tell you right here that the brain knows very well how physical pain is nothing compaired to our emotions.

If I didn't have my ex close friend D, and my mother and sister didn't give a #$ about how I hurt inside. I WOULD be dead, no question in the least. It took nearly 9 years after leaving public school for me to actualy start smileing naturaly and regularly. Not egsagerating. I don't like it very much when someone says it's not a big deal. It is a big deal and can do alot of harm.

Last edited by LiendaBalla on 31 Jul 2008, 10:59 am, edited 8 times in total.

I think men get physically bullied more than women do.

When I was a kid someone I grew up with who was supposed to be this "sisterlike" person, someone who was so good and kind to befriend an obvious slow witted outcast that she and others percieved me as being, turned out to be my fiercist enemy. She was the one that constantly tried to fight me and she tried to get others to do it too. Or others would go to her tell her I was bothering them and would she "kick my ass for them" just stupid petty crap like that. It was just dumb.

If I was "NT" it might not have been a big deal but I was really skinny and weak and for some reason more afraid than everyone else. I had much more anxiety and couldn't deal with their verbal, emotional and at times physical assaults. To me, it was a much bigger deal than it would have been to an "NT".

Now I don't trust people so much or believe that they will be fair. How can I when someone who was supposed to be a good friend treated me in such a deceptively horrible way?

I admit that if she were male it might have been much worse. From what I have read on here, men experience the worst bullying.

Well, If you're a victim than fight back back, don't expect people to come to your aid for no reason, that's a big problem on this site, al ot of you expect things and then you try to cover it up by misleading people.
the reason why I brought up the suicide thing is the internet freedom aspect of it. when you have a third party trying to decide who is right and who is wrong then it leads to draconian solutions being imposed perhaps worse than the bad experiences.
Stop expecting the NT world to bend over backwards to accomodate you.
Methinks you don't really have a life, 4000 posts...

What about bullying on a larger scale? Bullying between the nations? Surely no one would dismiss that as a tempest in a teapot.

Bullying has been socially acceptable for thousands of years. Just look at the Bible for the greatest fictional bully ever. The God in the old testament could never be described as anything other than a bully.

People impose their will, it's a fact of life aspies, get over it

Personal attacks and other forms of bullying on this site will get me imposong my will upon you, or at least get me to pulling posting privileges.

I dunno, Goliath of Gath was a pretty solid bully archetype, as far as the OT goes. If you just hand over your lunch money right away, the worst God will do is a wedgie and/or an Indian burn ... what you've gotta do is tattle on Him.

Bend over backwards? *YOU* have it backwards. I HAVE bent over backwards for OTHERS! As for my life, did I claim to?

If only self-defense was so viable an option as you make it sound, FreedomG. I did fight, tooth and nail, with whoever put me down and went out of their way to hurt me simply because I was different. Unfortunately, due to so-called "Zero Tolerance" policies, and in some cases a very skewed idea of what counted as "violence," I was the one who ended up the worst in the end, whether it be by telling them off or by laying into them (something that I only did twice to my memory, and only a handful of times at very most). They could call me names, they could torment me by pushing all my sensory buttons until I wanted to crawl away and die somewhere, they could throw things at me and push me out of my seat, but if I were to strike back, or even go to any lengths to AVOID them, I'd be the one sitting there waiting for my parents to pick me up from school, or bringing a form back home saying how I'd been a bad, bad girl for not letting everyone beat on me without complaint. I am not the only one. Nearly every person I know who's been bullied and has made a stand has ended up suffering for it.

And should it really be counted as "bending over backwards," people having the decency to refrain from and make others refrain from mistreating otherwise? Funny, I'd call it being a decent human being. In other work settings, you could get someone fired or sued for creating a hostile work environment. But if you're a student, no such luck, it would seem. Too much according to some to expect others to be polite.

Er, before I 'fought back' no one broke my nose. Perhaps you think receiving a broken nose and a couple more nasty names (ALF, Barbara Streisand) was somehow an improvement on the situation; I do not share such a view.
As a short female with motor-dyspraxia, I cannot see what good you think might have come from me fighting back against a group of boys, all taller, bigger, weightier and more aggressive than myself. One on one would have stacked the odds in favour of the aggressor, but single white female against the group of them.....not a realistic solution. As the grown up version of the girl who tried, I can only point to my still visibly crocked nose as evidence of the unsuccessful nature of such a tactic as tested in the real world.


I expect schools to protect students from the physical violence of other students for good reason (rather than for 'no reason'). In the first instance, schools have a legal obligation to provide a safe environment. Teachers themselves would not typically put up with daily physical assault from their peers, and if another teacher attacked a teacher, the police would be expected to come to the victim's aid. You see assaulting people is not merely bad manners, it's also illegal.

Do you think only children should be exempt from protection against assaults that no adult would be expected to put up with, or do you also disapprove of the illegality of violence directed against adults?


That's a big problem with your posting, a lot of it seems random comments about you-only-know what, and then you either try to cover it up, or perhaps better explicate it with yet more random comments about you-only-know what. If you are attempting to clarify rather than obfuscate, being specific rather than vague might be a productive tactic for you in achieving that strategy.

So far as I know, no legal jurisdiction has legalised suicide while criminalising suicide on the internet. However, I'm not a legal expert and certainly am unfamiliar with the finer points of law in most legal jurisdictions. Perhaps you could specify the legal jurisdiction and specific legislation and/or legal precedent that gives rise to your concern.

It can lead to draconian solutions being imposed, it can also lead to efficient, mutually acceptable solutions being imposed, or mutually agreed on by all parties, or some other outcome. However, we do know that being born inevitably leads to dying, which is perhaps worse than the bad experience of being born. This has not stopped literally billions of people from going at it like the clappers between the sheets. As with 3rd party derived solution-imposition in the event of disputes, being born is not always perfect, and can turn out badly - worse even than it started, and further it is the leading '1st cause' of all human deaths, but it's not necessarily worse than the alternative.


There is no NT world. There is one planet/world and it belongs as much to me as to anyone.

I do not get something for nothing, so why should NTs? If NTs want and expect accommodations in respect of their needs and desires (and be assured they do), then they need to be prepared to give even as they get. I see no reason why having a disability should entail my being excluded from all the accommodations that are being made by everyone for NTs, especially since I'm expected to (and do) bend over forwards, backwards, sideways and in various other contortions to accommodate NTs.

Why would an entity that lacks life be more (rather than less) likely to have a post count of some number or other on an internet forum....in case it escaped your attention, dead men (and women for that matter) do not produce forum posts any more readily than they tell secrets.

I disagree with the sentiment expressed by the OP. Bullying is a serious and endemic problem caused by the human love of power (both physical and social) and the abuse of this power. Also the ridiculous desire to dominate and control others which seems acceptable to many people.

Bullying has no place in the schoolyard or classroom and no place in the office, factory, or wherever someone happens to work. In my opinion, public schools are the best place to inculcate society from bullying; we can teach children broader acceptance and thereby reduce bullying. Developmental disorders and psychiatric/emotional disorders are among the few major things left that are still somewhat socially acceptable, especially among children. Instead of letting peers reinforce children's proclivity to sometimes laugh at and even bully people who look or behave oddly, we need to teach them compassion and acceptance. After all, wouldn't many of us here not have the problems with depression, social anxiety, etc. that we do if our classmates took the time to get to know us and befriend us instead of bullying and ostracizing?

Easier said than done