Cliche advice that sets us back

Post Reply New Topic

"You over think things. Stop thinking so much."

My response? "Stop breathing so much". After all, it's about as easy.

this.

why don't you have anything in common with other people?! make something in common!

think positive and good things will happen.

just talk to people

you need to look a certain way to attract people and be successful

you should become a chemist- that way you can take time off work easily when you have children after you get married(from my boss to me at a special meeting devoted to giving me career advice, hand was on thigh/knee. sexist sh%^)

just try make friends

smile

have fun.

I also hate it when somebody says one cliche, then when I go by their cliche, they then offer me the opposite cliche. For example:-

Me: ''I feel so miserable that I can't socialise''
Other person: ''Then get out and about, meet more people and you'll get more desensitised to those feelings''

Me (after socialising and meeting people): ''I feel so miserable when being in an environment where I should be making friends but can't''
Other person: ''Then don't waste your time around social people then, find a special interest and try to work on projects and then you don't have to worry what the NT world is doing any more''

OR

Me: ''I feel I'm ugly, I've got no men looking at me or anything''
Other person: Then look up and smile more often, men might like you then. Just believe in yourself''

Me (after smiling and look up and believing in myself): ''Wow, I got a lot of nice looks from men today! That's made me feel better! I can't look that nutty or aloof then!''
Other person: ''No, that's because you look vulnerable and men look at you in the hope of being able to get you so they could take advantage of you''

I don't even know where to start with stupid cliche advice, I f*****g hate it all especially the condescending dismissive crap. It would be a wonderful day when all these worthless dickheads get a SCUD missile straight to their houses. Let's see if they'd practice what they preach...

f**k them all. I especially hate when some stupid douche expects me to just take their word for it as if it's self-evident while it's ME that has so much at stake if their advice backfires on me. Yeah keep feeding me some BS from the comfort of your armchair while I'm fighting an uphill battle, I really need it.

If NTs had empathy, like what most believe on WP, then wouldn't they be able to put themselves in our shoes and try to offer better advice or to try to help, rather than thinking something like saying ''just be yourself'' or ''just hold your head up high'' will solve all your problems when even those cliches don't always solve problems even for some NTs themselves?

This for me too. When I am comfortable around people I'm still too intense.... working on it!

Reading through this is like reading a page out of my life xD

A common one "It gets better.". No, no it doesn't.

"Lots of people like you" No they don't because they have a funny way of showing it.
"You'll find someone." How, when you can't even bring yourself to say that I'm not ugly or non-good looking?

People have no idea do they?

"Take my advice"
"Why?"
"Because it's the best advice"
"How do you know?"
"Because I believe in it."
"But others have given me opposite advice"
"Trust ME."
"Why you?"
"Because it's ME giving you this advice."
"The others said the same, to trust them because it's THEM giving the advice."
Rolls eyes and changes the subject.

I think they give the same advice to NTs and NTs love it -- because NTs love advice that doesn't entail a call for action. Advice that's worth nothing is worth doing nothing about. Eg: NTs go to the therapist until there's something they really need to work on, then they drop out. This is NOT prejudice or bashing, but a lifetime of failing miserably and learning from my mistakes. Nowadays I know better than giving an NT advice that implies actual work on their part - they used to hate me for it. And I'm saying this with respect for their preference and without criticism, because I'd be the same way as them if only I could afford doing nothing to improve myself, if only I was ok enough to keep a job the way I was born, like they are.

If you think things through you will never say something that upsets people—this one is stupid to me, because I have tried it and apparently thinking about something and coming to a conclusion people do not like, will upset them, even if you thought about it.
Do onto others as you wish they would do onto you (golden rule)--- balderdash because if I want people to talk to me about Glee so I talk to them about it, they get mad.
Its always worse before it gets better--- wtf is the point of that?
If its obvious don’t say it—how am I supposed to know it was obvious?
Less is more—again . . I don’t get that one.
If you put more effort into paying attention and not being self centered, you will get along with people better.—BS?
Others have it worse than you.—I do not think that comparing misery is that helpful.

Has anyone noticed how these nauseating tautologies labelled advice always without exception, seem to be NT inventions?

'The truth will set you free'

oh wait...

I would easily guess these ole' cliches do work for the ones that have "it" somewhere hidden ( innately). It may make take effort on their part and outside "help" that adapts their brain to this change.

I have always took the position or stance that the choices or the interest shown in something by a person is directly connected to "ability."

"I could become a ___________or do ___________ if I wanted to, so could you," might be true for them, but it is vacuously true, due to the condition or premise being false. It is synthetically true.

It all boils down to inexperience, thus a lack in insight in people who spout this stuff.

But strangly, when I'm un-moved by these bits " of wise advice" I've noticed that this makes the advice givers re-think this - that it may all indeed be hollow. The power of suggestion? Obi- One Kenobi?


I always find these things amusing for some reason.

Story of my life...

Wow, SCUD missiles? The s**t I say when I'm in a cranky mood. I still f*****g detest people's vague condescending BS but I guess I need to chill sometimes. Still, it's hard not to be mad when people blame you for being skeptical of their advice. Like thanks, I totally need vague advice to address specific problems

Last edited by AceOfSpades on 29 Jul 2012, 6:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

quote {But strangly, when I'm un-moved by these bits " of wise advice" I've noticed that this makes the advice givers re-think this - that it may all indeed be hollow. The power of suggestion? Obi- One Kenobi? Razz}

'We all have our crosses to bear' wise Yoda

Last edited by Surfman on 29 Jul 2012, 6:07 pm, edited 2 times in total.