Childfree by choice

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I wouldn't say I'm an anti-natalist but I definitely agree there are plenty of people already here not being looked after without me reproducing for self fulfilment. In a book made up of interviews between Bono and a journalist friend Bono said something that I agreed with wholeheartedly; the two most important events in our life, our birth and our death, are decided for us without our consent. No one asks to be born and once you are there's no getting out alive. Philosophically it's a huge dilemma and potential imposition that no one really thinks about and one of the only defenses against it is the naturalistic fallacy.

Why would you be putting a child what you have been through. Create a better environment than you had.

Regarding birth as an imposition? When did you first have this thought?

I agree with constantly creating a better environment but I still have no interest in personally putting anyone into the current environment. The creation of life being seen as an imposition isn't my idea, I was briefly describing the position taken by anti-natalists. It's a pretty unpopular notion that people understandably have strong reactions to including myself at times but for my part I definitely don't want to add a thinking, feeling thing to all this. I think I'm too anxious and I can't reconcile all the bad things that might/will happen with all the good things that might/will happen.

I have one child, a fifteen year old boy. He greatly enhanced my life.
My responses to your points:
#1 A baby does take up a lot of your time. I found that it did not bother me, and also he was good to use as an excuse to not go places or leave early, which in turn saved me time. When he was a baby/toddler i managed to draw and program a computergame and write a book...
#2 With a young child travelling is a major pain. However, if you have a boy they are likely to grow bigger and stronger than you and by the time he is a teenager he carries your stuff and makes travelling easier!
#3 The child might well turn out to be smarter and more motivated than you. Mine did.
#4 Childbirth was a breeze - although I must point out that I appear to be undersensitive to pain. However, pregnancy is a complete and utter horror. Never been so uncomfortable in my life.
#5 I must say I agree with you there.
#6 Blind or deaf kids have the same chances of growing up to be independent adults as kids who see or hear. I cannot see the problem there.
Mental issues or ret*d would worry me, because I'd be afraid of what would happen to my vulnerable child once I am no longer able to look after them.
#7My son hates noise.

But if you don't want kids, luckily you do not need to have them.

I love this post above!

Thank you

If I really wanted a kid I would get one from our city foster care system. First of all I strongly prefer to have a kid over the age of 10 who is neurodiverse or disabled, if they admit me for the program. Hopefully my apartment isn't considered too small, and hopefully they don't care that I'm not married.

Secondly there are too many people on the planet. If you have not lived in an overpopulated area, I suggest taking a tour of a region of the world that is. No, I don't mean like Los Angeles but in parts of Asia or Africa. This is the future of the developed world, too, if the population keeps going up. Water rationed like you're in the desert. 3-hour each way commutes. Everything is super expensive compared to your rent and there's always another person willing to do your job if you slack even a bit.

I'm definitely child-free by choice. I just don't want a child, I never have. The same thing doesn't make everyone happy, kids would not make me happy.

I think the poster objected to your statement that you would find out that your child is intellectually handicapped when it's "too late"...

Too late for what? abortion?

Hopefully I'll never have kids. My parents were too messed up and I don't want to pass any of those bad traits on. I truly believe my parents shouldn't have had me, especially my mother who was unfit to raise a child.

I don't know if I replied before, but having kids is a HUGE responsibility.

Those not prepared to follow through with it are making a good call to remain childless.

I can respect both your decision not to have children and the decision of others to have children. Parenting is nothing that any past or any condition can determine; if one truly wishes to be a good parent and makes steps towards being a good parent, regardless of what traits, genes, and traumas they may have, then one has a very fair shot at being as good of a parent as we human beings can be.

I am definitely not going to go out of my way to have children. Firstly, my sexual orientation is not conducive to procreation, nor am I successful at finding a partner regardless; secondly, I do not think that my specific personality traits-- my impatience, my low energy reserves, my absent-mindness-- would make me a naturally inclined parent. Nevertheless, should a situation arise in which some young child is in my care for an extended period of time, I would do my best to overcome said traits and ensure that the child is as healthy and happy as I can possibly allow said child to be.

Psychologists told me not to have a child, but I never really thought about it as well, but sometimes I think about it, but I am not functioning enough and now I am 39 years old and still not functioning enough.