How come NTs don't accept us?

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slowmutant
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11 Sep 2008, 8:09 am

Phagocyte wrote:

It's important to remember, that not many NT laypeople have heard of Aspergers, and even fewer still have any sort of working familiarity with it. Realistically, the "neurotypical" populous is more or less apathetic to any specific neurological condition (ASD or otherwise), as opposed to outright fearing or disliking someone because of them. An average person may fear or dislike a particular trait (for example, an aspie's focused knowledge may intimidate them) that is symptomatic of the condition, but there is no "AS vs. NT" war. In the big scheme of the neurological spectrum, those with AS aren't that different than NT's, and if they were, this forum wouldn't have a "not sure if I have it or not" option for your diagnostic status.

There is no war, no culture battle, and no plans of extermination - just the fairly common a**hole who has trouble coping with someone different and/or more intelligent. How far this issue has been bloated out of proportion is blatantly laughable.

QFT

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11 Sep 2008, 8:10 am

slowmutant wrote:

QFT

Thank you. I edited the end slightly to make it less antagonistic and a little more rational. This is kind of a sore topic for me because I am an NT and some of the people I've found the most intelligent and respected most have AS, so I am not keen on being lumped together with bullies just because I don't have an ASD.

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slowmutant
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11 Sep 2008, 8:59 am

This Us vs. Them mentality helps no one. I hate it with a passion.

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11 Sep 2008, 9:09 am

If you give acceptance, you will receive it, 95% of the time. What goes around comes around.

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11 Sep 2008, 3:35 pm

Phagocyte wrote:

It's important to remember, that not many NT laypeople have heard of Aspergers, and even fewer still have any sort of working familiarity with it.

I agree with you there. I've told the people I'm close to, including the friend I mentioned before that I have AS and how things are for me. But even now they know i'm different they still expect me to be normal and enjoy the same things they do. I tell them I don't like big social gatherings but they keep invinting me to them.

ReeseLightnin
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11 Sep 2008, 3:45 pm

KenM wrote:

I tell them I don't like big social gatherings but they keep invinting me to them.

So DON'T GO. PROBLEM SOLVED, YOU POOR VICTIM.

KenM
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11 Sep 2008, 5:44 pm

If I do go, I don't act right and people don't like me and I look like a freak.

If i don't go, people think i'm a freak for not wanting to socialize.

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11 Sep 2008, 6:28 pm

If you're seen as a freak either way, why not just do what you want to do? It's the same consequences only you're less upset because you didn't have to deal with going.

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slowmutant
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11 Sep 2008, 6:29 pm

KenM wrote:

If I do go, I don't act right and people don't like me and I look like a freak.

If i don't go, people think i'm a freak for not wanting to socialize.

Not wanting to socialize is freakish IMO.

KenM
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11 Sep 2008, 6:37 pm

slowmutant wrote:

Not wanting to socialize is freakish IMO.

If I ask one of my friends if they want to hang out and they say no, I don't think its freaky. I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to be alone for a bit.

But if I ever say no to them when they ask me to hang out they always make me feel bad when I say no. They tell me its not normal to want to be alone, but I respect there feelings when they want to be alone.

Double standard.

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11 Sep 2008, 7:03 pm

KenM wrote:

... if I ever say no to them when they ask me to hang out they always make me feel bad when I say no...

No one can make you feel anything without your cooperation. Just say 'No' and go your own way.

F.

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11 Sep 2008, 8:37 pm

KenM wrote:

I have a good friend. we work together, he knows I have AS and don't like social situations. He invited me over to his place for a couple of BBq's this summer. The only reason I went was because another NT friend was over and I did not want her to be bored. I put on a good act pretending that I had a good time. But i was totally miserable and felt very fake and wrong for not acting how I normally would.

I told my friend that invited me up about how I felt. He seemed very offended and taken aback. Even thou he knows how I feel about those situations. I'm suposted to go over there tonight but I told him today that I don't feel like doing anything tonight. He still thinks I'm coming up.

Why can't NTs accept the fact that not everyone likes to socialize? Why are we labeled as freaks because of it?

I get depressed thinking about going to these things. I was depressed all day thinking about having to go over there and fulfill my so called 'social obligation". I told me friend I was deptressed and did not want to go over tonight. He said the best thing I can do for my depression is go out and soicalize, do things. He has no idea the reason I'm depressed is because of those social situations.

Your friend knows that you have AS so he is trying to help you socialize and make friends. Just be more forward with him next time situations like this arise.

slowmutant
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11 Sep 2008, 10:20 pm

KenM you are a whiner.

Warsie
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11 Sep 2008, 11:15 pm

slowmutant wrote:

KenM you are a whiner.

we get that you don't like him

be friendly people

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12 Sep 2008, 3:02 am

They are takers instead of leavers.

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12 Sep 2008, 2:37 pm

I have found that most people either adore me or hate my guts. My parents love my uniqueness. My dad probably has some undiagnoses ADHD or possibly even some AS traits. My mom probably does too. I'm not their biological child either. My brother knows a lady who runs an animal recsue and brought me to meet her. I saw the horses and bolted off to pet them before even greeting her. That really impressed her. The way my best friend decribes her childhoof if she was growing up today, she probably would have been diagnosed with AS. A meerkat biologist I used to talk to even said he possibly thinks he has some autism traits. So most people who like me as I am probably have some hidden AS traits themselves

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