What if we're just ret*d?

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Very true. Doesn't help much though. It's not that easy to just wish your problems away and shift your perspective.

Sorry, went back and had a look at your post and I don't recognise it at all. I must have majorly misread it or something because my memory is telling me you wrote something completely different. Still, I'm not as optimistic as you that our problems are so surmountable.

No, it's not. I think for most people it takes discipline. I try to do it, though I am not always successful. I would not say that I try to wish my problems away, but I do try to mindfully focus on things other than my problems and I do try to mind my perspective.

I find that depending upon what I focus on in my life, I either have a pretty good life or a rather crappy one. I could choose to focus on the fact that I am a single mother of 2 special needs kids who's closest family is about 2000 miles away, who is stuck in a job that causes me stress and does not make me happy but that I cannot leave because I need to provide for my kids, or I can focus on the fact that my kids are kind, honest, happy kids who any parent would be proud to have and that I have the ability to function effectively with way less support than most people I know and that my job allows me to have my kids in a good neighborhood with a good school district.

I feel way more satisfied with my life when I see it the latter way. But it's the same life, either way.

Let me give you a bit of advice....

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6WHBO_Qc-Q[/youtube]


TheSunAlsoRises

HA! I knew it was only a short matter of time before someone busted out the "Simple Jack" reference. Well played!

If you're satisfied with your life, I don't see the problem. If you have positives that you can hold on to, that's great.

Ultimately, people find meaning in their lives however they can. Some of the most determined and happy people I know suffer from disabilities.

And on a less serious note: I rather doubt we fit the stereotypical depiction of that nasty word "ret*d." I say this because everyone I've ever met who could be classified by that ugly word was really, really happy.

Hell, didn't Ralphie May do a bit on how happy ret*d people are?

Part of the problem (especially when it comes to the colloquial vs. clinical issue I mentioned on the previous page) is that, whether we like it or not, the word "ret*d" (again, in the colloquial sense) has enormous utility. It represents a concept, a palette of connotations, that simply aren't captured by any other word. I totally understand why people object to it. But it's very useful.

I don't think we should hate on "ret*d" all that much because I think we would've come up with a word for what it describes anyway. It was just a matter of which letters and in what order.

The punchline here is that, conceptually, the colloquial "ret*d" is similar to "autistic", while the clinical "ret*d" is (again, conceptually) miles away from either of them. But of course autistic people are practically designed to think that diagnostic criteria = bottom line. So they miss the whole point. Of course! That's the essence of being a ret*d (if you will). I don't know if any of this qualifies as proper irony, but it at least smacks of it.

Colloquial ret*d: Brain messed up such that it's apparent in the individual's behavior
Autistic: Brain messed up such that it's apparent in the individual's behavior
Clinical ret*d: IQ below 70

No worries. But I'm not sure what you don't understand, I think what I wrote is clear? I don't want you to feel confused or bad, so below I will paste in my original post with the relevant parts highlighted in bold:


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dizzee wrote:
How can you accept this and live a normal life knowing that you're at disadvantage? What's the point of living then if you can never catch up to others?



Initially I wondered what on earth you meant, as people with AS are at least average intelligence with many above average intelligence, some even being genuises. However, I decided to look up the correct meaning of the word ret*d, because everyone immediately assumes it means of low intelligence. It might interest you to look at this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_retardation

...from which I quote here:
Quote:
Mental retardation (MR) is a generalized disorder appearing before adulthood, characterized by significantly impaired cognitive functioning and deficits in two or more adaptive behaviors. It has historically been defined as an Intelligence Quotient score under 70.[1] Once focused almost entirely on cognition, the definition now includes both a component relating to mental functioning and one relating to individuals' functional skills in their environment. As a result, a person with a below-average intelligence quotient (BAIQ) may not be considered mentally ret*d.


Therefore, the real issue is in how you intended the word ret*d to be understood in your question. The word itself is mis-used and apparently misunderstood by many people (including myself before I looked it up).

All I can contribute, is that many people with HFA and AS are highly intelligent and have achieved much in their lives. So who says you cannot catch up to others? For many it's not about what they are capable of, it's more about luck and perceptions by others. Anyone, no matter of their disability, has the opportunity to achieve greatness with perseverence, and sometimes the right circumstances.

i do not subscribe to the term "we" (or any of it's tenses).

if i am ret*d, then the universe is an even more stunning situation than i thought. i have my idea of the universe, and i am complacent with it, and if that idea is a ret*d idea, then the universe is even better than i suspect or can determine. "yee haah" (as cowboys stereotypically are known to say)

but for me there is no "we". there is only "me", and that cuts me off from so many avenues of experience. oh well. "if you never try, you will never cry." was once something i believed. but now i know that fertility of any type must contain more than one input.

your question is actually rather lame. i am not mentally ret*d and i guess neither are you.

how do these threads make it to 7 pages?

it is because people have opinions and type them.

My regular peers called me a ret*d when I was in Grade School and it hurt me very deeply. I actually thought I was ret*d until my mum told me about my autism when I was 15. I thought that everybody hated me because they all thought I was ret*d. I was relieved when I found out that I wasn't. I have nothing against Mentally Challenged people, either. Some of the most interesting people that I've met happened to be Mentally Challenged.

lol, ok





Specifically, this was the sentence I disagreed with. I don't believe everyone has the potential to achieve greatness. I don't believe that everyone has the potential to live a worthwhile life. Disabilities make it so much harder and I feel that certain disabilities make it impossible.

If I'm really depressed I'll think of myself as ret*d. But even so, there are many who have been diagnosed with mental retardation who end up finding ways to contribute to society.

Dean's list here, don't let anyone tell you that autism is synonymous with retardation (if they do, don't believe it), it's a ridiculous misconception that many of us on a day to day basis prove without a doubt is absolutely incorrect. Look up ASAN, see the kind of things we can do if we stop basing our lives on labels and Hollywood fantasy, and instead look to make proper humans of ourselves in this society. Imagine it this way, when people say spectrum one often conjures up the image of a pendulum that goes from right to left, with one side being deficient and the other, frankly, NT. In reality we live in a universe of possibilities in which all manner of people exist with all kinds of abilities and ideas, all of worth and importance by one mean or another. We are not born autistic, we are born human then given names to define us to another's standard, to compartmentalize us in the greater machine. I'm not trying to be poetic, but you seem to be transfixed on the importance of titles, not acknowledging the existence of the individual. By this standard you presented, people are being place on a scale of worthiness by right of birth, but you have to consider by whose standards people are being judged, and whether or not you ought to share such concepts.

If a ret*d man were to save a child from a burning building would his action be made less significant by the fact that he has a low IQ? Is it innately virtuous to be an NT; are all non-autistic people righteous by birth? I think that men make themselves, not titles. Words are made pointless by action.