23 May 2013, 5:05 am
23 May 2013, 2:04 pm
I also struggle with basic conversation and to know what's appropriate, when it's my turn and when to stop. Only due to multiple experiences do I have any clue but as a teenager, it was very awkward.
I was very much in the same situation. Although I am way older now, this is still a problem: I don't see when a woman is interested in me, but when a woman is interested in someone else I often see that. When the same signals are sent to me, I think I am imagining things, because in the past I confused it with bullying and it made me a misogynist. I learned, women are not honest; they play with me.
A woman has to do a lot more to convince me, perhaps way more than she is willing. When I see a woman and she is not smiling or something, I won't approach her, regardless her appearance. I still think I am creepy in a way. When a woman decides to talk - even to flirt - with me, I still think that she finds me trustworthy to talk to or doesn't find me a creep, but I won't think for a second, she could be interested. Illusions hurt.
24 May 2013, 4:32 am
reading these i am reminded of sooo many situations i misread or didn't understand. makes me feel a bit better now knowing why.
one was especially weird. i was at eye doctor to update my prescription and at the end i think my eyes were dilated or something so i couldnt see very well and the doctor was leading me out back to the reception area. i think he must have put his arm on me to lead me out but i misread it as him trying to hug me. i have no idea why he'd hug me and didnt know what to do so in panic i just hugged him back and it was super weird! and then i gathered from his and receptionist reaction that he hadnt actually meant to hug me so then started thinking crap why did i just hug my eye doctor?! they must think i'm nuts! i could never figure out why i hugged him until now and realizing i misread social cues and panicked. i was so embarrassed i had to find a new eye doctor. heh actually misreading friendliness for romantic interest caused me to switch two dentists as well. gah i'm embarrassed just remembering this stuff! 
24 May 2013, 5:07 am
when i was in college this girl was interested in me and we ate lunch together a bunch and went out to dinner a few times alone and a bunch also with other people. and she'd walk closely beside me and push me teasingly. for some reason i really had no idea during all this that she was interested in me or why she pushed me. i was completely oblivious until one day at lunch when everyone got mad at me because i was insulting the programming language she used for class or something. they all called me a jerk and she stopped talking to me. i was really confused why everyone was suddenly upset with me. it took me a year to realize she had liked me and those times we ate out were dates and that my friends knew we were dating and got upset when i treated her insensitively as just some random other person and no one special. i felt terrible and embarrassed finally realizing that she really liked me and i had rejected her without knowing anything was going on until it was all over.
24 May 2013, 5:10 am
Aside from that, my biggest issue involves knowing how/when to keep conversation going, or shifting from one topic to another--or sometimes even starting conversation. I didn't realize until fairly recently that I'm not supposed to let the other person guide the conversation in casual social encounters--I'm supposed to ask questions and engage the other person too.
I didn't seem to get the idea of "I'm busy, go away." Coworkers had to occasionally shoo me away from their desk.
(As with visits at the psychologist and friends).
Sounds very much like the things I´ve had to work on, - the bit about showing gratitude too
(I´ve somehow thought, that it would show on my face).
24 May 2013, 8:36 am
24 May 2013, 9:46 am
