What do you wish your teachers had known about you?

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Hi,

I am new here and am so excited that I found this website. I am a teacher of children with autism. The longer I teach, the more I realize how much I still have to learn! My students range in age from 5 to 10 years old. They are wonderful kids with so much potential.

I hope that it is okay with you all that I am here as a neurotypical person who wants to learn. I want to do all I can to help my students, and one thing I felt was missing was the link to adults with autism.

I have two questions I'd like to pose. What was helpful to you in school, or what do you wish your teachers had done differently?

Also, I have one ten year old student who uses about 10 verbal words and signs about 10 more. Many would consider her low functioning as she has a lot of self-stim behaviors, isn't completely toilet trained, etc. However, there is a brightness that I see in her and she really struggles to communicate to others. Many of her responses are atypical, for example, instead of saying "Hello" or waving, she will put her arm in front of my nose to sniff. Rather than turn it into a negative interaction, I will pretend to sniff her arm and then greet her in a typical way by saying "hello". I don't want to discourage her from communicating. I know in many programs, they would try to discourage the arm sniffing, but I am seeing that as a step toward getting her to interact, which is better than nothing at all. I'd love to know your thoughts on this.

Another thing we do in our room is when she gets an attitude (she IS 10 and near puberty), we fill in words by saying what we think she is thinking. It seems like she really likes that, like we're understanding what she means. Do you think that is okay? She has a great sense of humor and we use that a lot in her daily program too. She loves it when we joke with her.

Thank you for letting me be part of this group!

Pat

Wow, it's good you're asking! Erm... let's see.
I wish my teachers had explained things in a different way when I wasn't getting something, instead of repeating it like a broken record. Sometimes the smallest detail that was missed or a different analogy can make the penny drop.

I wish my teachers had understood that when I was "naughty" or withdrew, I was overwhelmed by noise or the other children were picking on me. Bright lights, poking, or computers whining can be agony if you have acute senses.

Safe places to retreat to or a minute of time out from a stressful situation can make all the difference.

I wish my teachers had understood that I had a school phobia, and that was the reason for my debilitating stomach aches.

I wish some hadn't decided that I was merely defiant, or that more pressure equals results.

If you're interested, there a slim book available called "10 things every child with Autism wishes you knew." I hope this helps!

NTs are always welcome!
I'm what you would consider higher functioning, mild AS. I wasnt diagnosed until high school. But I think if I were 8 today I would be diagnosed since there is so much more awareness. So I went through a normal school program, I was in a few classes for speech therapy in grade school and once in like 4th or 5th grade I was asked to join a group where they talked about how to make friends (even then I knew i wanted no part of it as I felt I had all the friends I wanted, zero, not that I had trouble making them).

So I'm thinking back and I'm finding it hard to think of what woulda or coulda been done different. I can think of one thing that you may not like, but I think teachers maybe coulda laid off more. I can think of a few times teachers would get on me, or involve parents, as to why I was doing things differently. And I was far more frustrated with the 'intervention' and it made me want to continue the behavior even more.
I'm sure some of the younger pact can elaborate and provide better answers because honestly, most of my school experiance is closed away in a bottle way back in the depths of my brain never to be remembered again =P.

I also think it's a great idea to get feed back from adults with autism. Find some that would be willing to volunteer their time to sit down with the class and discuss their profession. Make a week of it, finding out what kinds of professions work well with autistic behaviors.

I'm a project estimator for a commercial painting company. I spend all day reading 200 page blue prints and 1,000 page spec books and filling up an entire notebook with size formulas and cost calculations. It's tedious and time consuming and get to sit in office where i'm not bothered and it's perfect.

I am sure you already know this but when I am unresponsive and head down on the desk or something I hate the way I am asked are you feeling all right, or anything at all hence the withdrawal.
The most annoying thing is when a teacher asks you to say how you think a character in a book is feeling when you can hardly describe what you are feeling.

I'm also maybe gonna derail a little bit. I want to turn the question on you.

How do you approach it? It's making me curious, what is an environment like in your class room?

I got in trouble a lot for covering my ears, staring out the window while the teacher was talking (or just staring off into space). And a lot of it was out of frustration. I couldnt concentrate if we were broken up into groups and there were 5 groups of people talking so I had to do something. I could never be still, sitting in a desk for more than 20 minutes at a time was frustrating and after about a half hour it didnt matter what the teacher was saying, no matter how interesting, I had to do something so I would space out to try and forget, or a lot of times resort to stimming to calm myself down.


Is there a line of classes you took in college? A passion stemming from your daughter? Do you have some form of written curriculum you could share?

First your two questions. Flexibility is the one word answer for me. It is largely a systemic thing rather than an individual teacher thing. When teachers were willing to compromise and be flexible with me I made progress. When they fought me to just behave like an NT kid, let's just say nobody got what they wanted or needed. Of course neither they nor I knew I was something besides NT at that point. Not to mention many NT kids would be far better off if they had smaller classes that had a teacher able to be flexible and adjust to specific student needs. oh. I'm going to be very emphatic about this part. Allow. For. Decompression. If you don't understand what I mean I will happily elaborate.
As to the sniffing, you call it atypical and I'm not sure I'd agree exactly. NTs regularly smell each others hair/neck/wrist to get body scents in close relationships. You don't want to discourage communication but it is something the girl will at some point need to learn when is and is not appropriate.
The entire premise of low functioning versus high functioning is asinine and demeaning. I understand there is some pragmatic use to it, but I can't be comfortable with a system of classification that regards a highly intelligent sentience trapped inside a disobedient vessel low functioning.
The danger in letting somebody speak through you in a situation like this is letting yourself begin to speak for them. By way of your suggestions you reveal what you want them to be saying and they just go along with what you want because it requires less energy. She has some verbalization and some signing, has anybody considered/addressed with the parents assistive communication devices like ProLoqou if even on a temporary basis as she continues any speech therapy or whatever else she and her parents and their support are working on?

I found rules to be confusing because when kids would break them, it would confuse me so I would think it was okay to do them because they didn't get in trouble when they did it. I wish people understood that in my elementary school instead of keeping on punishing me because it sure didn't work. I kept fighting for my rights thinking I was being discriminated. Sure I hated getting punished but I don't think I cared that much because I still kept doing it. I was a never giver upper. It was mostly the staff that punished me though. I had good teachers during my elementary school years except second grade and my student teacher was horrible in 6th grade, even regular kids had troubles with her.


So if an autistic child breaks rules or misbehaves, it could be because they saw other kids doing it so the kid thought the rule had changed and it was okay to do. Punishing them for it might not do them any good because they might think they are being treated different and they could rebel fighting for their rights to be treated like everyone else.

When I was in school, I hated how teachers grouped the students' desks in "pods" of 4 with no personal space, privacy, or any way to escape from bullying, harassment or other problems. It lets students kick each other under their desks with no way for the teacher to see it. It also put my back to other students, making me vulnerable.

What I wish I had: a desk that was well separate from the other students, at the back of the room, that I could retreat to when it got bad.

I wish the teacher had known that my lashing out was just me being overwhelmed.

I wish they'd realized that making eye contact actually makes it nearly impossible to concentrate on what they're saying, and I can concentrate far better if they let me just lock in on their voice and look in the direction I want.

I wish my fifth grade teacher had known what dysgraphia was instead of yelling at me to write more neatly. I also wish she wasn't a pathetic c**t who called me arrogant (frankly, I hope she dies a miserable death). I also wish my first grade teacher hadn't tried to force my pen into a "correct" position when I was holding it as comfortably as I could. She used to walk by my desk and smear a huge red dot on the back of my right hand with her marker.

I'm pretty sure I'm left handed. By the time I got to first grade, I already knew how to read and right (in English and in French) anyway.

Welcome! Neurotypical people are just fine, I think everyone here appreciates it when you guys want to learn about autism right from the source.

I think it's good that you do the arm-sniff thing. When I was that age, I remember everyone trying to make me do something one way instead of the other way, but they didn't explain WHY, or their reasons weren't very good. I think the best thing a teacher can do is explain why they're making you do something, or why something works the way it does. Answers like "Because that's how it's done" are the worst, because it doesn't explain the effects or consequences.

But it sounds like you're already doing a good job. :3

I hate when the teachers put me on the spot because my speech would escape me. We both knew I was capable of the material, but all i could say was "i don't know i don't know i don't know" and then I started rocking and they said stop being such a little baby and answer the question and everyone snickers at me and it is too much, I don't need this, I'm going home. The teacher says hey, where do you think you are going and I stop look them in the eye and say "Do. Not. EVER. Touch me without my permission." They stop cold and slowly retract the hand and watch me leave, and I walk home and when I come to school the next day, nobody says a WORD. No teachers ever try and touch me without permission again, though.

Thanks so much for all of your advice, it has given me a lot to think about! Willa asked some questions about me, so I'll try to answer them. I have been teaching special education for 24 years. Most of the time, I was working in a big urban district, but 6 years ago we moved to a rural area. Now I work in a very small school, where in the past kids with more challenging special needs were sent 45 minutes away for their education. Three years ago, we started a classroom in our home school, and it has been a great success. One hard thing is that there is a wide age range (kindergarten-6th grade), and the children all have different challenges. In addition to two kids with autism, there is one with cerebral palsy, one who is blind and in a wheelchair, and two with traumatic brain injury. Next year, I will have a third student with autism. Fortunately, my district is wonderful about giving me the supports I need, including several aides who work closely with the kids. Each child is in general education as much as they are able to tolerate. Sometimes this varies by the day.

Willa asked:
It's making me curious, what is an environment like in your class room?

We have a great time in there! We try to make it warm and inviting, and at the same time create a structure where each child can learn. Part of the room is set up with a couch and rug, with toys and beanbag chairs. There is another part that is a changing area, as there are two kids in diapers and two in pullups. We always start our day with 10 minutes of music, the same routine to help the kids get transitioned to being at school. One 6 year old boy, who is autistic, has trouble coming to the table at first. He needs to circle the room and sometimes zoom back and forth several times before he's ready to sit with us. He is a "high energy" kid, so we set up our gym time to be 15 minutes after school started. He has either gym or OT right away, so he is better able to work when he gets back into the room later.

Each child has a set of individualized workbooks or activities, and they work with either an aide or myself. We adjust the work time to the child--if we see frustration beginning we allow them to take a break or go to a different activity. There are many sensory activities available for kids that need that.

I also meet with each child daily individually for reading, math, and writing. Each gets daily speech, and some are mainstreamed for science and social studies, lunch, and recess. If a child is having a difficult day or seems overwhelmed, we adjust to their needs.


Is there a line of classes you took in college?

I went to college in the '80's, and back then everything was about behavior modification. I remember seeing a video about a little girl with autism, and they were trying to get her to speak. She was echolalic, and whenever she repeated what the teacher said, the teacher yelled, "NO!" loudly in her face and looked angry. Eventually, the child stopped responding and they then used cookies to get her to give the response they wanted. This was the approach we were told to use with autistic kids--like "It's my way or the highway." I just could never accept that! It certainly didn't treat the child with any sense of dignity, and I can't see how it fostered communication.

I think, for our class, we try to make the child feel accepted and loved most of all. When S. comes in and wants us to sniff her arm, or she rubs her tummy and wants us to join in her interactions, we do it. Then we greet her in a more traditional way. She has been with us just a year, and she went from not interacting much at all to eye contact, smiles, and attempts to speak. She has let her personality shine through, and we see a kid who really can process more than we knew just a few months ago.

I also hate the "low" vs. "high" functioning distinction. How can I judge how "low" or "high" she is when we are sometimes speaking two different languages? I can't get inside her head to see what's there.

My other child with autism is actually the sibling of this girl. He is amazing--had maybe 20 verbal words in September and now talks nonstop! He knows everyone's name and is learning to read. He does have a lot of anxiety type behaviors--he will scream and obsess on certain people not being in the room, etc. Usually time in a quiet area of the room by himself will help him decompress. This little guy has the ability to be in a general education class if we can get the screaming under control, so I am really hoping we can make progress with this. He is so smart and has so many abilities!

We do try to keep the rules consistent and firm, so that the kids understand what is expected. We also have a daily journal that goes to and from school, so that the parents know how the day went.

A passion stemming from your daughter?
I don't have a daughter with autism, but I do have a lot of kids! I have five, ranging in age from 9-14. Three of them have special physical needs, and three of them are adopted. It makes for a crazy household!

Do you have some form of written curriculum you could share?
Not really, because each child learns so differently. I do try to take the state standards for Science and SS and just hit a little of everything at the various grade levels I teach. Not a great approach, probably, but I don't know how else to get it all in.

With Reading, they are all using different things. One is using pictures (PECS) matched to words, one is reading standard material, one is learning strictly sight words, two are nonreaders, and one is still working on letter sounds. In math, I focus on very basic stuff (computation, money, time).

I'll end with a fun story of something that happened last week. Remember the "high energy" boy I told you about? He loves to stalk birds on the playground. He was outside in gym class, and he actually caught a robin! He was the hero of the first grade and earned the respect of the whole school!

Maybe I can be of some help. I am a teenager with autism and I am in advanced placement and honors classes. Although I seem "normal" much of the time, there are still differences in the way I think and comprehend things.

I wish my teachers would realize that I don't always understand something when explained one way, but if phrased another way it will likely make sense. It is trial and error, of course, but they assume I just will never understand it.

I also would like them to see that when I have shut down or withdrawn that it is best to leave me alone for a few minutes. Touching and talking and asking will only make it worse, not better.

Sometimes a teacher believes that they need to talk for me or force me to make eye contact. Trying to talk for me when I am struggling to put my thoughts into words is not good, because it causes me to have to start over again. Eye contact usually pulls my concentration from the words being said. I do not focus well on both words and eyes at the same time.

If you have any question, please feel free to send me a message. Your students are very lucky to have such a wonderful teacher as you. Thank you for caring about their futures.