Feeling Like An Imposter?

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Do you ever feel like a complete and utter fake? Like every word you say is a lie?

Are your perceptions of your social awkwardness much worse than reality? Do your perceptions of your abilities and failures match up with reality?

I really, really struggle with all of this. I'm trying to find out if it's an Autistic thing or a Schizophrenic thing or what. I've heard it called Impostor syndrome?

Yes, it happens from time to time.
This leads to me being confused and panicked.

Fake in what way? Like that you're pretending that you're able to be social, but not? Or like saying something that's outright untrue?

There's a disorder called Avoidant Personality Disorder in which the person tends to have the belief that they're socially inept.. I guess they're not really, though, just think they are?
The autistic thing is more of a difficulty in comprehending the social situations, I think.. that and the feeling very removed from them.

Ready for a weird answer? YES! All the time! And I am. And I've worked hard for it and am a bit proud of it too! If you are AS and you EVER want to "fit in" with NT society (and I'm not saying you should, this is an individual choice), you will inevitably feel this way. There is no way around it. And let me be the first to tell you there is NOTHING WRONG WITH IT. I'm not manipulating to be evil. I'm not faking things to gain some advantage. I just want to be accepted. There is nothing wrong with that.



LOL, "reality"? Whose "reality"? I'm hard on myself, sure, but it's the only way I'm going to improve on fitting in. I kick my own ass when I mess up far worse than anyone else could! But overall you'll find, as you journey through this life, that "reality" is a highly subjective term