I agree with the others in that this method would probably fail. Firstly, you are being too direct. People like when you do things to establish a level of comfort with them, and this can be a very slow and gradual process. Feeling that you are obligated or pressured into being someone's friend isn't a good feeling.
What you could do instead is start by making a general comment with someone that you are in a common situation with and start a converstation based on this situation. For example, I had a nice chat today with a guy who was standing in the same line at the bookstore, and he started with "Gee, you're gloing to have a hefty bill!" because I was carrying about 7 big textbooks.
Introduce yourself after a few exchanges, and then talk about things like your programs and courses. Then after you've gone through a few topics, ask about possible activities you could do afterwards (such as "There's a coffee house coming up, are you going to that?"). Never, ever ask to be someone's friend, though. Social trust takes a while to build up, and you especially have to be careful at the aquaintance stage of friendship as this trust can easily be broken with a question like that.
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Given a “tentative” diagnosis as a child as I needed services at school for what was later correctly discovered to be a major anxiety disorder.
This misdiagnosis caused me significant stress, which lessened upon finding out the truth about myself from my current and past long-term therapists - that I am an anxious and highly sensitive person but do not have an autism spectrum disorder.
My diagnoses - social anxiety disorder and obsessive-compulsive disorder.
I’m no longer involved with the ASD world.
15 Sep 2010, 5:11 pm
