pensieve wrote:
People get annoyed with my behaviour.
Usually I say trying to act normal is lying to yourself and others but the people around with the most seem to find me so irritating I can't help think that they hate me.
It's weird. I don't know what I'm supposed to do around these people.
Should I just ignore them and remain the same?
Or should I try to be what they want?
Can't believe I'm asking this. I always say play up the autism. I just don't feel loved anymore.
It seems everything I says gets me yelled at.
I can't talk about any medical problem I have without getting called a hypochondriac.
Yet I still try to talk to these people.
These are people I can't get away from, family members, etc.
The thing is there are two kinds of thinking about what is going on here... it seems to me. There is OUR own personal story. And we all spend a whole lot of time going over that in our brains. Explaining it. Rewriting it. Organizing it. And there is what's going on in the world, and other people's stories. EVERYONE loves other people who can listen to other people's stories and give insight and encouragement. Just like Temple knew and could get into cow's brains, if you can get into the minds of those around you, rather than trying to get them into your story, then EVERYTHING will change in your world.
Thinking deeply about other people's needs is love. But wanting others to think about your story... and then they don't... that's a bad place to be.
Having problems is a maximum turnoff for most people. Ever hear the ancient blues song called Nobody Knows You When You Are Down And Out?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dy85lAKL ... r_embedded or just the other day in the news there was the story that when women cry, it is a total buzz kill for men.
Back when people rode horses to school, and I was a lad and attended my first college course in painting, I couldn't help but notice (and rejoice!) in the graffiti that was written high up the studio wall (the writer must have had wings!), "fake it til you make it."
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Everything is falling.