Better Communication Skills Sometimes?

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**Edit: changed title--hopefully to something better! **

Anyway, I am wondering if any of you who have prominent symptoms of ASD ever find them lessened around people you are really close to. I mean, you may find it difficult to communicate with the majority of people, but would you find it easier to speak more normally to a parent (or spouse, etc)? Or are your communication skills the same with everybody?

Last edited by littlelily613 on 25 Jun 2011, 12:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Much better the better I know a person.

I find it a lot easier to communicate with people I know.

I have a rule of thumb: if I have regularly mixed with the person for more than about 10 or 15 years, then I am comfortable with them. This includes several work colleagues, a number of friends where I live, and my immediate family. But just knowing someone's face a long time isn't good enough - I still don't know what to talk about - or I have to think quickly to come up with a topic of conversation (essentially I am play-acting a role and it is harder work and wears me out faster).

My symptoms are definitely worse when I'm around people I don't know well. I'm still awkward even with family members and close friends, but I don't notice it as much.

I want to say that I can speak more normally to people that I know, but what sort of symptoms are we talking about here, to be more specific?

I am far more comfortable talking to people I know well. There are also some people and certain situations where I can talk to people better. I'm not sure exactly what it is that makes some people easily to talk to, but with some specific people I find I become very self conscious about eye contact. One thing that I have noticed is that it becomes much worse when dealing with people who have power over me, ie. boss, doctor, dentist, selection panel in job interview, etc. In large group situations also. I need to be one on one.

Chicken and egg - do I converse better with people I know, or do I know people better if I can converse with them?

For me, the latter.

I "know" my brother but cannot converse with him. The people I can converse with and do interact with regularly I get to know well.

well, in my case, the 'visible' symptoms get worse the better i know a person.
this is becouse i know them and they know and accept i can be quirky, so i dont feel the 'need' to cover that up.

this is aside of the reduced anxiety around the same persons, but it probarbly relates to each other in a 2-way causality...

Well, these could be any symptoms. What I was thinking about mostly, though, is in regards to communication skills.

Anyway, more for everyone else too:

It is comforting to read all of these responses. I was 99.9% certain I was autistic, but there was always this teensy bit of doubt in the back of my mind because I do open up more with certain people than I do with others. I thought this might mean there was something else wrong with me instead, but it seems this is quite common so my doubts are gone. I get my (second set of) results back on the 8th anyway, so I will see what she has to say about it then as well.

Yes, I find this as well too. I feel more at ease amongst people who know me. I also do this more in places where it is more socially acceptable because people are more apt to understand me (ie. the psychologist, or the autism group I attend). That is the real me. The fake me cannot stay surfaced for long--and is still pretty abnormal by society's standards--but I do tend to try and hold back on most of my stims at, say, work.

Yes, I get this as well. I do converse better with people that I know (such as my parents); however, there are some people, no matter how well I know, I cannot converse well with. In some cases, I have to be able to converse with them for one reason or another to begin with. That is very rare for me.

I sometimes have moments with people I don't know well where my communication & other things are more like an NT than around people I know well. I think it may be because I'm paying more attention to being self-aware & things with people I'm not close to. I'm less guarded & caring with people I know well & am close to

I do better around people I know best. I am better able to understand where they are coming from and what they might be thinking and predict how they might react than I am just about anyone else.

My communication skills are much better if I am around people I am comfortable with or in a situation or surroundings I feel very confident in-- this is one of the things that saves me when I have to talk to design clients who are strangers. I know that in many ways, I am the one in command of the situtation, because I know a lot more about it than they do.

Nope. I'm a train wreck even with my family.