Food agression

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I personally have an issue with people, mostly men, touching or eating or even looking longingly at my food. There is not much else besides a sensory overload that can really make me as mad as this. However, if a female person, or someone who asks permission first takes my food then it doesn't bother me at all. Also, my boyfriend or father eating my food doesn't bother me. I know this is irrational, but I can't help but wonder if I'm not alone.

My boss is one of the main offenders in this issue. I don't know if it's because I am small or quiet that he thinks he can get away with it or maybe he thinks I don't plan to eat my food (which is silly, he sees how I eat). Either way I usually try to sit at the other end of the table or go to another one to avoid the situation. Still, he often seeks me out and says "Yum, what do we have here?" before sticking his hand into what's on my plate before I can say anything about it. I have been holding back for years, but today I unfortunately snapped at him in a public cafe.

Maybe next time I'll just take his food without asking and see how he likes it... if I still have a job tomorrow that is. lol

Your kaiser roll is a small price to pay for a job. But I can understand the defensiveness, food can be a calming part of any day.

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Last edited by nat4200 on 19 Apr 2012, 7:05 am, edited 1 time in total.

If someone eats my food without asking me first, you bet it makes me mad lol, I think that would make most anyone a little upset. However, if they ask me first I usually don't have a problem sharing, I just like to be respected enough to be asked rather than have someone simply take.

I'd be extremely mad. If someone touches my food it's now contaminated and I won't eat it. It would mean my whole meal is ruined. I don't like to share food from a plate with others.

One time at a fair people I was with were getting a big plate of some kind of chips. I didn't want to get my own because it was too much for one person to eat and maybe I wouldn't like them. When we asked for another plate they looked at us like we were crazy and gave us a tiny soda cup lid. I ended up not being able to have any.

I don't have such experience and really don't know how I'll act. I voted no mostly because I rarely get angry about anything. Though I generally don't mind people touching my food. I can't believe a grown man would do that. Maybe he's got issues with food? Like he's on a diet or something? Or maybe he's only doing it because you react strongly?

If it's me I'd eat something not yummy to him for a while (say, brown rice and a few spinach leaves) and offer it freely to him. He'll lose interest after a few times. Spicy, pungent or bitter food are especially effective. Say fermented cabbage with fish sauce. Chopped parsley with krill in a sandwich. Get creative and yucky. Whenever I announce that I'm having an "experimental cooking week" almost nobody want to even try my food. Man I really enjoy serving people things I call "brown blobs" or "white goo" or "mixed stuff". I'm a bit sadistic I guess.

Last edited by y-pod on 28 Feb 2012, 4:47 am, edited 1 time in total.

I don't like to eat out for that reason. It's not just that my food has been touched by someone else, people also permanently shed dead skin cells and other unsavory things that will of course get into the food. A hairnet doesn't cut it. If I have to eat someone's dead skin, I'd rather it be my own.

I also hate eating in company. Watching and hearing other people chew is almost as bad as watching someone take a dump. It's just a different step of the same process, which should be a very private matter imho. I can't really enjoy my food unless I have my privacy and eat something that I've prepared myself. But every now and then, I force myself to eat out in order to jog my immune system and inoculate myself against the latest flu viruses and whatever else the cook has sneezed into my meal.

Yes I most certainly do and anyone who tries it is likely to get my fork stuck in their hand Grrrrrrr lol
A lot of things surrounding food actualy make me very angry, when I'm hungry I get angry. If certain foods aren't prepared just how I like it then it feels wrong and I just can't enjoy it. I have a lot of "little quirky routines" revolving around food my wife tells me

So, there is a name for it.

I grew up in an environment in which taking food off of someones plate would start a serious altercation. To take food that was NOT on your plate without permission was to break one of many unspoken cardinal rules. It was almost as serious an offense as stepping on someones brand new white tennis shoes.

So, i really don't appreciate strangers or those I am unfamiliar with sampling food from my plate. The only exception are children (because i always think that they might be hungry). LoL.

TheSunAlsoRises

Boss: "Yum, what do we have here?" (reaches for food)
You: "A cold. Or maybe strep, my nephew had it last weekend when I visited him . . . " (continues rambling)
Boss: (puts food down and backs away)

I always ask, "Are you going to finish that?", "Can I have some?" or (At work) "I'm very hungry and I don't have any money and didn't get paid yet, would you mind sharing?" I'm quite a mooch at times.

I am the same way.

Thirded.

Today I went up to him and apologized for snapping at him yesterday. His response was this, "What? When did you snap at me? Is everything okay? Did I do something wrong?" Then I just didn't have the stones to remind him and told him never mind. My coworkers are all bothered by his food-snatching behavior too; they conjectured that he probably gets chastised for it so much that my words must have gone in one ear and out the other. However, later on that day as I was leaving for lunch he approached me and said "Hey, I have some extra fries, do you want some?" I responded with a polite, "No thanks, but it's very nice of you to offer." To my surprise, he began shouting at me in a jokingly stern tone, "WHAT? ARE MY FRIES NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU OR SOMETHING?" So I just kinda laughed awkwardly and left to eat my lunch alone somewhere else.

I'd honestly like to tell him why I think I might dislike him touching my food, but I don't feel comfortable opening up to him. I also don't think he could stop talking over me with his big man voice long enough to hear everything I have to say. He would probably make a joke halfway through my recounting of numerous nights in my childhood where I went to bed hungry. He'd probably be thinking about a youtube video while I told him about how kids would swarm me and take my lunch in high school as a joke. I doubt he would take me seriously when I told him of how I got so hungry after a while that I resorted to making one of my lunch-thieves eat dirt to make him stop. And like a fool, he probably thinks I'm skinny because I'm on a diet, not because I get paid less than he does, and can't afford groceries sometimes. ... When I think about these things, being underweight my whole life, having literally fought for some of my meals... and then I see his pudgy hand going towards my food... all of my childhood pain and anxiety suddenly has a face, and I really just want to punch the heck out of it.

There are only so many times I can ask someone not to do something that bothers me. I know he doesn't care. He thinks that I should change and he should continue eating my food which I purchased with my money.

Don't get me wrong. Aside from food things, he's a nice person. That's why it's even worse that I feel so defensive about this.

Last edited by Fern on 28 Feb 2012, 10:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Fern. That guy would annoy the hell out of me. Your patience is impressive. maybe you should poison your food sometime :twisted: and hope he pinches before you begin

He's just rude. It doesn't take an ASD to be offended by him.