asperger relationships

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has anyone on this forum waited a long time to find the ones they loved but were very stressed with all the years of waiting of feeling lonley depressed and unwanted by the world? according to statistics the highest divorce rate is amongst asperger people

Yes! I have! In fact it;s become so much of a Burden the last 2 years im on the anti-depressants because my mental state is very unstable.

I have had ONE relationship. With my husband. He is autistic too. I'm 38. I don't think I could ever form an intimate relationship with an NT. I went on a few dates with men before I met my husband (at age 23), none of which ever came to anything. He's the only sexual partner I've had.

I want to try and date an AS girl, i want to see if i would feel more happier and secure with somone i can relate to and someone who would understand me.

Its took 8 months, and various horrible moments, and occasional break ups and misunderstandings.

BUT me and an NT girl are very stable in the long run, she knows I'm different, she knows I'm 100% loyal, and after much difficulty understanding the "all or nothing" way I am with her, she finally trusts me.

We've had serious issues, fights, even violence... But in the end I knew, I just know I love her, I know she loves me..

I guess the moral of my story is, don't give up on NT's as a group, instead give up on people that use you, there are wonderful people everywhere.

A good example is my parents, my dad is aspie, my mum is NT, they've been together around 25 years

I wish i had your luck, sadly i don't know where to begin.

I've run into my relationship by accident! I was just saying hi to Starbuline one time, and then we got our MSN addresses. One month later, and Starbuline loves me more than life itself, and I'm on the fast track to catching up! The only trouble is that I'm in NZ and she's in California, but we're have the time of our lives nonetheless!

Wow, you did well then my friend

Don't I know it. Star's the coolest girl ever, you know. We can chat for an entire afternoon on MSN and not take a break for food! Okay, so maybe that's just the case on my end, but still, we're both itching to meet each other someday. It'll be the greatest moment of my life, I just know it.

I hope that day will come for you my friend, i wish you both well, and i hope i will find someone like that one day

Wherever AND whoever

She could be NT, AS, or anything under the sun... If you find someone you'll do anything for, and you trust that they'll do the same, treasure it.

I just hope when the time comes i will know, because im worried that because i am AS it will stop me being aware of it.

Its true, I'm lucky.. But I spent around 6-8 months fighting and bickering, constantly on the edge and trying to prove certain things to her she just didn't seem to understand.

After a while I realised the fighting is a result of one thing, she gets so attached to me she needs to push to get her own space, no matter what every single time she comes back, and if I treat the abandonment calmly KNOWING she is there, it turns out she always is!

I used to get angry, accusatory and jealous, granted my fears were founded in the fact that she couldn't be loyal to me in the way I needed, but eventually she understood why, and we're both trusting and loyal to each other.

AS + NT is an equation that can work! (the important word here being can)

Additional:

If it's any consolation dude, it took me 5 relationships, LOTS of heartache, to actually realise someone trusted me. Even with the most recent girl it wasn't an instant realisation, but something that hit me over a course of months, as I said to myself "Hey this girl keeps coming back!"

I don't have any friends because of the way I can only handle "all or nothing" in relation to others.

So I found someone that wants me and only me, she keeps her friends separate so thats not an issue, we spend 1-2 days a week together and thats more than enough for me.