Feeling like a victim/ Easily intimidated

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So I live in England for a week now (I'm actually from Germany) and yesterday I went to buy some stuff alone for the first time. Not only that I have a very bad sense of direction and didn't really know where to go or whether I'd be able to find my way back, a lot of things work slightly different (traffic lights, paying in shops...) and I suddenly was very afraid to act stupid/do something really wrong. I was so nervous that I forgot how to enter the building when I came back (it's a special key system) and a few people had to help me plus my nervousness almost made me mute and I probably came across as very impolite and stupid.

Also on the way I encountered a few groups of loud, possibly drunk men, and every time I kind of expected them to say something offensive or insulting, or to actually threaten me.. none did.. but I often feel like that, even back in my "own" country: that all people (especially when they're loud and extroverted) are basically threatening and hostile and will think me stupid or weird. Yeah my self esteem is pretty low.

I hate feeling like that because it makes me think of myself as weak and clumsy. Do you know what I mean?

i no exactly what you mean extroverted people freak me out usually ,i use to have an extroverted girlfriend u can guess how long that relationship lasted lol..

What really helped my self esteem was learning a martial art after I got severely beat up as a teen. At first I learned it so I wouldn't have to worry about getting so badly beat up but then I learned so much that I didn't want to use it and it gave me confidence that next time i'm in a fight I'll be able to actually do something about it.

Also, if you join a REAL dojo (No McBelts) they should teach you about prevention, recognizing a problem before it happens etc. Which I think would help for people like me who don't naturally pick up on people's intentions. Which would help with your anxiety. I have mild anxiety myself so I know what you're going through.

I get easily intimidated, and I brace myself for it too. For example, if I was to walk past a big group of teenagers, I would assume girls will laugh at me or glare, and boys will delibrately yell something in my face. Even if I try to act natural when walking past, 9 times out of 10 they do it, maybe because I expect it and they pick up on it, I don't know. Then again, teenagers used to do it even when I didn't expect it. I should just glare at them and think, ''God, how immature!'' But even if I do walk away thinking how awesome I am and that they're not 'cos they intimidated me, they don't know that I'm thinking that, they'll just feel proud of themselves for intimidating me, then I go around thinking, ''hmph, why me?!''

Yeah I know the feeling, it does suck especially out in public.

I feel like a victim AND a target (probably the same sort of thing). Also I take things too personally, like if a stranger happens to meet my eyes, I convince myself that they're staring at me to judge me, even though rationally I know that eye contact is a natural thing and that they're probably not thinking anything of me, but I still can't help feeling like I'm a victim.

Ya, its happened to me all of my life. I am very suggestable, I always figured it was because I really didn't have a preference anyway. But I have read in various places, no citations sorry, that AS are bad with executive control and can end up following orders without question from people. Maybe its from a desire to fit in. Maybe from fear. it's hard to say.

IDK about feeling like a victim, but I'm definitely easily intimidated. I know what to do in order to be more assertive, but I just can't seem to put it into practice in a lot of situations. I feel like Fluttershy from MLP a lot of the time.

I'm not as bad as I used to be with this, but I still get a bit worried when walking past groups of people. Most of the time I'll remind myself they're so wrapped up in their lives that they won't even notice me. I roll my shoulders back - a sign of confidence - and look where I'm going rather than at the floor or making eye contact with them.

I often forget what I'm doing/how to do simple things in supermarkets when paying. For instance earlier I went to a shop I like going in, but had a freakout last time I was there. I'd put my bike helmet in my bag and it got stuck when I was trying to get it out to put my purchases in. All the stuff the cashier was scanning was building up and I still didn't have my bag ready, so I panicked..but I remembered to tell myself it didn't matter and counted in my head. I got the helmet out and fumbled around paying a bit, but it was okay. Some other days I panic so much I screw up paying and they have to show me how and I walk out with armfuls of stuff rather than putting it in my bag because I can't work it out.

I guess you could say I feel intimidated by normal people, but it's largely because I'm used to being judged by them in some way, and I feel that it's a constant thing from just about everyone.

The kind of intimidation that denotes fear of ones safety however, is a bit different for me. When I feel fear of my safety in any way, I tend to get VERY primal (I never used to be that way though), so it's not a good idea to back me into a corner.

Amphetamines fix this entirely for me. Even if someone does try to bully me, so what? I'm a glowing god who might as well be 12 feet tall, the way he impresses mere mortals. Well, they make me feel that, and that's the important thing.

Jaden, I don't want to sound like a psycho, but have you thought of purchasing an illegal, concealable knife? I carry (a legal) one everywhere in America, and I feel very secure knowing I could eviscerate anyone who looks at me the wrong way ( which is directly in the eyes of course).

Sometimes, a crime just needs to be comitted, and that time is all day every day when the crime is Londoners carrying knives to gut chavs with.

@buttoneater
lol nope, I've thought about that, i tend to try to be more zen.
Generally I stay home due to my agoraphobia, my latest nervousness is probably due to the break-ins from last year (like 6 in 2 months), i don't think I've gotten past it.

I used to feel that way. I started "faking it". Walking, talking, moving, etc like I have confidence and self esteem. I would find pick someone on tv or someone I knew who was confident and well liked, but not outrageous or anything, and I would pretend I was her. I'd walk like her, talk like her, completely pretend I was her. If someone gave me a funny look, I'd pretend it was her they gave the look to, etc. The more I did that the easier it became and the more confident I became. Eventually the pretending to be somebody else just stopped without me noticing it and I actually had some confidence.

I gained more over the years, especially about not being intimidated. That requires a different strategy. For that, I made myself start speaking up. I started standing up to people, easier people first like maybe a stranger working in a store that I never have to see again. Do it in small steps and congratulate yourself every time you do it. For me, starting out with customer service people on the phone was the easiest. Once I learned to argue back with them on the phone, I started putting that into practice in real life. It takes time and effort and it's hard at first and scary, but it's doable and you will feel so much better about yourself once you learn to do that.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
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It happens to me A LOT and i thought it could only happen in my country. I feel threatened all the time but sometimes i answer back to them or show my middle finger. And it makes me thinking about the incident all day. It is very embarassing... i guess people were right when they told me i'm too negative.

I walked past a group of teenage boys today, on my way to the bus station. None of them shouted anything or said some sort of smutty remark or anything like that, they just walked by quietly, but I felt them all look my way as I passed, and unless they were looking at the houses that were in my direction, they were all looking at me. Yes, it might be a compliment, but I doubt it because I wouldn't say I'm beautiful, I actually looked a bit dishevelled because I had just come out of work and felt tired and hungry and thirsty and a bit dehydrated. So they were probably all gawking at me on purpose to intimidate.