I used to stim excessively as a child. This led to me being bullied by peers and constantly corrected by family, teachers, etc. Around middle school I became very good at feigning NT behaviors and pretty much quit all stimming. At around this time (particularly 8th grade) I began to have constant high levels of anxiety and even some high energy mania, anger,irritability. I have been like that since and am now 19 in art school. My first year was extremely stressful and I found myself losing control of myself at times with compulsions like smoking excessively and eating. This year things are no different. I have read so much about stimming and the relief it gives some on wrong planet. Should I start stimming again? I try to do it but all those years of constant repression make it very painful. I feel afraid, like the world is watching. I fear it like death and it keeps me from doing the things that I think would make me more functional and relaxed, just as I was when I was younger. Has anyone had any success in a similar scenario?
Last edited by fluxus on 29 Oct 2012, 6:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.
29 Oct 2012, 2:44 am
