Friends Outgrowing You?

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As you are all aware, Aspies occasionally have the tendency to come off as less "mature" than their friends, especially in adolescence; we aren't usually into the whole going out partying thing, or the experimental drugs, alcohol,etc, and that can make us stand out. Well, this was never really a problem for me until recently (my friend generally found my naivete and rule-bound behaviour to be, for lack of a better word, "cute".) Recently though, she's been distancing herself from me it feels like, throwing parties that go on late into the night and involve alcohol (we're only 19) almost as if she knows that will convince me not to come. I guess I made kind of a nuisance of myself at her last party; I didn't want to hang out at the park with them after dark because that's against the law in my town, and I insisted on going back to the house, and I'm not sure, but I feel like I might have embarrassed her by looking like such a baby in front of these apparently attractive boys she'd invited. Anyway, long story short, for the past several weeks she's been making plans with me then finding excuses to cancel them at the last minute, case in point, we were supposed to go trick or treating together for Halloween last night, but it wasn't until twenty minutes after she was supposed to show up that I texted her and she told me she couldn't make it. I wonder if after eight years of friendship she's finally starting to outgrow me and get tired of my "immature" ways. What do you guys think? What should I do about it?

Seems like it, My friend of 10 years and I did the same thing. He had these excuses for everything. Started hanging out with a group of people he enjoyed more then me. He tried having me spend time with his new group but I just conflicted too much. Not so much them as him when he's around them. He's completely fake, he would try and come off as some hard ass and they would eat it up like candy. I would laugh thinking he was joking and sometimes tell funny stories of things that happened to us and he would get mad at me.

After him ignoring me a lot more then usual and my trying to do everything I could to keep being his friend I decided to stop. It takes 2 people to form a friendship and if one isn't holding up their end it's only a matter of time before it sinks. People your age out grow each other it's pretty normal. I myself never changed at all during school, I never went through phases etc. I don't know if that's the same with you but It made it easy for what friends I actually had to leave. Because they decide one day they want to pick up smoking, or they're into sports and you're a nerd. Or they want to be envied and you're the only person in the group that knows their true colors.

I would let her go. People sometimes outgrow their friends and it happens. It even happens with NTs too. Their interests change and they stop being friends because they have nothing in common. I hear it's rare for people to still be friends with someone from their childhood. People who marry in high school, most of them end up in a divorce later on in life and it's rare for them to still be together from their teens.

Or you can just keep hoping this all blows over an things are back to normal again or you can confront her and ask her if she really is tired of you and doesn't want to be friends anymore. She could lie to you and say nothing is wrong or she could be honest about it.

It happened to me several times. It feels like I don't get any older (emotionally) and everyone else does. However, waiting for things to blow over worked in the past. Usually they come back if they are sick of pretending to be something they aren't.