Affection and other ties

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Empathy, god, transcendence, immortality, sympathy, politeness, courtesy, correcteness, love, blood bond, solidarity, community, compassion, closeness, kindliness, mutual fondness, tenderness.

Love: seems the thing we all want most, but be cautious: love is often absurdly magnified by attraction, and attraction is the procduct 70 % of good looks, and only a little piece by other factors, like brilliance, education, good taste, elegance. There is unfortunately absolutely no relationship whatsoever between character and good looks. I know this for sure.

What has god (or God, if you like) has to do with all the other things? Well, I don’t believe in a personal god (God), father god, mother god (I would prefer the latter anyway). But god (God) has something to do with the unconditioned absolute bond between mother and child, with the affection that runs (not always) among kin. Blood bond is something more that is added to a relationship, something that, when it exists, is not the product of any human manipulation. I discovered late in my life that, while there was no physical attraction between my sister and me (we never hugged, and this now I regret), while at first, when we were children, I nearly hated her and imagined that I would have liked her to disappear, there was later something special between us. And, well, I regret now that we never hugged.

This for now. I am exhausted by holydays.

Yes blood ties are something very special. I do not consider myself to be a violent person, but I know from past experience that if someione threatens my family, I could be driven to violence and probably murder if the situation warrented it.

long-term friendships, too-I have a grand total of three friends who I have simliar affection to as my family-similar depths of affection and strength . For these select threeI would go above and beyonsd normal efforts for just casual friends. One I have known 16 years, another 10 years, and the third for five years. The longer I've known them, the stronger the affection. There are things I would tolerate from this friend that I would not tolerate from my friend of 5 years, but there are things I would do for my friend of 5 years that I would not take from a friend of 1 year.

JulieArticuno

Why am I dissecting and analyzing about relationship? Because it’s the only way to have some contact with experiences which are structurally denied to me. I would like to live in the fluent vicinity of others. Not physical vicinity, although the possibility to exchange glances, to touch and to talk in an emotionally rich way to other people is tied to physical vicinity. This being denied to me I spent all my life studying community, communication, sociality to understand what was going wrong. When I began this explorations there was only psychoanalysis, unfortunately a totally misleading instrument, a form of delirous affabulation, soon to become the basis for the foundation of a sect.