Pushed around by total strangers?

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I had a really weird experience on the way home from work involving some people I've never seen in my life before.

I needed to use the cash machine. A man was already using it, and I went and stood at the edge of the privacy box behind him to wait my turn.

Three women had been hovering around talking about 6 paces away (yes, I actually paced out the scene afterwards, I was so annoyed/freaked out by what had happened). As the man finished and left, the three of them descended on me with a loud "Excuse me!" and two of them barged straight in front of me. The third woman went, "Excuse me, I was behind them," and barged in front too.

As usual in such circumstances I went mute and couldn't think of anything to say.

The pavement kind of widens out into a sort of square at that point in the street, and it isn't unusual for people to stand around there while they wait for the bus etc. Furthermore, these people were NOT in a line, they were in a group talking, and not facing the cash machine. As I mentioned, they were a good 6 paces away.

A couple of questions arise.

1. Could I have missed some really subtle signal that they were waiting in line (despite their lack of facing the machine, lack of what I would consider appropriate proximity if they were indeed waiting, and no obvious line), OR did these people take me for a complete sucker and this was just an opportunistic act?

2. Since this wouldn't be the first time I was treated as if I were (a) invisible, (b) had lesser rights than other people, or (c) had done something wrong, what signals or body language could it be that strangers are seeing/interpreting?

I doubt you missed a signal. They probably treat everyone like that. Some people are just self-centered jerks.

EDIT: I imagine they thought their claim to the spot was more obvious than it was, probably because they were egotistical types. It is easy to attribute every awkward moment to AS but there are some that come down to other people being rude.

I often feel invisible. In this case they sound like horrible selfish people and I am sure you did nothing wrong. If it is any consolation, I would have reacted like you - speechless and then analysed the whole thing whereas we should just accept some people are not nice and move on.

If they were 6 paces away and engaged in conversation amongst themselves vs. obviously waiting in line to use the machine, then anyone could have made the same mistake you did of not realizing they were waiting for the machine. It's them who made the social error of being rude to you by barging into line and saying, "Excuse me!" as if you should have known they were in line even though nothing about their position relative to the machine/line or body language etc indicated that. They should have politely said excuse me and stated that they were in fact waiting to use the machine and apologized for not paying attention and waiting in an appropriate place that would have indicated to others that they were in line, and asked if you minded if they used the machine first. But some people are just rude and not worth your time or energy to argue with, soooo just let 'em do their thing and bugger off into their self absorbed lives. IMO there's no sense in beating yourself up about missing a social cue that they failed to deliver in spectacular fashion. Also, don't worry about being walked all over either - as sometimes it's just better, safer, easier & quicker to just let rude people do their thing so they piss off faster vs. confronting them about it and then potentially escalating it into an argument or worse. Should you find yourself in a similar situation in the future and feel it's appropriate to speak up, then just stand your ground and say so - as sometimes rude people need a wake up call. Tell 'em they're welcome to use the machine when you're finished with it, and if they wanted to use it ahead of you they really should have been standing somewhere near it in line to use it.*

*so long as you haven't misread their standing far from it as a politeness to the current user. I often stand quite a distance from ATM's while waiting so that whoever is using them doesn't think I'm trying to look over their shoulder at their pin, or doesn't feel uncomfortable grabbing & pocketing cash while I'm standing behind them. *I* know I'm a good guy, but all they know is that I'm 6'2, the better part of 200lbs, wearing a touque & a hoody and can sometimes look like someone they don't want to interact with - especially since I know I tend to avoid eye contact with people... doing the math and putting 2 and 2 together, chances are pretty good that I could easily be mistaken for someone shady looking to rob them. Knowing that I remove my hood, and sometimes touque, and stand a significant distance away so that there's no confusion on their part.

Laugh like you just watched them break one of their rules, which you did. and say something like "Kaaaaay, children!" or any other applicable and biting thing you have loaded. Pointing out childish behavior is very easy to do, it's almost universal because they're the one who have made a scene. You didn't say anything and were in line, literally.

There's three ways it can go - you've got the final insult, much more considerable in their eyes than yours, and you've lost however long it takes them. feign taking pictures with your phone or hold it as though you could, act like you're trashing them publicly. Embarass.

They may get confrontational - You were in a bank, so it'd be a good time to say something like "ok push it you baby, I can ask for the tape later and the people can see what a twit you are" The keys here are -subtly as possible- presenting a defense (them being tards on camera), shrugging off the insult, and again, you're not offended - they're now YOUR joke. My trick is to hold my phone so i could take pictures of them, and cast one or two glances while i send a bs text to a buddy, with a very faint half-smile. This UNNERVES them, they're probably gonna turn around and be quiet. Repeat the pattern of "you look stupid". If confrontation ensues to violence then refer-to-how-to's

Yes these ladies/girls were pushy kind of semi-bullies who sensed your weakness and swooped down on you.

Yes it is your body language. I used to be the continual bully magnet. And I mean every day.

I figured out body language that made me appear imposing and almost alarming/threatening in demeanour. It has worked wonders. People shy away and I can push people away or make them cross a street with this cool body language awesomeness. POWR!

I agree with you 100 percent. I think people overgeneralise too much on here about the differences with Aspies and NTs, which makes Aspies believe that NTs are all these selfless perfect human beings and Aspies are the flawed ones, which causes self-doubt. I try to believe that not everything other people do is attributed to me being ''a little bit odd''. They probably haven't even noticed you, they're just being odd themselves.

I remember a few months ago in the library I was using a computer with my friend, and when we got up after we finished using it, we were getting up and getting our coats on, and a woman just appeared right close up next to me, practically shoving me out of the way and trying to get into my seat as though she was so desperate to get on to the computer so quickly. I got upset aswell as annoyed, but I tried not to blame myself for her odd behaviour. I knew I wasn't ''missing any subtle cue''. She was just in some sort of rush, being a bit rude at the same time and not waiting a few minutes for her turn.

I think the timing annoys me more than the actual situation. I always think ''trust me to be here at this moment at the same time as this particular person having to be in this particular mood at this moment''. They always say timing is everything.