Do I have Aspergers?

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Hi, newbie here looking for some help!

Went to the doctors yesterday morning and been referred to a Neuropsychologist to get a diagnosis as she believes I have Aspergers.

I am just looking for some help in understanding whether i could really have it as it seems like something other people have instead of me!. Maybe my views of it are also not correct so that could be not helping me.

I am 33 and I think I have always been seen as happy go lucky though with the odd bought of gloominess here and there. Truth is that I am incredibly shy and struggle to make conversation with people. When I was younger at school I always moved in large crowds and would appear popular but the reality was that I was more on the outskirts of these and was never close friends with anyone in the group.

Same in my late teens/early twenties, had a group of friends I would meet in the pub etc but was never really close to any of them, they were just the only people I knew.

I have always been really anxious about things (everything!) and am painfully shy with new people or groups of people. i don't like eye contact either.

I find myself getting stressed really easily and not coping with things well. I don't deal with noise well at all and if 2 things are happening at once around me I just can't think straight and have a 'mini meltdown' over it

had a lot of food issues throughout my life. When I was very young I was told I was fussy and this was taken to extremes and I was regularly punished for it. My memories of it are that the build up to mealtimes becomes very anxious moments for me and I just found it all very uncomfortable. in my teens I ended up with eating disorders and now I am older that is not around but i am quite strict about what I do and don't eat

I spend a lot of time on my own and am kind of happy like that. I have a girlfriend and a daughter but my gf has always been good at leaving me to my own thing a lot of the time, we work well together as she likes her own space too which is good.

I am not someone who is outwardly emotional. I tend to keep everything to myself and don't like to share my thoughts or feelings yet once in a while it all comes out like an explosion.

I have a real urge to learn all the time and spend most of my spare time reading books or just researching subjects on the net. I have at times been described at someone who is full of useless yet interesting information! I also find a real connection with music and spend a lot of time listening to stuff that usually no one else has ever heard of (I am kind of anti-fashionable, just seem to hate doing things that others like)

There is probably more I could say but have already rambled a lot. Just looking for some reassurances I think. Finding out I have Aspergers I think would make me feel better about how I (don't) cope with things as I know there is a reason as I give myself a hard time about it and get quite down but then just hearing myself say that I might have it sounds weird. these things are meant to happen to other people.

I took the AQ test and it came out at 28

To put it bluntly if a trained psychologist believes you have Asperger's you probably do. Your symptoms do sound like ASD, anyway.

If you want to go ahead with the diagnosis, then do so, but if everything you have said is true, then you may have it.
Being shy can come from many things, including losing confidence about communicating with people after being made to feel you have done it wrongly.(so it does not mean you have it) The fact that you have managed to blend into a crowd does not mean you don't have it, just that you have learned to play the part.
The food fussiness, the liking to be alone, the dislike of noise, the stress when too much is happening at once, the strong interest in learning all sound like things many have talked about on this site.
You can look around the site and find links to tests you can take that may give you an idea, but it still won't be a diagnosis.
Many people on this site are self-diagnosed and don't feel the need to pursue a formal diagnosis, so if you choose not to, you can still participate.

Man, I can't concentrate on this email, my son has been non-stop interrupting me for the past hour!

So, G'day!

Thanks SB7

Just a little confused by it all at the moment really. On one hand I think to myself how can I has AS when I have lead a 'normal life' i.e got a job, house, gf, child etc and from the outside it probably seems like everything is rosey but in reality I live with axiety every day and find it stressful to do a lot of things.

Feels like if anyone found out they would think I was making it up as I have spent my life pretending everything is fine as I am embarassed at how I don't cope so well.

Not sure I will tell anyone about it apart from my mum which will be tricky. She is very black & white and while she knows about the food issues and knows I have always been nervous and anxious about things I think it will come as a bit of a surprise. I think she might even dispute it.

I only found out a couple of months ago, and I am 45. My university told me after I participated in a study which required aspies vs NT's. The test designed to confirm that I was NT (neurotypical) showed that I was not.

I know what you mean about telling people. I have told some people that really don't matter as a way to 'test the waters', since whatever reaction they had would be telling, yet not matter since I would never see them again (such as in a psyc class). So far, no real dramas.
I told a friend who is not connected to anyone else I know, and I felt she thought I was seeking attention or something.

My mum looked at me strangely when I told her, and I saw that she always had it at the back of her mind that something was up with me. My sisters both were glad when I told them, because now they knew I wasn't just out to ruin everyone's good time when I said I didn't want to go to whatever social event was happening. I had a real reason. I think they will be more understanding in the future.

I am really glad I now know this because I have stopped beating myself up for not doing certain things like everyone else. I am not like everyone else, so I no longer feel compelled to shove a square peg into a round hole. I now am going to find out what my rights are in the university environment, and in the workforce I expect to enter in a few months, and also face and understand my limitations. I expect to be able to make better, more realistic choices now that I have given myself permission to accept my weaknesses.
I am married, have kids, a house, and have done a lot of things like run a weekend market stall, so it is possible to do stuff and be an aspie. Not all of us struggle the same way, or amount.

I would like to say your Mum will understand, and maybe she will surprise you, but I have no idea about that. Mum's are human, and sometimes they need to grow to understand things - they don't always happen by magic. But I hope she responds in an accepting way. Maybe you should mentally be prepared for any response before you tell her, just in case she is not ready to accept it. Mums have a habit of blaming themselves for everything to do with their kids. After all, we do make thousands of decisions which affect you one way or another. Maybe she will need your understanding too.
Tell her Einstein and Van Gogh were aspies! Many of humanity's greatest minds were aspies. It does not have to be seen as a bad thing in every case.

Hi Biscuitman

I know exactly what you're going through. I'm 27 and just a few months ago through self diagnosis found out I'm an aspie. I've learnt to imitate people around me and just go with the flow, so I'm on the outside and no one notices me. I do act as though everything is fine but inside there is a raging war that I can't stop. I hide myself away and keep to my self but when my emotions explode people better pray to god there not on the receiving end.

I'm always nervous, anxious, confused in social situations, I am fussy with food and don't like to be hugged or comforted by other people. I am going for a formal diagnosis so I can prove to people I'm not just making it up for attention but it's real and this is me.

I hope you keep being your self and do what's right for you.