Looking at other people and being jealous...

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...of their talents.

Does anyone else do this?

I'm not merely on about people who are like you but who maybe have a special skill, and I'm not really on about famous people either. I'm on about people you meet who clearly seem to have a lot of capabilities, and are very open, friendly and honest and clearly have capabilities far beyond what you have. You don't even feel able to talk to them, because you know that you will be shown to have no social skills or not the same intelligence. That sense of feeling like a fraud in life, a plastic, not feeling 'real'. Having the feeling that looking at someone else's life on a TV screen is more interesting than living your own, because you actually do very little independently.

What I'm on about is partially an inferiority complex (but, in a sense, is justified), partially a fear of others and partially a realisation that you don't even have the basic social skills to match up with these people.

Can anyone understand what I mean?

It's for the most part an emotional mindset.

Envy is created when you feel you are like someone else, therefore should have what they have.

Not many people are envious of say the pope.

If you realize that no matter what your emotions tell you, you cannot be like that person you'll rarely feel ency.

I think I know what you mean, but I don't think there are many people like that. They are rather a special minority. So, while I do feel envious of them, I don't feel too bad about myself in that sense. The majority of the people around me are as boring and useless as I am. In terms of social skills, I'm really hopeless, but I don't really blame myself for that.

Yes, Tequila, I can relate quite a great deal. Loath as I am to admit this I've experienced these feelings myself as well. Being jealous of another person because they're 'more skilled' at something, perhaps most especially when it's something I'm good at or want to be good at myself. Of coure, the remedy is to switch attitudes and invoke your admiration of the person instead (provided that they're cool about their abilities and prowess, and not arrogant/conceited or something). Partly to give them their due props, and partly because that way you can aslo learn something from them when talking to them.

I think, in my case, part of the reason for feeling jealous/envious of people who are 'better' at some things than I am, whether it's something I'm interested in or not, is because I have a rather big fear of failure. When I'm doing good, I feel fine, but when I have a slip-up, however little, my self-confidence can get crushed pretty easily. So in the presence of someone who is a lot more adept than I am, I can sometimes feel a bit intimidated... but I immediately tell myself that it's silly. It's an insecurity issue for me.

i find that avoiding watching reality tv and other neurotypical claptrap helps to avoid this negativity.

I envy other peoples' success sometimes but not often

Generally I know that a lot of successful people work hard to gain their success and as I'm pretty lazy that's why I'm not like them!

Life is easier for some people than others but I think there's usually a downside to most peoples' lives ie no one's life is perfect

I'm not really interested in success per se, more in people who create or discover original things that advance society
This might bring them success or it might not but it's the achievement that's the main thing to me

I don't feel the need to mix with successful people hence I don't need to worry about having good social skills

I'm a relatively low achiever but not embarrassed about it

I get stuff done that needs to be done to continue living my life and I try and help others where I can so I'm relatively satisfied with my life

If I put more effort in I'd get more done but I don't have a 'go-getting' energetic type of personality so I prefer not to

I'm a plodder basically

There's certainly no shame in it - we plodders are good on sticking to the task and loyalty

Not really.

Everyone is good and bad at stuff, and there's several billion different forms of that good and bad combination. Some are better at more things, some are bad at most things, some are good at one thing, some are this and that, and etcetera,. No combination is better than the other overall as there's far too many variables in life to determine such.