What kind of help could benefit me best?

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as some of you know, im a diagnosed HFA/AS but, ironically, i am also, in a way, very very low functioning. i can do very very little for myself for small amounts of time. this has been a problem that has crippled me my entire life. All i can do right now is take showers on my own and dress myself. anything else will either result in a meltdown or depression.

i worry for my furture, im turning 17 in 9 days and i know one day my dad wont be there to help me, and ill have to get a job. what kind of help should i get to maintain a balanced structured life and avoid meltdowns and depression.

I will be turning 40 this year and I only got my diagnosis last year.

I was 17 when got my first job it lasted 5 months until I was fired.
From 17 to 23 I was in job after job and they would only last a couple of months until they would fire me.

At 23 I got a job that lasted my until I was 37 the job closed.
I had learned how to do the work but I was bullied for the whole time in that place.

I have only stated the process of learning to drive in the last 6 months and I still live at home having never been in a relationship or had any friends.


You want to know a trick I learned that you should apply to you life right now?

Take it one day at a time don't stress yourself and don't think of the rest of you life as one big problem.

Break you problems down into individual ones.

Work on what you can one at a time.

the functioning levels arent changeable like that, what the 'low functioning' spectrum refers to is a IQ under a certain lower point [differs depending on whether its the DSM or ICD] and this has a knock on effect on how we experience autism [ie,a lot of language and communication issues,basic personal care difficulties,toileting issues,significant education difficulties,significant understanding difficulties etc] and life.

for example,ever read about executive dysfunction? it coud be moderate or severe with things like the depression or low confidence/self esteem making it feel even worser.
an autistic whose executive functioning is screwed will struggle to cope when they get overloaded.

thats not what i ment, i ment i have trouble taking care of myself and functioning in the outside world

You have to start with where you are, accepting it as real and something to fight, directing your frustration into action and not against yourself. I haven't mastered that part, but that's what I think is important---to accept where you are as real, get and feel frustrated enough to fight for more for yourself, but without hating yourself in the process.

As for what kind of help, I have taken anything I could along the way because people who want to help, they have something to offer. Usually it's helpful.

I did lose out recently with a professional who wanted to help me and just did not and kind of things getting worse for me. And it was hard to walk away, but I knew I had to, and now things are getting slowly better for me. I don't think it matters where you find them but someone who will push you to be your best without pushing you into falling apart worse and who knows how to help make things happen and believes you can grow. You seem so smart it breaks my heart to think of you struggling this way. But I know you have to struggle to find some way right now. It might be an educational program, counselor, job coach, the other thing is it will probably take more time than many people need. And that just is the way it is. People seem to love you here---you can get that for yourself in the world I really believe!

With various home skills. talking to an Occupational Therapist may be of an advantage to see what skill you are capable of learning. I'm in the same position of being unable to cook, clean the home, laundry and other living skills due to exhaustion and sensory overload associated with those tasks as well as risks in regards to dangers with slipping etc. an OT may not be able to help, but can talk to you about your limitations and what skills you need to work on around your ASD.

If there are skills that cannot be learned and after a Risk Assessment from OT means there is significant danger to your well-being, you can be referred to Social Services for caring advice (if you are receiving DLA care component or the PIP care component) , from there on you can be referred to other council service departments.

Well that's what's avaliable in Britian's NHS and Local Council Social Services. I wouldn't know if that's available elsewhere in the world.

If you are 17 and can't do things on your own there are two things you can do that will require some work on your part. 1 is that when you turn 18 you can go down to the social security office in your state and apply for disability. You will need to present documentation, schedule an interview (unless you go down there very early you could get in that day), and after you are approved you can be assigned a caseworker I believe. Keep in mind this is for the states so if you live in Canada or the UK, I can't help you there. Anyways, even if you don't want to go on disability and be labeled as unfit to work it's still a good idea to go down there, get your diagnosis in record there (I just found out about this myself recently) so that if you have future problems you will have a paper trail to make things easier.

Another option you have is to see a Psychologist and / or Autism group and try to learn coping and lifestyle methods. You mentioned depression and that's why I think you could actually strengthen some of your weaker basic living skills if you confront the big depression. I'm obviously know expert but I was married to someone who suffered from devastating clinical depression (divorced now) who couldn't function at work, at home, or even take care of herself because of her depression. You'll always have meltdowns and struggle due to Autism but if depression is also getting in the way alleviating that or attempting to might actually help.

Also, don't take my advice as the ultimate truth. Explore all your possibilities, research, and ask questions. That's the only way you will find what is best for you. good luck

Have you considered taking up nighttime employment or study, and sleeping during the day? I do this because sunlight and brightness causes stress. I also joined a 24 hour gym and go there when no ones about. This eliminates enough of my anxiety that I can do most of what I need to do.
Maybe you should purchase weapons if you want to do this though.