Why is it soo horrible to say "Shut Up"?

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CleverKitten
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03 Apr 2009, 1:13 pm

Saying "Hush" and "Shhhh" and "Be quiet" are perfectly fine, but saying "Shut Up" is just such a horrible thing, apparently! But don't they all mean the same thing?

I know that "Shhh" is starting to become an impolite thing now, because it was used so frequently, as an alternative to "Shut up". :roll:
If "Hush" were used so frequently, would it, too, become a 'bad' thing to say?



I am asking this because recently, my fiance's little brother was being very annoying. While I was trying to work on a project, he kept spouting off all this stupid sarcasm and jokes (And, as an Autie, I dislike sarcasm and jokes, and he knows this.)

I told him, "I am busy working on this right now and I would like to be left alone."
So I took my project into my room and closed the door so I could work on it quietly. (I was trying to figure out how to build a Macro Photo Studio out of pvc pipes.) He opened the door, stood at the doorway, and continued talking and talking, as if he hadn't heard me at all!

So finally, I told him, "For goodness sakes, will you just shut up!"
And then with a hint of hurt in his voice, he said, "Jeez, fine!" and ran away crying to his mother, and proceeded to tell her that I told him to "Shut up." He was actually crying!

And then his mother came in and sternly told me that "Shut up" is a bad and hurtful thing to say, and to use words like "Hush" or "Be quiet" instead.
Never mind how annoying and rude little brother was being! :x


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redplanet
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03 Apr 2009, 1:24 pm

They do mean the same thing, but "shut up" is much more harsh than the other phrases. It's also more emotional, ie it indicates you're feeling very angry when you say it. The other phrases" are generally kinder and more gentle. Your finance's brother had a shock when you said "Shut up" because of the emotion in the words.



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03 Apr 2009, 1:28 pm

Keep in mind that I'm bad with words and I bet I would have done the same thing in your situation.

I honestly think that the phrase "shut up" is just an informal phrase and impolite to strangers. My guess is that older people (including moms) might believe that it's negative or hateful, especially toward children. I wouldn't tell it to anyone at work, unless I'm close to them and kidding around. I wouldn't normally tell it to a kid for the same reason I wouldn't casually curse to a kid.* I would, however, tell it to my friends, boyfriend and family (cuz they can tolerate that sorta thing).

*Basically, the only reason(s) I wouldn't casually tell a kid curse words is because society doesn't normally appreciate kids who use curse words and I don't want to be held responsible for teaching them. The same is about the same for "shut up."



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03 Apr 2009, 1:29 pm

Because it's is usually said...

"SHUT UP!! !"

... rather than, "Would you shut up, please?"


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03 Apr 2009, 1:34 pm

Fnord wrote:
... rather than, "Would you shut up, please?"

That is still probably considered rude to some... I guess it depends on your tone and who you're talking to. It's tough for me to explain right now because I'm on the phone.



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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03 Apr 2009, 1:39 pm

I used to say "shut up" and got into trouble for it. I was told it was rude and not a nice thing to say to people. Others could say "shut up" and no one cared. What gives? That's what drives me crazy. If it's okay for some to say "shut up" and no one cares, then everyone should be allowed access to the shut up command, imo.



silentbob15
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03 Apr 2009, 2:31 pm

There are better ways to ask people to shut up, the way and tone of voice used by most people is to harsh.
Asking someone "Quiet Please" works.



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03 Apr 2009, 3:57 pm

It reminds me of how when people type swears, they replace one letter with an asterisk, like s*it or f*ck, I never understood that. You're saying the word, it's blatantly obvious what word you're saying, nothing's really hidden by that one star, but to type the word which you actually mean to say is for some reason incredibly rude, so you have to say the exact same word but apparently make it appear that you don't know how to spell it.



03 Apr 2009, 4:02 pm

"Shut up" is a stronger word for saying "Be Quiet" "Hush" etc. so saying "Shut up" gets their attention because it's more harsh. I only say it when people don't listen when I tell them to so I move onto saying "shut up."



Kilroy
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03 Apr 2009, 4:04 pm

its humans stupid thinking that certain sounds can form into a bad thing

any word can be used badly
go spoon yourself fork and knife!

but f**k is bad and fork is good
sound pretty much the same
not spelled very differently
so why is f**k bad
why is any word bad or good?



Josie
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03 Apr 2009, 4:20 pm

my mom is from south africa and shut up is considered a swearword there



03 Apr 2009, 4:28 pm

Josie wrote:
my mom is from south africa and shut up is considered a swearword there




What? You hear that word in Disney movies and they are rated G such as 101 Dalmatians and the animated movie and The Aristocats.



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03 Apr 2009, 4:37 pm

But it's the evil villains that typically say them. :(

I honestly don't believe that words inherently have "bad" or "good" connotations to them; it's completely a societal thing. I don't understand it, and from my experience, it tends to go away with people in their 30s and 40s. I think really old people even curse every so often, and I've seen plenty of them yell "Shut up!" to their dogs.

I think it also depends on the area you live in. In the slums, it's "OK," but in fancy areas (middle-class, upper-class), it might actually be considered ...evil. Also depends on the religion of people. These are just my observations, and nothing proven.



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03 Apr 2009, 4:51 pm

I wouldn't tell anyone to "shut up" because it is harsh, it's rude and it's definately a rebuff.

I particularly dislike hearing parents telling children to "shut up". :(



03 Apr 2009, 5:15 pm

My mother told us kids to shut up all the time. :(



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03 Apr 2009, 5:58 pm

CleverKitten wrote:
Saying "Hush" and "Shhhh" and "Be quiet" are perfectly fine, but saying "Shut Up" is just such a horrible thing, apparently! But don't they all mean the same thing?


They don't mean the same thing. They all convey "I would like you to be quiet". But "Shut up" also conveys "I'm bothered, angry, frustrated, or annoyed".

And sometimes conveying those emotions along with the "I'd like you to be quiet" message is appropriate. It's not horrible; it's communication. But sometimes it can feel horrible to the person on the receiving end.