Coming out as Autistic on Facebook

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I'm planning to come out on my Facebook as being Autistic. I have given it a lot of thought and I do believe that it's the right thing to do for my situation. So by the end of this week, 560+ family members, childhood friends, co-workers, neighbors, acquaintances, and complete strangers will know about it. I have made up my mind and do not plan to change it.

I do, however, have problems finding the right words to use in my post. I would greatly appreciate if anyone here would be willing to share what they wrote in their "coming out" letter/post. Yes, I would like to steal some ideas from you!

If you feel that is right for you then go for it. I personally would never want others to know how damaged and broken I am.

I never felt the need for any generic proclamation, but if you feel it's right for you then go for it.

560 Facebook friends? Do you really want all those people knowing everything you do?

Here's what I said when I "came out" on Facebook (I was already quite out)

That was over 30 months ago
In retrospect I wish I'd said "autism", which I do in all my current statuses, because that was actually what my second diagnosis was and it's what I identify with now.

I did this, nothing really changed. But it made me feel slightly better, so if you think it will for you, you might as well do it. I remember explaining very clearly what Asperger's was, and linking to the Autism UK site, to avoid giving anyone the wrong impression. This page (that's hyperlinked, I thought it would underline to make it obvious, but it hasn't on my machine) might be of use if you're trying to explain what Autism or Asperger's is an easy to understand manner...

(Although I'd never introduce myself right off the bat, as having Asperger's - I'd be too concerned that I get pigeon-holed as autistic and be treated differently as a result, whereas people are unlikely to change how they treat you, if they already 'know' you...)

Yeah, the chances are most won't really read it, or they'll forget pretty quickly.

Many people with ASDs love reading about celebrities who are, were or might be fellow spectrumites. Unless there is a governmental, legal, medical or professional reason to keep quiet about it all, I say congratulations and good luck!

I want to "come out" for several reasons:

1. I want to live an authentic life and not pretend to be something I am not.

2. My closest family and employer already knows.

3. My co-workers already think that I'm weird so why not give them an explanation.

4. I have always been very interested in social justice and minority rights. I have been so vocal about women's rights and gay rights that people have mistakenly assumed that I'm either a woman, gay, or both. Coming out as Autistic fits right into my special interest in social justice causes.

5. The most important reason is to help my two teenage Aspie nephews. They suffer from chronic low self-esteem and they need encouragement and hope. They don't have a father-figure in their lives because their deadbeat dad committed suicide a few years back. They look up to me as the "cool uncle" and I'm the closest thing to a male role-model that they have. If I can help improve their self-esteem - even by just a little - by coming out as a proud and open Autistic then it will be all worth it.

The idea of doing what you are contemplating scares me, frankly, totally utterly and completely s**tless.

My Inner Cynic is jumping up and down, begging me to let it tell you, in bold italicized all caps, not to do it.

I'm not going to let it do that. Because your reasons are (innocent but) commendable and your logic is (optimistic but) sound.

I don't have words to offer you, other than "GOOD LUCK," "GODSPEED," and "MAY ANGELS OF GOD GO WITH YOU."

He/she will be fine, the very worst that can happen, is that he/she discovers which people on their Facebook friends list aren't worth any time or effort, and if anybody's really hateful or bigoted in their response, they can just be unfriended and blocked at the click of a few buttons. Obviously it's hard to ignore people in real life, but I doubt anybody would try anything.

I doubt they'll get any abuse anyway, Facebook don't allow anonymity, so trolling is likely to take place as people can (and probably will) be called out for their crappy behaviour. When I announced it on Facebook, all that happened were a few supportive comments from other people, and somebody else confirmed they had it. I didn't get any abuse off anybody at all...

I came out to my 59 facebook friends a couple months ago, and it went well! That post got some supportive comments and a bunch (by my standards) of likes!

I'm really glad I did it! I feel much more comfortable with being myself when people around me know I'm autistic.


This was the main part of my coming out post:

"Last week, I had an assessment to see if I'm on the autism spectrum. Several things happened a couple years ago to make me suspect that I may be on the spectrum. Realizing that this is a possibility made me take a good long look at how my brain works. This process has let me learn a lot about myself and why I find some things difficult that most other people have no problems with. A lot of things started to make sense and I started realizing that my brain may actually work differently than most other people.

The woman who did my assessment, who specializes in adults on the spectrum, confirmed my suspicions. I got an Autism Spectrum Disorder type 1 diagnosis. I actually feel very relieved to know for sure!

For anyone who disagrees with this, please note that I've spent two years working out how my thought processes work. Reading what people have written about living with autism, it was as if someone had written down my own thought processes. Hell, several of my friends suspected it before I did!

Realizing all of this and finally getting a diagnosis has made me much more comfortable with who I am! I'm trying to figure out a balance between acting "normal" (which is tiring and stressful), and saying "Hey, there are things that I need to do differently so I don't get so stressed out."
I'm still working on figuring things out, but I'm on the right track!"

Once you 'come'out, you can no longer undo it. I recommend that you make a specific group for family and people really close to you so a 'coming out' would not affect your carreer.

What i am saying is, when you post a message on facebook you can change to who it is visible to. You can select between everybody, friends, family, acquintances etc. You can also make your own custom group i believe. Goodluck making a goodlist..

When I did, I just made the status: "Well, it's official. I have "some kind of autism, most likely Asperger's"."

Don't do Facebook so it's a non-issue

I'm on Facebook very little. I see no reason to "disclose." I would only disclose to close friends.

I am me, who just happens to have an ASD.

I have other things, too, like a wife, a car, a life.

I'd find somesort of context to frame it in, as just coming out and saying "I'm autistic" without relation to anything else coming on doesn't seem relevant.