How do you appear more normal in social situations?

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I am hearing people on here talk about appearing or acting more normal in conversations and social situations. But how can I do that by copying people and learning rules? How do I pay attention to people enough to their body and voice, without seeming weird or trying too hard? I don't really want to "cure" my autism though. I'm personally happy with the positive traits it has given me, but sometimes I want to put on a more "normal" face.

I'm not saying I don't act normal in social situations, but I do look very shy because, well, I AM shy. I get all self-conscious, and I feel like extraverted young people are superior to me and I'm just a terribly shy and timid mouse, who just exists at the party. I notice all verbal and non-verbal cues, but have trouble speaking to the people (except for family and close friends/partner) because I just have this intense social anxiety. Even if people seem really nice, I still feel anxious, and I really wish I was like them, but I'm not. Unless I drank alcohol...but I don't like being drunk.