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Berabara
Deinonychus
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20 Nov 2016, 2:19 am

shes really annoying and she is 14 year old because i dont understand her at all shes not smart i go near her she wants to alone 24-7 shes doing it wrong but shes going for weakness thats how i learn social skills door shuts everything she doesnt want talk at all she obsessed with loki and she move away from me i have aspergers :roll: :?: :?: :?: i am frustrated
and she aways gave me odd looks she dont need to be like that shes a bad boy she doesnt treat mum right shes always angry about getting up AND SHE GETS HOME SAME THING it makes me not talk to her i dont know why whats the the problem is


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 142 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

Diagnosis Asperger's Syndrome back in 2005
also have Anxiety Disorder, OCD

Severe to Profound on my left ear and have cochlear implant on Right ear i'm Deaf


Pieplup
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20 Nov 2016, 3:19 am

Berabara wrote:
she move away from me i have aspergers :roll: :?: :?: :?: i am frustrated [/qoute] Please clarify? Do you mean she moved out of the house or just went to another room, to stop talking to you..
Berabara wrote:
and she aways gave me odd looks she dont need to be like that shes a bad boy she doesnt treat mum right shes always angry about getting up AND SHE GETS HOME SAME THING it makes me not talk to her i dont know why whats the the problem is
Maybe you could ask her or analyze what went wrong. Was there any changes, or Not being able to follow routine.. It might be that the volume is overstimulating if she is trying to cover her ears. You might want soundproof walls, Earphones, and/or Sound proof earmuffs. They make a good combination. If she seems irritated by her clothes, you might want to have softer clothes. For example sweat pants instead of jenes or wearing white undershirts. You might also not want to provoke her when she is angry. It's probably a sensory meltdown. Which is basically SPD triggering a Flight or Fight response.


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[color=#0066cc]ever changing evolving and growing
I am pieplup i have level 3 autism and a number of severe mental illnesses. I am rarely active on here anymore.
I run a discord for moderate-severely autistic people if anyone would like to join. You can also contact me on discord @Pieplup


Berabara
Deinonychus
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Location: Warwick Queensland

20 Nov 2016, 4:38 am

Pieplup wrote:
Berabara wrote:
she move away from me i have aspergers :roll: :?: :?: :?: i am frustrated [/qoute] Please clarify? Do you mean she moved out of the house or just went to another room, to stop talking to you..
Berabara wrote:
and she aways gave me odd looks she dont need to be like that shes a bad boy she doesnt treat mum right shes always angry about getting up AND SHE GETS HOME SAME THING it makes me not talk to her i dont know why whats the the problem is
Maybe you could ask her or analyze what went wrong. Was there any changes, or Not being able to follow routine.. It might be that the volume is overstimulating if she is trying to cover her ears. You might want soundproof walls, Earphones, and/or Sound proof earmuffs. They make a good combination. If she seems irritated by her clothes, you might want to have softer clothes. For example sweat pants instead of jenes or wearing white undershirts. You might also not want to provoke her when she is angry. It's probably a sensory meltdown. Which is basically SPD triggering a Flight or Fight response.

she doesnt cover her ears


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 142 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

Diagnosis Asperger's Syndrome back in 2005
also have Anxiety Disorder, OCD

Severe to Profound on my left ear and have cochlear implant on Right ear i'm Deaf


Feralucce
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20 Nov 2016, 5:30 am

THIS might help you... I write a blog to help facilitate Neurotypical/autistic spectrum individual relations...

you can fine it HERE


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Berabara
Deinonychus
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20 Nov 2016, 6:06 am

Feralucce wrote:
THIS might help you... I write a blog to help facilitate Neurotypical/autistic spectrum individual relations...

you can fine it HERE


i have aspergers syndrome


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 142 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

Diagnosis Asperger's Syndrome back in 2005
also have Anxiety Disorder, OCD

Severe to Profound on my left ear and have cochlear implant on Right ear i'm Deaf


Pieplup
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20 Nov 2016, 7:49 am

Berabara wrote:
Feralucce wrote:
THIS might help you... I write a blog to help facilitate Neurotypical/autistic spectrum individual relations...

you can fine it HERE


i have aspergers syndrome
Yes, but since you might not have all the traits, you can see why she's doing it and have more understanding.


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[color=#0066cc]ever changing evolving and growing
I am pieplup i have level 3 autism and a number of severe mental illnesses. I am rarely active on here anymore.
I run a discord for moderate-severely autistic people if anyone would like to join. You can also contact me on discord @Pieplup


SocOfAutism
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20 Nov 2016, 8:02 am

#1: 14-year-olds are going to get on your nerves no matter what. I'm sorry to tell you that, but that's an unfortunate age where they're just realizing a lot of adult thoughts but they still have strong child-like emotions. They have to go through a few years where they figure out how to deal with all that. That's true for both autistic and neurotypical teenagers.

#2: Sometimes autistic siblings have trouble understanding each other/getting along because they are not autistic "in the same ways." Like how you say she's doing it wrong and isn't smart? I've heard my husband and his brother say things like that about each other for years- they're both autistic and both grew up to be strong, self-sufficient, great people (and much more alike than they realize). Their relationship improved greatly once my brother-in-law became an adult and was out of his teens. I'm sure the same will happen for you and your sister, although I know that doesn't help a lot since she's 14 and that's a long way off.

#3: I agree with what others have said, that it's always good to look back and see if something has changed that set her off. Since she's a girl it could have been getting her period or developing in some other way, like gaining weight or growing, getting acne, being stared at by boys, who knows. Or it could have been something that could happen to any of us, like her favorite show ending, or not having access to something else that's important to her, like a book series or type of food. If you don't feel like you could/want to ask her you could ask your parents.



Berabara
Deinonychus
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Location: Warwick Queensland

20 Nov 2016, 8:21 am

SocOfAutism wrote:
#1: 14-year-olds are going to get on your nerves no matter what. I'm sorry to tell you that, but that's an unfortunate age where they're just realizing a lot of adult thoughts but they still have strong child-like emotions. They have to go through a few years where they figure out how to deal with all that. That's true for both autistic and neurotypical teenagers.

#2: Sometimes autistic siblings have trouble understanding each other/getting along because they are not autistic "in the same ways." Like how you say she's doing it wrong and isn't smart? I've heard my husband and his brother say things like that about each other for years- they're both autistic and both grew up to be strong, self-sufficient, great people (and much more alike than they realize). Their relationship improved greatly once my brother-in-law became an adult and was out of his teens. I'm sure the same will happen for you and your sister, although I know that doesn't help a lot since she's 14 and that's a long way off.

#3: I agree with what others have said, that it's always good to look back and see if something has changed that set her off. Since she's a girl it could have been getting her period or developing in some other way, like gaining weight or growing, getting acne, being stared at by boys, who knows. Or it could have been something that could happen to any of us, like her favorite show ending, or not having access to something else that's important to her, like a book series or type of food. If you don't feel like you could/want to ask her you could ask your parents.


well you think i dont have asperger's syndrome but when she look at me it gets really annoying i dont look at it because i learn my own problems thats why im she doesnt understand what im feeling doesnt even care i change my special interest when i grew up its my choice its like im not interested watching tv depends situtation but i have hypersensitive smell taste touch thats all i got and i can smell her shoes very easily in distance it overwhelmes me she don't notices that because i told her take shoes off please because i dont like that smell and then she gets angry about it im like i dont like her because my mum has migrane she doesnt even care about mum because its all about her that what it is selfish part by the way im way smarter than she is but shes frustrating me i have own issues she have her own issues most problem is understanding each other because shes a girl its different i feel different to her makes me feel uncomfortable be around her same as my niece high functioning Autism she understands me because her functioning shes 12 but my youngest sister shes 14 but i know the differents to her im so confused but she is trying be negative reaction to HFA and me and everyone she doesn't shower at all i dont go near her at all because the smell she cant smell her own body but i can smell my own body but it feels like im NT or Aspergers or something like that because im deaf as well makes it even harder for my self i feel stupid


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 142 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

Diagnosis Asperger's Syndrome back in 2005
also have Anxiety Disorder, OCD

Severe to Profound on my left ear and have cochlear implant on Right ear i'm Deaf


kraftiekortie
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20 Nov 2016, 8:39 am

You should keep in mind that she is probably more severely affected than you. You, who might be stronger, should be strong for her, too.

Be the big brother. Try to help her instead of being mad with her.



Berabara
Deinonychus
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Location: Warwick Queensland

20 Nov 2016, 9:46 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
You should keep in mind that she is probably more severely affected than you. You, who might be stronger, should be strong for her, too.

Be the big brother. Try to help her instead of being mad with her.


yeah i can help with that i try to my best i brought her drink from school she doesnt want it so i was sad after that its possible shes more difficult


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 142 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

Diagnosis Asperger's Syndrome back in 2005
also have Anxiety Disorder, OCD

Severe to Profound on my left ear and have cochlear implant on Right ear i'm Deaf


SocOfAutism
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21 Nov 2016, 10:31 am

I understand what you're saying about the stink issue- teenaged girls can smell REALLY bad and somehow when they're related to you the smell can be SO much worse. Especially their feet.

Maybe you need to work on some kind of alternate way of communicating with her. Does she have a phone? Maybe she might be more receptive to you asking her things in a text message instead of spoken out loud.

Maybe with the feet and body odor issue...I'm thinking that IS related to her having hormonal changes and growing and not wanting to deal with it by bathing more, which is what she needs to do. Maybe you could get her a gift basket of different soaps that don't smell offensive to you. That might encourage her to take more time on herself? You could even maybe put some slippers in there that she might like instead of the stinky shoes?

And in general, it might be a good idea to get into the habit of putting the blame on yourself for things, even if it's not your fault. That is a good way to get people to do what you want. Here's an example:

"Hey, I'm sorry, I'm really sick today and I'm very sensitive to smells. I know I haven't been too nice to you lately, but do you think you could put your shoes in your room for awhile? I would really appreciate it."

It doesn't matter whether or not you have actually been nice/not nice to her. Just saying it that way should make her more likely to do what you ask.



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22 Nov 2016, 3:07 am

Berabara wrote:
i have aspergers syndrome

I still believe the series can help you


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CockneyRebel
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22 Nov 2016, 10:17 am

For one thing, coming on an autism forum and saying that you hate an autistic sibling isn't right. For another thing, have you ever asked her why she does the things that she does instead of getting angry at her. Your sister can probably sense that you don't like her and that probably causes her a lot of anxiety. I know, because I have a family member who caused me a great deal of anxiety this year by getting irritated at me instead of asking why I do the things that I do. Your sister might even be scared of you. I know I'm scared of my mum. If you ask her questions about why she does the things that she does instead of expecting her to be more like you, you could find out a lot of interesting things about her that you wouldn't learn, otherwise. I wish my mum would ask me why I do the things that I do. Don't you think it would be worth it, so that your sister could feel loved and wanted by you?


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Berabara
Deinonychus
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22 Nov 2016, 10:47 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
For one thing, coming on an autism forum and saying that you hate an autistic sibling isn't right. For another thing, have you ever asked her why she does the things that she does instead of getting angry at her. Your sister can probably sense that you don't like her and that probably causes her a lot of anxiety. I know, because I have a family member who caused me a great deal of anxiety this year by getting irritated at me instead of asking why I do the things that I do. Your sister might even be scared of you. I know I'm scared of my mum. If you ask her questions about why she does the things that she does instead of expecting her to be more like you, you could find out a lot of interesting things about her that you wouldn't learn, otherwise. I wish my mum would ask me why I do the things that I do. Don't you think it would be worth it, so that your sister could feel loved and wanted by you?



because im deaf as well makes me feel more difficult understanding what she said shes not loud talker at all i just don't like when people talk soft its annoys me so im ignoring her because its deaf thing they usally depends what she said to me all she say negative to me i get frustrated by her so i walk away thats what i do and shes only 14 year old shes really smelly of her shoes she doesnt notices that i can smell distance i can smell someone cooking when my door is shut i can even smell my own room and cars driving pass i can smell pollution in the air it overwhelms me doesn't make me Vomiting so yeah i hate the smell even i can smell her clothes and she doesnt clean her self shes very smelly sorry i cant help it because makes me frustrated i ask her talk shoes off please and she ignored me ignored my mother my mum has sensitive smells not as strong as mine but she gets migrane


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 142 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

Diagnosis Asperger's Syndrome back in 2005
also have Anxiety Disorder, OCD

Severe to Profound on my left ear and have cochlear implant on Right ear i'm Deaf


CockneyRebel
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22 Nov 2016, 11:01 am

Berabara wrote:
CockneyRebel wrote:
For one thing, coming on an autism forum and saying that you hate an autistic sibling isn't right. For another thing, have you ever asked her why she does the things that she does instead of getting angry at her. Your sister can probably sense that you don't like her and that probably causes her a lot of anxiety. I know, because I have a family member who caused me a great deal of anxiety this year by getting irritated at me instead of asking why I do the things that I do. Your sister might even be scared of you. I know I'm scared of my mum. If you ask her questions about why she does the things that she does instead of expecting her to be more like you, you could find out a lot of interesting things about her that you wouldn't learn, otherwise. I wish my mum would ask me why I do the things that I do. Don't you think it would be worth it, so that your sister could feel loved and wanted by you?



because im deaf as well makes me feel more difficult understanding what she said shes not loud talker at all i just don't like when people talk soft its annoys me so im ignoring her because its deaf thing they usally depends what she said to me all she say negative to me i get frustrated by her so i walk away thats what i do and shes only 14 year old shes really smelly of her shoes she doesnt notices that i can smell distance i can smell someone cooking when my door is shut i can even smell my own room and cars driving pass i can smell pollution in the air it overwhelms me doesn't make me Vomiting so yeah i hate the smell even i can smell her clothes and she doesnt clean her self shes very smelly sorry i cant help it because makes me frustrated i ask her talk shoes off please and she ignored me ignored my mother my mum has sensitive smells not as strong as mine but she gets migrane


How about if you typed out the questions on the computer and printed them out for your sister to answer. Do you think that would help?


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Berabara
Deinonychus
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22 Nov 2016, 11:18 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
Berabara wrote:
CockneyRebel wrote:
For one thing, coming on an autism forum and saying that you hate an autistic sibling isn't right. For another thing, have you ever asked her why she does the things that she does instead of getting angry at her. Your sister can probably sense that you don't like her and that probably causes her a lot of anxiety. I know, because I have a family member who caused me a great deal of anxiety this year by getting irritated at me instead of asking why I do the things that I do. Your sister might even be scared of you. I know I'm scared of my mum. If you ask her questions about why she does the things that she does instead of expecting her to be more like you, you could find out a lot of interesting things about her that you wouldn't learn, otherwise. I wish my mum would ask me why I do the things that I do. Don't you think it would be worth it, so that your sister could feel loved and wanted by you?



because im deaf as well makes me feel more difficult understanding what she said shes not loud talker at all i just don't like when people talk soft its annoys me so im ignoring her because its deaf thing they usally depends what she said to me all she say negative to me i get frustrated by her so i walk away thats what i do and shes only 14 year old shes really smelly of her shoes she doesnt notices that i can smell distance i can smell someone cooking when my door is shut i can even smell my own room and cars driving pass i can smell pollution in the air it overwhelms me doesn't make me Vomiting so yeah i hate the smell even i can smell her clothes and she doesnt clean her self shes very smelly sorry i cant help it because makes me frustrated i ask her talk shoes off please and she ignored me ignored my mother my mum has sensitive smells not as strong as mine but she gets migrane


How about if you typed out the questions on the computer and printed them out for your sister to answer. Do you think that would help?

possibly :D do you think i have asperger's syndrome?


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 142 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 87 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

Diagnosis Asperger's Syndrome back in 2005
also have Anxiety Disorder, OCD

Severe to Profound on my left ear and have cochlear implant on Right ear i'm Deaf