PLEASE HELP ME

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I have aspergers and have been suffering from some kind of derealization or something for years. The derealization did lots of damage to a part of me that's really hard to describe but is very fragile. I'm finally starting to feel better and I found a psychotherapist who can help me even further, but I won't be able to see her for several months, and in the meantime I'm going to have to preserve some things that are very fragile.

First of all, for the next several months I'm going have to have a very one track mind about the fact that I going to give her the self-analysis I made of myself and do everything exactly as she says and all my problems will be over. I used to be able to have a one track mind about those things no problem, but something happened do that ability, some that's possibly biological in nature. I know I'm being kind of undreaistic there but I'm really going to need that frame of mind just so I can survive the next couple of months. I'm also going to have to do something about a problem that's really hard to describe but is basically like having your brain undergo a vacuum metastability event

What about keeping a diary/journal?

Just wait till you get some CBT. Nothing is full proof. We are all human, each day is different so we have to just enjoy the adversity. It's all about learning from our 'mistakes' rather than beating ourselves up about them.

ok, but in the meantime I really really want to keep my brain from messing around with things that feel really really fragile.

Immerse yourself in some video game.

"First of all, for the next several months I'm going have to have a very one track mind about the fact that I going to give her the self-analysis I made of myself and do everything exactly as she says and all my problems will be over."

Being obsessed with yourself or how your mind works is not healthy. What about taking walks in nature, or volunteering to help others? Something worthwhile to get outside yourself.

And believing that all your problems will be over if only you do a certain thing a certain way? Not gonna happen. It's far better to take a look at the things that are going right in your life, and approach life by being grateful.

I know I should just look at all the good things, but I really really know what I'm doing. I don't care if it doesn't actually work, it's the placebo effect that counts, and obsessing over how my brain works is just part of who I am. I'm still alot healthier than I was before.

The thing is, I have a very specific plan for what I hope to achieve through CBT, but I need to know how to make it through several months in a state where even the slightest neural oscillations will wreck it. It's a very esoteric situation

This just sounds to me like the most intensive spate of prolonged navel-gazing that I've ever heard of.