Wait a Minute, I'm the One with a Disorder?

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Surf Rider
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10 Feb 2017, 12:45 am

I went to the tennis club at my university tonight, which I've been doing lately. I had this thought, thinking about some of the random undergraduates who were out there on the tennis court with me:

"Let me get this straight. I have two bachelor's degrees, I'm getting paid to get a PhD in physics, I've worked at NASA, I surf and have a host of talents I don't have time to tell you about, I can actually hold an intelligent conversation about most any topic, I'm generally responsible, and I get my work done. You, on the other hand, were too hung over to show up to class this morning to hand in your homework, you're going $40k in debt to get a degree in art history which will be totally useless after you graduate, you can't remember the name of the person you had sex with last night at the fraternity, and the only thing interesting about you is that you like to drink and party with your friends. And you're telling me that your behavior is normal and I'm the one with the disorder?"

Those are some really messed up societal values. The irresponsible reckless partying behavior is worthless at best and destructive at worst, and that's considered "normal"? While my failure to accurately read between the lines when someone made an ambiguous statement to me is a "disorder"? That seems really messed up to me.


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Last edited by Surf Rider on 10 Feb 2017, 1:26 am, edited 3 times in total.

League_Girl
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10 Feb 2017, 1:00 am

LOL I've felt the same way. I decided I didn't want to be normal if that other behavior is normal. The drugs and drinking and the partying and always having friends around and chit chatting and getting pregnant. Yeah I know the stereotypes so I am aware now this isn't NT behavior and it's just human behavior and a stereotype about NTs and teenagers and being normal.


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iliketrees
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10 Feb 2017, 1:15 am

Oh good, this s**t again :roll:

No, the behaviour you're describing isn't normal. Unless you're just exaggerating and stereotyping people who enjoy parties.



League_Girl
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10 Feb 2017, 1:24 am

iliketrees wrote:
Oh good, this s**t again :roll:

No, the behaviour you're describing isn't normal. Unless you're just exaggerating and stereotyping people who enjoy parties.



I already wrote it was stereotyping I am aware of and this isn't NT behavior, it's human behavior and just a stereotype about NTs and teenagers and being normal. But that was my thinking in my teens about normality so I didn't even want to be normal if this is what it is.


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Surf Rider
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10 Feb 2017, 1:25 am

iliketrees wrote:
Oh good, this s**t again :roll:

No, the behaviour you're describing isn't normal. Unless you're just exaggerating and stereotyping people who enjoy parties.

You won't find "Excessive Partying Disorder" in the DSM-V, so the psychological community does consider the behavior to be normal. Perhaps a little reckless and irresponsible, but normal nonetheless.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 107 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 122 of 200
You seem to have both neurodiverse and neurotypical traits


Last edited by Surf Rider on 10 Feb 2017, 1:30 am, edited 1 time in total.

Surf Rider
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10 Feb 2017, 1:29 am

League_Girl wrote:
iliketrees wrote:
Oh good, this s**t again :roll:

No, the behaviour you're describing isn't normal. Unless you're just exaggerating and stereotyping people who enjoy parties.



I already wrote it was stereotyping I am aware of and this isn't NT behavior, it's human behavior and just a stereotype about NTs and teenagers and being normal. But that was my thinking in my teens about normality so I didn't even want to be normal if this is what it is.


Ummm...have you never seen college students? This is not a stereotype. There are lots of people who really do behave this way. They graduate college with a bunch of debt and a worthless degree and a lot of partying stories. It's actually pretty common.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 107 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 122 of 200
You seem to have both neurodiverse and neurotypical traits


Last edited by Surf Rider on 10 Feb 2017, 1:34 am, edited 1 time in total.

League_Girl
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10 Feb 2017, 1:32 am

Surf Rider wrote:
iliketrees wrote:
Oh good, this s**t again :roll:

No, the behaviour you're describing isn't normal. Unless you're just exaggerating and stereotyping people who enjoy parties.

You won't find "Excessive Partying Disorder" in the DSM-V, so the psychological community does consider the behavior to be normal. Perhaps a little reckless and irresponsible, not normal nonetheless.




How many times have homes been destroyed or left in thousands of dollars of damage from parties?

My youngest brother once threw one while my parents were out of town and right when alcohol was brought over, he calls the cops and there was minor damage and my brother got in trouble somewhat for the party he threw without his parents permission but he mostly got off for handling it responsibly. But it was only that one time thing he did. He didn't throw any others without an adult around but he and his brother always felt the need to have parties but they were always controlled but for me they were out of control because of the noise and them moving stuff and tracking in dirt and messing up my clean floors and being in my personal area.


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iliketrees
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10 Feb 2017, 1:34 am

Surf Rider wrote:
iliketrees wrote:
Oh good, this s**t again :roll:

No, the behaviour you're describing isn't normal. Unless you're just exaggerating and stereotyping people who enjoy parties.

You won't find "Excessive Partying Disorder" in the DSM-V, so the psychological community does consider the behavior to be normal. Perhaps a little reckless and irresponsible, not normal nonetheless.

You have substance use disorders, and impulse control disorders in general. Going out drinking so much it's getting in the way of studying is not normal, that's impairing functioning.



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10 Feb 2017, 5:24 am

Do not know about today, but it was normal behavoir when I went to college. I was looked at as wierd and a person not to be trusted because I was not like that. The ability to "hold your alchohol" was considered one the traits of bieng a real man. Not only at college but in the working world also.


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10 Feb 2017, 10:21 am

I was actually told something was wrong with me because I prioritized academics over socialization. I think this was wrong. If I had been told to choose social activities based on my interests, that would have been reasonable. The counselors didn't think this way, however. I knew I was too uptight about my academic performance, but I should have had the right kind of help. I did well in school, but maybe I could have done even better if I had been given constructive advice on how to be less worried about my grades. Instead, I was put down and given a bunch of useless tests.



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10 Feb 2017, 11:41 am

Yes, it is a disorder because you have difficulty communicating with "normal" people.
It may not be an issue if you can do everything you want to do.

But, there are tons of guys on the Love and Dating forum that complain that they can't get dates, and it is likely that this "disorder" is a big factor in their lack of success.



The Unleasher
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10 Feb 2017, 1:44 pm

I can't imagine living that life. I'm in high school and I haven't actually seen many people like that. I think there is nothing wrong with focusing less on socialisation.


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Dear_one
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10 Feb 2017, 2:33 pm

Everybody knows that inventors are crazy.
Inventors know that everyone is crazy.



sonicallysensitive
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10 Feb 2017, 2:39 pm

Surf Rider wrote:
"Let me get this straight. I have two bachelor's degrees, I'm getting paid to get a PhD in physics, I've worked at NASA, I surf and have a host of talents I don't have time to tell you about, I can actually hold an intelligent conversation about most any topic, I'm generally responsible, and I get my work done. You, on the other hand, were too hung over to show up to class this morning to hand in your homework, you're going $40k in debt to get a degree in art history which will be totally useless after you graduate, you can't remember the name of the person you had sex with last night at the fraternity, and the only thing interesting about you is that you like to drink and party with your friends. And you're telling me that your behavior is normal and I'm the one with the disorder?"


...So if you drink & party you can't have talents/skills/aptitudes?

Quite an assumption on your behalf that someone having a drink the night before means they are uninteresting etc.

For all you know, they may be some of the greatest minds at the university.



Surf Rider wrote:
Those are some really messed up societal values. The irresponsible reckless partying behavior is worthless at best and destructive at worst,
Well, for some it leads to sex. Sex can be good fun.

Seems like they could, in one sense, be the sensible ones...



Surf Rider wrote:
and that's considered "normal"? While my failure to accurately read between the lines when someone made an ambiguous statement to me is a "disorder"? That seems really messed up to me.
I'm sure your diagnosis was granted on more than a failure to infer intention from ambiguity.

Two degrees and a PhD and you struggle to see that parties can be a good way of initiating casual sex?


Your post in general is patronising and filled with superiority complex.



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10 Feb 2017, 2:39 pm

I have been saying for years that I am the «Normal» one;
it's the other 98% of the whole entire world who are the ABNormal ones...!


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10 Feb 2017, 2:53 pm

Parties and other socializing activities like clubs can be very good for networking. I know the guy who was in line to be heir to 47th Street Photo. For some that may be a good way to get a good job.