I've been told by a psychiatrist that she thought I might be on the autism spectrum.
What do I know? What I've read about autism seems consistent for me.
This is late in my adulthood.
Perhaps better late than never or perhaps never.
Not that I haven't tried.
I just keep falling through the cracks.
I think I'm what might be called "high functioning".
I've written a poem I think accurately describes me and my challenges.
I consider myself an "acquired taste":
Ballpark
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Because I understand what you want me to do,
doesn't mean I understand you.
My hearing is normal, so's my I.Q.
I speak the same language, but, that doesn't
mean that what comes out of you and into and out
of me will be what you intend and not just me
pretending;
For me, it's connect the dots without the numbers,
getting lost is easier,
Taking me where I don't want to go is either your
idea of fun or frustration,
It's like getting "dumb" animals to do what "dumb"
animals do like it's some kind of joke and they're
the punchline;
Is it any wonder that it's easier not to want to
deal with people or have them deal with me, we speak
the same language and hear the same words, but arrive
at different destinations;
What does it mean to be "normal"?
I don't know.
But, it doesn't mean that I'm not or that you are.
Sometimes our paths cross and sometimes they don't and
that's okay. It's not necessarily important that they
do, as long as we understand each other, even if we don't
fully;
It's probably annoying to know that I'm not trying to be
difficult and it's not helpful to know that it comes easy
or naturally and all too often;
It's who I am and it's not any easier undone than being you.
I wish this explanation could be clearer and make more sense,
provide you with a guide that bridges the gap from you to me,
helps you see what I see as I see it;
Help to undo the damage before it's done,
Less rain, more sun;
I don't suppose it helps to know that flowers also need the
rain to grow;
And even when I'm getting it horribly wrong, doesn't mean I don't
still care, or need / want you to care for / about me
I do
So even if you're not sure what to make of me or want to,
Keep trying.
mmm (170807)
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If you care to reprint it, you have my permission.
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I've got a warped sense of humor, a pretty decent memory, and (so I've been told) - a way with words.
I try to be easy going.
I'm married. My wife is born, raised Filipina (naturalized US citizen) - Dual citizenship.
I'm multi-ethnic - tracing my roots back to Europe as well as Africa.
I've served in the military - Marine Corps (Sgt, 9 years - Honorable).
I have an Associate's (Science) - Library Technician.
And, I've spent a LOT of time working on / with computers - PC, Windows, Linux, Tech Support 15+ years.
I'm also Type 2 Diabetic.
Miss anything?
07 Aug 2017, 10:23 pm
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