Are Intense Imagery Movements/Daydreaming common in Autism?

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I have Intense Imagery Movements, which might be related to Stereotypic Movement Disorder and possibly Maladaptive Daydreaming (MDD). What that means is that I daydream so intensely that it's like being in a movie - I pace around, jump around, flap my arms, toss my head around, cross my eyes and contort my face, etc. Doing this releases adrenaline and gets my heart pumping really hard. I do it every day and have done so ever since I was a toddler (I'm 28 now). It makes the world around me disappear, and I've been injured many times while doing it. On the upside, it helps me be creative and solve problems, and is so enjoyable that I get very stressed if I can't do it (for example, when I had to live with roommates).

As a child, this behavior was very concerning to my family and relatives who suspected something was "wrong" with me, but it only led to one visit to the pediatrician, who insisted I was fine. My "mind movies" were usually about being an animal, and as I grew into a teenager, I found my place among the Furry Fandom and Otherkin (I still cringe about that), because those people also pretended to be animals and I thought I'd found my community.

I've been watching home movies with my family recently, and they confirm what I remember - I was always doing these (involuntary?) movements when I was excited. There's a video where I'm 10 years old and my family is singing me Happy Birthday while I'm standing behind my cake. While they are singing, I'm tensing my body, wiggling my fingers, tossing my head around, and then I reach out with my arms to "claw" at my cake, like a cat (I don't touch the cake, but I look like I'm about to pounce on it).

Needless to say, this behavior is what got me super bullied in middle school, from ages 9 to 13. I seemed to be unaware that it was socially unacceptable, even though my parents often told me to stop acting like that. Maybe I didn't care what others thought - even though I was being bullied and that caused me to hate myself! Maybe I couldn't control it? I still wonder so much why I allowed myself to continue being "that weird girl" in class and acting like a cat/dog/wolf/whatever every day. I still wiggle my fingers and clench my body when I'm excited in public but usually catch myself doing it in time to stop it.

I don't have an autism diagnosis (yet), but this behavior, along with my motor disabilities when I was younger, are the things that I question the most as being at least neurodivergent. My younger brother is nonverbal autistic and I have two first cousins also on the spectrum. Thanks so much for any insight anyone can provide.

Since this is your third post, welcome to Wrong Planet.

It sounds like your Intense Imagery Movements is your bodies way of venting stress energy. It is good to vent stress so long as you can do it in a socially acceptable manner. Have enough control that you can pick your time and place to vent. I believe there are several Aspies on this board that also display similar behavior.

Most likely it is related to meltdowns and panic attacks.

I am in a similar position of awaiting an assessment.

If i am on the spectrum, then living in a mind of daydream is a feature of being on the spectrum. I use my daydreaming mind in other ways. But yes. I have always daydreamed, and was accused of daydreaming in school several times on school reports. Oops!

When I'm by myself, I do a lot of those things too. If I'm sitting in a chair in public(or at school, during those days)I'll sometimes get very figety, but I'm somehow able to control it to where it's not disturbing to others. Regardless of where I'm at daydream a lot and a lot of times I think about things that are unhealthy for me to think about.

I also have 2 siblings(both older)who have severe autism.

I was very fidgity myself. I still am when nurvous! Haha! Apart from pretending to be a dog and following our pet dog around as a child for hours at a time (Was my idea of playing), I would say that in my mind, at one time, for a year or two when I changed school and moved up to secondary school, I would pretend to be a car in order to block out the experience of walking down the long school corridors which I foumd claustrophobic. This came to an end when I was bullied, and after a fight broke out which ended up as 2 against 1, and my Dad went to see the parents, one toldmy Dad about me pretending to be a car and I had quite a telling off which after already being bullied made me petrified, so I made an extra effort to try to be normal in all I did.

Last edited by Mountain Goat on 09 May 2020, 5:39 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Thank you Jimmy, I'm happy to have found this forum!
I think it could oftentimes be related to stress. Other times I do it because I'm excited, or after watching a movie I really liked, or if I'm listening to really powerful music (like film scores). In all cases, yes, I have to be overwhelmed by something before I start doing it.

I look forward to reading others' experiences on this matter.