Why Aspies (tend to) have it harder in life than NTs?
I woudn't say aspies have it necessarily harder in life than neurotypicals.
Being on the spectrum, most of you have social difficulties and challenges that neurotypicals take for granted. Can't make friends, get bullied a lot, have a hard time finding a job. Those things can be tough. Listen, we all take the things we have for granted. You may be living in a pretty nice home with both parents still around and you never get abused or anything. And some people don't have this. Some people would gladly take what you have, just like you would gladly take what some people have.
Thats why I don't complain too much about my situation because I know that even though I have social skills deficits and wish I wasn't this way, I still have a pretty good life. I live in a pretty good home with both parents who are loving and supporting and money has never been an issue for us. I still have my health, i'm not physically disabled or anything. and I live in one of the greatest countries in the world. I have it pretty good. Just wait until I get out in the real world though. I'll be screwed when mom and dad are no longer around.
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Depends on the individual Aspie-Autistic and the people they must interact with. If you are a small minority of any sort you are at a disadvantage.
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DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity.
Overall, maybe we do... but that doesn't mean that no one else suffers or that the suffering of others is irrelevant.
Also, definitely is spelled with an 'i' before the 't', not an 'a'.
Bear in mind that NTs have loads of problems too. Literally everyone has adversities in their lives. Accepting this fact and moving on to make the most of life is the best approach to happiness.
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Here is some of the problems people with Aspergers have.
Because of social skills difficulties, many on the spectrum are lonely and subject to bullying. In school, your peers may not like you because you act different than other people. Your parents may not understand your disability either. It doesn't get much better when you're older and moved out of the house as living by yourself with very little interaction with other people can get very lonely. As a result, you develop low self-esteem about yourself as you're not doing anything with your life. You may spend a lot of your time on the computer or playing video games. Also a lot of people on the spectrum have trouble finding a job. Some of us may be bright but because of our social skills deficits or just lack of motivation to work, many of us are unemployed. There also appears to be a higher rate of aspies who have never been in a relationship at older ages. Those with Aspergers are more likely to have never had a relationship, never kissed someone, or be a virgin at an older age.
Depression seems to affect a lot of people with autism. Not to mention those with an autism spectrum disorder are also more likely to contemplate or commit suicide than those without it. Especially if you're a male, you live in a low-income family, and/or you're a racial minority. Heres the source
http://www.foxnews.com/health/2013/03/1 ... r-suicide/
In general I feel pretty sure that we have it harder, yes. Some individual ASDers probably have it easier.
In my case, I can't be sure but it looks like I've had it worse. I think I'm more vulnerable to harm from the workplace than NTs are, less able to view people's emotional states, less able to know the right thing to do and say. NTs have better executive function. I keep getting stuck in the detail of things, NTs don't. I've been divorced 3 times, which seems to be above the average failure rate.
Thing is, I count myself as a lucky Aspie. I somehow found the kind of work that would be least harmful to me and stuck with it long enough to make me financially secure, I've never had a meltdown, I somehow found a lot of non-judgemental people and felt very included, I gradually learned about feelings and have become a much more supportive and empathic partner, I don't get as stuck on special interests any more, and I've always been able to live independently. So if I've had it bad, as I believe I have, a lot of ASDers must have had it worse.
Depression seems to affect a lot of people with autism. Not to mention those with an autism spectrum disorder are also more likely to contemplate or commit suicide than those without it. Especially if you're a male, you live in a low-income family, and/or you're a racial minority.
I have not depression (maybe rather someting opposite, also due to special interest). I tend to contemplate, but I do not think that I have suicidal inclinations. I am a male and my family has relatively low income (on the studies I have social scholarship) and I live in small location. My father does not know about my diagnoses, rest of my family appears to not understand my difficulties.
I don't know if NTs have it easier in life, but they have a greater ability to make social connections, network with each other and find help when they need it...and, well to put it bluntly, they are able to use each other as resources. That gives them a definite advantage over people who have difficulty forming social connections.
I see a situation with an analogy that goes something like this.
Imagine a large very aggressive and fast-paced hockey game is going on where the players are the NTs battling each other for points and positions. The ASD component is the child-like kid who, without protective gear or full knowledge of the game, has to go out to sweep the ice at the same time the game is going on.
Of course we have it much harder, not just sometimes in unfortunate circumstances, but ALL the time since birth.
And, when more unfortunate things do happen, we don't often have a network of support, or even a single person who can really understand and support us in a significant way.
I'm not a hockey fan by the way. I just used it as an analogy because it is very aggressive.
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Most of you don't have it as hard as you think you do. Don't get me wrong, you may have it hard but if your only problems is having no friends and poor social skills, then you're not that bad off. Now being 25-30 and living alone, being unemployed, and having no friends or family support is a lot more difficult and yes you probably do have it harder than a lot of people. But you should never assume that people you see have it easier than you do. The people who seem to have it all may be in a bad situation like having abusive parents, abusive family, drug addictions, etc...
Also like I said in earlier posts, we often take things for granted because we don't know what its like to be another person and have their problems. Thats why we often miss things when they're gone because they're no longer there.
NTs definitely have problems too. But being an Aspie can make life harder; that is to say, an Aspie will generally have it harder than an NT with the same life situation. That's because Asperger's affects every part of life. Obviously, it affects social skills, which leads to feelings of isolation and depression. It can also affect ability to keep a job and be successful in life. Then there's the anxiety that many with Asperger's suffer from. Asperger's can just complicate life.
Answer: Absolutely yes. I can't speak for anyone else here, but if my life is any indication then we're in big trouble lol.
Me:
I constantly have stuff racing in my head about doing random things, or having random bits of info constantly coming and going in my head.
In addition to the pointless info, I have all the other info that people generally either miss or dismiss altogether at the forefront of my mind, plaguing me.
I struggle to maintain focus in everything that I do, including drive (I can't drive because I can't focus on it enough to be a safe driver).
I struggle to maintain any jobs, if I can get one.
It takes 2-3 times longer for me to get and keep information that people are telling me, than it does the average person, this leads to more workplace issues.
Just with any one of those things, it makes it almost impossible to function normally, let alone all of them, and this isn't even the tip of the iceberg. These are things that other people don't have to worry about, so yes, definitely, we do indeed have it rougher than others, in terms of actually living life.
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