When things you say don't come out right

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I know what to say and how I'm going to say it, but sometimes I used to get so nervous or be so inattentive that I used the wrong tone.


Once I told my mother to take some Prozac, when she was stressing about something insignificant I had done and getting very depressing, and she called me heartless. I meant it in a "don't take everything so seriously and stress about stupid pointless things" kind of way,

Once I said I had no school and no something else, I forget what, and I was happy about it, and it came out the wrong way and my dad got annoyed and mad at me thinking I meant that I was bored because I had nothing to do and was taking it out on him.

Once when someone at camp said jokingly that they were stupid and lazy I said "Don't worry, I'm stupid and lazy too" and they thought I was being serious but I was jsut joking about my "laziness" and "stupidity" just like she was about hers.

Once another girl who was starting work on the same day I did said "Well here goes nothing", and I said that I wouldn't last long, and she asked "Why?" seeming a bit surprised at my negativity.

When someone asks me, "do you mind if I do this?" and I don't mind I usually respond, "yes" as in "yes, you may" but if my stepdad hears that he thinks I mean, "yes, I mind" and spends some time explaining grammar to me. I still say "yes" meaning "yes, you may" and ask "can I..." instead of "may I..." and most people seem to treat these as interchangeable.

However, more relating to your thread is people taking things out of context. Whether it's the context of the situation or the context of thoughts, if it's not clear to people they will tend to make assumptions, whether correct or, more often than not, incorrect, and will judge what you say based on their own assumptions.

Where they go from there is based on their personal knowledge of you and can lead to practically anywhere: arguments, one person in love while the other isn't, loss of job, depression - all due to miscommunication.

I notice that when we use some expression that we've learned it from others, and when we use it in a situation like this, joking, somehow others take us seriously. I have had this same experience many times during my life. The obverse is also true, I don't get it when someone else may do the same thing and I react literally to them.

This seems to have something to do with our alleged humor difficulties. I don't realize when someone's teasing me, nor do others get it when I try subtle humor. It has always felt bizarre that others can't comprehend joking like this when they do the exact same thing. Something about non-verbal communication skills, I guess.

My humor is always seen when I don't want it to be...

People laugh whenever I'm trying to be serious, and react seriously when I crack a joke...

omgosh, nothing ever comes out right out of my mouth haha, its like i have one thing to say thats in my head, and what comes out my mouth sounds like um yea a dvd skipping over and over again haha. I use to get so frustrated with myself that i would attack myself, now i try to laugh it off more or let it go, if i start to stutter, i know theres no hope of any verbal communication, i just let everybody else talk for me, sad but true haha.

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