accommodation in as?

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please move this to any other forum, as i am very unsure as to true relevance within as-relatedness. however - i think it will at least provide a very useful metaphore for a number of as phenomenons

i came across 'accommodation' as applied here, at the opticien's, could be twenty years ago. i'd increasingly noticed a certain vagueness in my sight, which annoyed me. it occurred to me i noticed it 'most' at the station, evening rather than morning - i.e. could be light & contrast, could be tiredness after day at work away from home.

i have always had excellent service from any opticianary, but this guy was brilliant - had i known then i was v.l.assie, i would have asked him to organize my life -
we were sorting out something about my then just obtained gerrispecs (reading glasses in my lingo) when i remembered the vagueness, was aware the shop was somewhat empty & he might have some time to spare.

so, i presented him with this 'vagueness'. where, when &c&c
& down we went, off the stairs, to their measuring place

first thing that came out was that i seem to have some 120% light-sensitivity
(i always liked that idea, it seemed to suit),
evening eh...?
particularly by railway signage presenting whitelighted-bluelettered contrast eh.....?

we weren't talking in quite those terms, but we were experimenting with different lenses in order to find the exact point where my sight got ... well... misted rather than blurred, still showing perfectly sharp lettering behind this vaguer shade of mist

AND HE SIMPLY LET ME WINGE - i knew it really wasn't worth anybody's time - it was of no practical bother whatsoever..... AND HE LET ME BE still NOT HAPPY....

finally, when switching lenses in rather quickish succession we/i found
I WAS THE PROBLEM - what just had been vague-ish -
within a fraction of a second something happened in the head - call it a truely muscular sort of sliding re-focussing the eye (or sight? is there a difference?) -
was suddenly clear.

and this just happened, nevernoticedbefore: this is called accomodation -
you accomodate the amount of effort it takes to get the correct focus.

obviously that must be a continuous strain, and it might falter when tired,
and of course we have in so reading entered a vicious spiral ...

he simply could not get my perception to sit still as he was taking a pic.
but now we knew how to get there:
i just had to close my eyes and relax in my head as best i could, before
looking through the next lens/es and then
[[osodesperately]] try not to adapt, not to try, stay relaxed dontpanic dontpanic...
& we got there

point is:
must be (possibly) AS-related as it has at least something to do with high-sensitivity;
but i find the extended concept of accommodation very useful

when reading so many posts about people SUCCEEDING to fit in, by adapting (they say) they make it sound as if it was a conscious decision to adapt, and i have found - with all due respect so i'll just say in my case - that is simply not true - i have adapted before i know it & i think the word accomodated better suits the body

in the mere context of eyesight & perception, i believe my dazzling successes in ocupulating the spinning lady also show this physical effort can be controlled & trained to do so

there are more examples, but they might not add anything

a late as-asylum seeker [GOSH HOW COULD I POSSIBLY HAVE KNOWN], do no longer look what they done to my song ma, look what i've done to my self ma; i've taken myself & turned me up-side down my mama, look what i've done to myself...

i've accommodated, bentoverbloodybackwards, givenwiththewind
and didn't know, never knew & and that is my only problem with as -
had the psychiatrist and two psychotherapists and other professionals where&when i more or less had myself institutionalized for three months just twenty years ago...;
had they only told me - i would have coped,
easily in fact, with a little help from many an informed 'friend'

too bloody good at being my chameleonic SELF & from here just around WP & only at times of a/be/mused ironic self-awareness of moronic but deserved self-pity -
do i allow myself to feel like the targeted&innocent survivor of a suicide attack

with Shelley Long as Truddi Chase
2 4 6 8
i say no more shall i accommodate