Embarrassed about things you have said/done in the past?

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Are you embarrassed about your past?
Yes, I am and it bothers me. 70%  70%  [ 30 ]
Yes, I am but it doesn't bother me that much. 26%  26%  [ 11 ]
No, not really. 5%  5%  [ 2 ]
Total votes : 43

JWRed
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21 Apr 2008, 12:33 pm

Since I was diagnosed a few years ago, I have thought about all the strange and weird things I have done in my past. I am embarrassed. Does anyone else feel this way?



LeKiwi
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21 Apr 2008, 12:44 pm

I remember things I did when I was about four that probably would have been forgetten within five minutes by all else involved, yet I still remember the shame and confusion of 'getting it wrong'. I look back in hindsight and think "What was I thinking?"... but no point in regrets is there, that's just how we learn!

So yeap, I look back and get embarassed, but it's just me and I accept that. So I don't really worry. :)


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Social_Fantom
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21 Apr 2008, 12:46 pm

I have said many things things that I wished I hadn't as soon as I said them. A lot of it as from the lack of empathy that comes with AS. Even to this day I say some things I regret and I post things I wish I hadn't on this site as well.


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Willard
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21 Apr 2008, 12:50 pm

:roll: I am still occasionally haunted by things I said on the radio nearly thirty years ago, that I thought at the time were cool and witty, only to realize later that I'd made an utter fool of myself, misquoting or misidentifying. One of my mentors pointed out that once it was said into the mic, it was immediately hurtling off the edge of the earth at 186,000 mph, and couldn't be recalled. Truth is, no matter how egregious the faux pas, humans generally have very short memories for inconsequential things like that. Don't overestimate the weight your verbal boo-boos carry in other people's minds. (they might get the general impression that you're odd, but odd is always better than mind-numbingly common).They're more concerned with their own issues, than your gaff. Unless of course you've directly and intentionally hurt or insulted them.



JWRed
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21 Apr 2008, 12:54 pm

I did some unforggetably embarrassing things in front of people. None of the things would have any type of material impact on their lives though.



Lightning88
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21 Apr 2008, 1:34 pm

I think we all are. It happens to all of us at least one point in our lives. I'm lucky nothing extremely embarrassing has happened to me, but there's always those little things...



REM
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21 Apr 2008, 1:35 pm

Probably will tomorrow, but right now no.



Tim_Tex
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21 Apr 2008, 1:52 pm

I voted for the second option.


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AlteredEgo
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21 Apr 2008, 2:02 pm

JWRed wrote:
Since I was diagnosed a few years ago, I have thought about all the strange and weird things I have done in my past. I am embarrassed. Does anyone else feel this way?


Yes, quite often actually.

As a small example, I once said this to my Mom about Heather Locklear - "Why does she look younger than you and you're older than her?"
My Mom was really upset about it and I couldn't figure out why.
I was probably about 13 or 14.
Since then I've realized how that could have come across, in fact, I can definitely see.
I shake my head every time I think about it now...



Kaleido
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21 Apr 2008, 2:42 pm

JWRed wrote:
Since I was diagnosed a few years ago, I have thought about all the strange and weird things I have done in my past. I am embarrassed. Does anyone else feel this way?

Me too.

I did say some strange things in my twenties which I still remember to this day. :oops:

My diagnostician for my re-assessment was very kind and she enabled me to look on myself with forgiveness and to accept that some of my mistakes were due to my AS. She wasn't encouraging me to hide behind it or make excuses for myself but to forgive myself for the genuine poor choices I made.

When I looked back and saw how my life had been because of my AS, I felt I had been cheated of a normal and fulfilling life. I felt sorrow, embarrassment, failure, loss and other things but the ability to forgive myself came later.

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Reodor_Felgen
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21 Apr 2008, 2:50 pm

Some of the embarassing things I've done in the past still bothers me. In any case, it's to private to mention here.



anbuend
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21 Apr 2008, 3:26 pm

I voted for yes but it doesn't bother me much, but I mean "doesn't bother me much anymore" more than anything.

I've done a lot of embarrassing things before, but after having them brought up (in whatever form) and used against me, I've become rather immune to the parts I hadn't already gotten over.


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21 Apr 2008, 3:45 pm

There are things I have done in the past but I am not sure if it is AS related or not. I have never talked about them, nor ever will. But there was something I told my online friend about but he was the only one, the rest I never told because I felt stupid and don't want anyone else to ever know.

None of this stuff bothers me anymore. I just look back and know lesson learned, I won't ever make that same mistake again. I was a kid then and I don't do that anymore do I.



Lurv
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21 Apr 2008, 4:11 pm

I've said some things that makes me hope the people who heard it has a poor memory.



Jeyradan
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21 Apr 2008, 4:27 pm

I've said some things I hope people can forget. I've said some things that I know they've forgotten, but still make me squirm.
Some of them are hurtful or just plain unwise, but a lot of them are just things that got me told off or laughed at or in some way diminished, and I remember them and they hurt me. Not necessarily anyone else. They all still bother me, though.



GlassWall
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21 Apr 2008, 11:14 pm

Social_Fantom wrote:
I have said many things things that I wished I hadn't as soon as I said them. A lot of it as from the lack of empathy that comes with AS. Even to this day I say some things I regret and I post things I wish I hadn't on this site as well.


ya, that's a large chunk of my regret also.

i have done a lot of things that i find embarrassing that make me feel the same way but doing something that i later realize hurt someone makes me feel awful and i will beat myself up for it for a long time afterward, sometimes for weeks.

i once told my boyfriend during a discussion about politics that his conclusion was irrelevant because he used faulty logic - which he had but that's beside the point. he never forgave me for that and i didn't blame him one bit.

that was the day i realized that being right isn't always worth it, especially in a relationship. alas i learned it too late.