Old pine dances (renga)

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Joined: 4 Jul 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,892
Location: 1134

02 Dec 2005, 3:35 pm

Old pine dances
wind singing swift and low:
rain changes to snow.

Note: English commends itself/poorly to japanese meter:/adjustments were made

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Raised by Wolves

if you are going through hell, keep going.
Winston Churchill

ridgerider
Deinonychus

Joined: 10 Nov 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 303
Location: outside looking in

03 Dec 2005, 9:40 am

grandfather boughs under snow
falling to the ground beneath

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"The voyage of discovery lies not in finding new landscapes but in having new eyes." - Marcel Proust

Joined: 4 Jul 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,892
Location: 1134

03 Dec 2005, 9:24 pm

grandfathers I'll never know
merchant marine, chef de cuisine
wonder if they liked snow?

_________________
Raised by Wolves

if you are going through hell, keep going.
Winston Churchill

ridgerider
Deinonychus

Joined: 10 Nov 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 303
Location: outside looking in

04 Dec 2005, 4:46 pm

all the grandfathers are gone
even their tracks have melted

_________________
"The voyage of discovery lies not in finding new landscapes but in having new eyes." - Marcel Proust

Joined: 4 Jul 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,892
Location: 1134

05 Dec 2005, 4:34 pm

summer's memory:
dessert white as fallen snow:
melting ice cream

_________________
Raised by Wolves

if you are going through hell, keep going.
Winston Churchill

ridgerider
Deinonychus

Joined: 10 Nov 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 303
Location: outside looking in

06 Dec 2005, 11:13 pm

ice cream dripped on white sand
beach in the simmering past

_________________
"The voyage of discovery lies not in finding new landscapes but in having new eyes." - Marcel Proust

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