Looking For a Specialist in Delaware

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I don't know if I posted this in the right forum, but I'm a 22 year old woman with undiagnosed Asperger's(I'll get to that story in a moment). I just got approved for Medicaid and I'm looking for a specialist to see to diagnose and treat my AS. Does anyone know of a doctor in my area who specializes in Autism/AS?

The reason I'm undiagnosed: When I was young, my pediatrician noted signs of AS. I had awful meltdowns(I broke 3 bedroom doors during several-hour marathon meltdowns), bad social skills, trouble with eye contact, etc. But for whatever reason, my mom decided not to let the doctor diagnose me. I was a little upset to find this out a year ago after doing my own research(because a therapist suggested I was probably on the spectrum) and realizing I have AS, so I didn't bother asking exactly why she chose not to let them diagnose me correctly. She told me that both my pediatrician and psychiatrist suggested the diagnosis, but rather proudly said she hadn't let them. Which kind of hurt, like she didn't want to have an Autistic kid.

Welcome to WP!

Yes, I think a lot of parents can react a bit like that. I think that NT's often can't see the good parts about being AS, because their minds work so differently to ours, just like we often find it hard to understand the good parts about the things NT's enjoy doing. I'm sure your mother thought she was expressing her love and confidence in you by refusing your diagnosis.

I'm not sure where in Delaware you are. We're such a big state ! !! I have some phone #'s for you. First is Sheryl Winsby, my psychologist, and she is in Milford. Her # is 422-3113 (office). Dixie at the desk will help you get in touch with Sheryl as I don't want to give out her private #s. She diagnosed me with AS and Tourette, and , tho it was all rather new to her at the time, she has studied AS a lot over the past year.
Also, in the Wilmington area is a girl I know only as Heidi who is in charge of a Asperger group up there. I'm at the oppoite end of DE, at the beach, so I never got up there for their meetings. Her # is (was) 472-2638. Hope this helps. My # is 249-9985 if you need someone to talk to.

tourettebassist:
I actually live just south of Milford, in Lincoln, so Milford is great! And Dr. Winsby accepts the MCO for Medicaid I was thinking of going with(because it has self-referral), so that is definitely who I'll be calling! Thank you! I'm limited to 20 visits per fiscal year on Medicaid, but that's still almost every other week, which should be fine. Plus I think there are other programs out there to help with psychology visits and things(my mom works for DHSS, I'll ask her). Thank you!

sunshower:
That probably is how she was thinking. I love my mom, and I'm not mad at her about it really, because there's nothing I can do to change it anyway. I think a lot of it was that she was the hard working overachiever in her family. The first to go to college and graduate, the first to have a successful career, etc. Thinking I was NT for 21 years made me who I am today, for better or worse.

*sigh* Yes, my mom had that same refusal to let me be diagnosed. It caused trouble for me, too. By all means, mention to your doctor your mother's opinion and why you weren't diagnosed as a child--it would serve to explain why you had hours-long meltdowns, etc., and still weren't diagnosed.

I don't know that thinking you were NT had much to do with it. You simply found out where your skills were and used them. Anybody can do that, NT or otherwise. Although there is a very worrying tendency to overprotect and underestimate children with diagnoses, this tendency only causes problems if the child internalizes others' assumptions of his incompetence.

Perhaps that is not her reasoning at all. Your mother may have done something very heroic out of immense love for you. Maybe she was against a diagnosis and treatment because she loved you so much just the way you were and didn't want the medical profession to mess you up. They are quite capable of that you know. I refused to let the school psychologist interfere with my son's beautiful mind and personality traits. I saw no benefit from singling him out and putting a label on him. They (the teacher and school psychologist) did it behind my back and lured my son into their special little room with something he found hard to resist: the opportunity to play video games for an hour instead of sitting in a boring classroom. He was a very intelligent kid and he was playing them for all they were worth. I only found out when my son told me about the video games he was playing. Then I called up the school and gave them a piece of my mind. I also refused to let the school give my children fluoride tablets when they were pushing that stuff hard onto the children of "certain" neighborhoods. Children can get extra help if they need it without putting a label on them. And please don't interpret this as my thinking that AS is something to be ashamed of. I just hate labels because of the rigid expectations and ignorant treatment that come along with them.

But, anyway, Welcome to Wrong Planet. Yes, sometimes and for some people a diagnosis can make life easier and bring along help and understanding that wouldn't otherwise be available. But just for good measure, remember, it's a piece of paper that can open some doors and close others. It is not a be-all end-all.

Please tell Sheryl I miss her. I should e-mail her and tell her how I am but it's an aspie thing that keeps me from doing it. I was divorced and lost my insurance so I couldn't see her anymore. She is a wonderful person to sit and talk with. I know you will like her. I am now very aware of my condition. As I said you call call if you need another Aspie to talk to.