Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, but so much snow falls that your house is crushed under the weight.

I wish have all the books that where in the famous library of Alexander.

granted, you have all the books. they are in the condition of a typical surviving book from that era.

i wish that my black pants were a very slightly darker shade of black.

Granted, but they soon become worn and are unusable.

I wish I could meet Ellen DeGeneres.

Granted, but you have the flu and she catches it.

I wish I never had to go to sleep and instead could just go to sleep and wake up when I wanted to.

granted. you wake up in a round fish tank, with no way out. every time.


i wish i could mount every .img file i download successfully.

Granted, but every time you download an image you download a virus which will either delete all of your files or ban 5,000 WP members at random, including possibly yourself (you have to decide).

I wish my wobbly tooth would come out.

Granted and your wobbly eye came out as well.

I wish to have company tonight...just for a couple of hours.

Granted. Your "company" are a bunch of drunk thieves who steal all your valuables.

I wish WP didn't slow my browser down.

Granted, in fact every atom of your body has protons consisting of 3 quarks, so you are the proud owner of an extremely high number of quarks. Unfortunately the gluons became so jealous of them when they heard your wish, that they decided to leave. Good luck with that!

I wish there were a infinite number of quests and ranks in Fantasy Life.

granted. the quests are created via a shoddy RNG that half of the time, creates incoherent messes not possible to complete. but, the permutations are many.

i wish i existed.

Granted, your gluons return. However, they require you to thank each and every one of them for doing so. Daily.

I wish I could build a snowman that came alive.

Granted. He's similar to Marshmallow from Frozen.

I wish there were no trolls or spammers or bullies on WP. Just nice members.

granted. the definition of nice is narrowed town to an incredibly narrow and unrealistic ideal that none of us mere humans can hope to attain.

the site is barren.

i wish that deities spawned from the heads of gods and those spawned from one of the metaphorical arms of gods, can have cosmic nerve cells linking the two that are able to be plucked from timespace.

Granted, but their lifespan ranges from 24 hours to 5 days.

I wish I had a pet goldfish in a bowl.

Granted. It is in a kiddie cereal bowl.

I wish gravity hadn't existed.