Corrupt A Wish

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Granted! But its all irrational

I wish I could have



and wear it on top of my neoprene shirt. and have all the locks locked and eat the key so no one can bother me to take off my neoprene or my PVC!

I also want the pants and gloves! with locks on those too, so no one can ever bother me to take off my comfortable clothing, and only I have the key.

Very well citizen, Now report to R&D and go test some weaponary that is 100% safe*.
(*Pssshh, more like 0% safe.)

I wish I could repaint my room.

Granted! its gray

I wish I could have



and wear it on top of my neoprene shirt. and have all the locks locked and eat the key so no one can bother me to take off my neoprene or my PVC!

I also want the pants and gloves! with locks on those too, so no one can ever bother me to take off my comfortable clothing, and only I have the key.

(repeating wish as the above grant was not directed for me)

Granted. I wonder how you're going to relieve yourself from now on.

I wish Henry David Thoreau came back to life.

Granted! but he is not what you thought to be

I wish the pants locked on me at the waist but had two zippers to allow me to handle my "duties"

Granted, but the zipper designer was an idiot, and gave you a very small zipper set to deal with, the kind that jams and sticks.

I wish I had a power suit that was lava and water proof.

Granted, but the game you got them on is your least favorite.

I wish my PI would be clear.

Granted but PI means Private Illis

I wish i could be wrapped up in a giant sheet of smoothskin neoprene head to toe in 10 layers. and the ends sealed off and laid out in the hot sun! (like my shirt... smooth soft and sticky rubbery)

wish granted and can only have it once and 5 seconds later you need to urinate and have to get unwrapped...

i wish for the ability to hold a conversation

Granted! but you hold a conversation with neoprene

I wish i could be wrapped up in a giant sheet of smoothskin neoprene head to toe in 10 layers. and the ends sealed off and laid out in the hot sun! (like my shirt... smooth soft and sticky rubbery) AND NEVER HAVE TO URINATE OR POOP AGAIN!

granted but you're in the sand at the beach and the tide has now drifted you into the ocean xD

i wish for yellow ducky pajamas

Granted! They are made out of latex! hope you like tight warm and sweaty and sticky

I wish i could have the above said pajamas

lol...Granted! you can have mine! but they're now full of my sweat and you're not allowed to wash them =p

i wish a dinosaur would stomp on Britney Spears!

i lurve the smell of sweat most of the time

Granted! but you also get squished. thankfully you live by the miracle of being pounded into a deep mud pit. but now you are stuck in there.

I wish i could have loads of sweaty neoprene wetsuits that i could pull over my head and smell the warm humid inside and that nice smothering feeling

Granted. You exhaust the world's supply of neoprene. Scuba divers from all over the world gather in front of your house with unfriendly intentions.

I wish to grow hair on my chest -- UP TO an aesthetically pleasant degree.