Corrupt A Wish

Post Reply New Topic

Granted. Your computer will stop generating errors, and work just "fine"... for the next 37 nanoseconds.




I wish that I had all of the time in the world. Would I share any with others? That truly is a question for the ages...

Granted; all the time in the world is yours... but the bad ones only. The good ones go to others.

I wish I could adjust my sleeping patterns in an instant and whenever I please.

Granted. Sadly, you become addicted to this ability, and switch sleep on in order to escape unpleasant situations. This means that you never resolve conflict with others, and if you're driving and you see a crash about to happen, rather than apply the breaks you sleep through the ensuing horror...

By the way... this year I got a real wish granted, and it was corrupted. This stuff happens!

Okay... I wish I was physically perfect in every way.

Granted. You are physically perfect in every manner. However, you mental ability regresses to that of a two-year-old.



I wish that I could control semiconductors with my mind.

Granted! But they start controlling you and tell your brain to address 0xf00d every 30 minutes till you explode from eating 0xf00d

I wish for 100 wide leather belts

_________________
check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

Granted; you can walk through all walls successfully. Though on your first attempt, it's an outside wall of a skyscraper. An even worse than that, you land in DaWalkers lap



I wish the internet were real

You want the internet to be more real. It has become more real, but you will not like it. It is real but the problem is that I FTP my way into your house, eat all the food in your fridge then telnet my way home. Also the goblins in the fairy tales on a children's story web site also work out how to FTP into your house, the problem with them is that they do not want to go home. I hope you like your new house guests.

I wish that I was all knowing.

_________________
Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

You now know everything, including how to fix the world's sufferings and woe. However, you also know that humans are a dirty, greedy little species that brings our suffering and woe upon ourselves, and you know how much work and effort on your part will be required to fix everything for the rest of us. You know humans don't really deserve your help. The whole thing depresses you, and since you know how to make yourself not be all knowing again, you give up in disgust and go back to being ignorant.

I wish I had a computer capable of running Fallen Earth.

Granted, but it isn't capable of running ANY other game.

I wish I had Godzilla as a pet.

Granted; but his snoring sets off the smoke detecters and they must be diabled. After that he grows up to be a happy dino, then when puberty hits, he burns the house down while sexting with your mother-in-law.


I wish for everyone to have a nice weekend

Granted. Everyone will have a nice weekend, save for you. The weekend will be your worst day in your life.

I wish I get cured of my sickness right now.

Granted, yet you aquire another illness (nothing bad)that makes you wish for the first.
I wish to understand people better.

Granted. You will understand people better, but people will have a harder time understanding you.

I wish for more money.

you get more money, the only problem is that it is forged money mixed in with slightly burnt bank notes from when the safe crackers blew up a bank safe. You get arrested and sent to jail for 30 years, you keep saying that you have no idea where the cash came from. The cops and the judge keep saying that you are covering for the crooks and they keep uping the jail time.

I wish for a bee hive where the bees make lemon curd jam rather than honey.

_________________
Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

Granted. The bees will make lemon curd jam. Stale lemon curd jam with maggots in it. Nice.

I wish I am incorruptible, invincible, and infallible.