Corrupt A Wish

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Granted! But everyone gets pissed off, gets your address and kills you. you are now dead.

listen to the following MP3.

http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyc ... e_Dead.mp3

I wish for more money ot cover my strap expenses :p

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When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

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CLASSIC AUTISM

Granted, but robbing a bank really wasn't a good idea! You've exchanged your straps for stripes now

I wish I was 200 years younger.

GRANTED! You are now 2 years old.

I wish Survivor and American Idol can go away.

What a worthy wish! They have both been made to go away. They are now both being screened in one room simultaneously on two televisions. Not sure how you ended up locked in the same room though.

I wish Walker, Texas Ranger would be banned from the Television.

Granted, but only in Texas. Great job breaking it.

I wish for a Canadian Invasion of the USA.

GRANTED! Now Canada is known as North Montana.

I wish Fox News can go away.

Granted. The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, CNNNN, and other fake news take its place instead.

I wish I have a better day today.

Granted. But it was the other you in a parallel universe that had a better day.

I wish I had a beautiful, intelligent 30-year old girlfriend who doesn't smoke or do drugs or drink alcohol, is disease free and never cheats on me...

Granted. ...She's kind of a vampire, though.

I wish that I could charge lithium-ion batteries by touching them with my fingernails.

Granted. You can also shock yourself in the process, electrically.

I wish I could fall to the ground, and be distracted at a critical moment so I could gain flight.

Granted, but you're being stalked by some fellow named Agrajag.

I wish that I could make anything fact by stating it to be so.

Granted. But one day you say "I feel like crap today" and then...

I wish I had a time machine so I could go back in time and assassinate everyone that invented "reality" shows before they made it to the TV studio.

Granted, but some of them were your ancestors, so you would never be born.

I wish for a cup of coffee to quick me up and make me very active.

GRANTED! You are served cold coffee and it tastes terrible.

I wish for a cup of tea.

Granted, a cup of something that rhymes with tea.



I wish my stepfather and my mother weren't manipulative power and control freaks and that they shall stop poisoning my sister against me and my girlfriend.

Denied! Bwahhahaha!