question for people who lived in and abusive home as a kid.

Post Reply New Topic

If you stay too long, you' ll lose the esteem you need to move out. I kept VERY busy and only came home to sleep. I didn't sleep too many hours either. When I was old enough to work, I did it incessantly in order to get the capital to move out into a small apartment. I attended a local community college, took a long time to get an A.A. degree but it got me a better job and I had to just work at this one full-time job instead of several part-time ones like before. If one parent isn't so bad, you may be able to pull off college. But after graduation, run like hell!!
Break off all ties because abusers get worse with age and then go after your poor children in memory of you. I wish I had broken off family ties 10 years sooner than I did because they took terrible advantage of my husband and kids and I stood there like a fool and let it happen. It makes me sick to think about that. Those creeps are old now and I've been told I'll be getting nothing from their will. I say, "Thank goodness and good riddance."

I don't think I was abused (at least not physically), but I will say that my Dad is a complete a**hole who doesn't deserve to live.

Anyway, I hope to move out soon once I turn 18 (next year).

And for all the people who were abused whether currently or in the past, my hat goes off to you people. It pisses me off when I see pathetic excuses for human beings abusing their child(ren). It goes to show how cowardly they are, beating up someone less than half their age...

I was extremely lucky. My parents sued a place on my behalf when I was 12. I had about 15k, and they couldn't touch it. When I turned 18, I had access to the account. I first left and went with my aunt, but they are also abusive. I ended up in a group home. Currently, I live with my husband and his abusive family, but it's better than what I had. I'm counting the days until I can move out. I would seriously consider a group home and applying for SSI if you can't work. I understand why it's so hard for people to leave. A lot of abusers keep you financially dependent. Try your hardest to get some sort of income. There are also shelters you can go to.

I will be honest. If I didn't have that money, I would probably still be there today. I didn't have friends or family. I had absolutely NO support. If you ever can, you should try to buy something like a trailer. I always said if something horrible goes wrong, I'd try to get one. At least you'd have a roof over your head. Then I would purposely move to a place where they can't kick you off of welfare for not having a job even if you are looking. And I would plan my next move.

how are you doing with this situation? would like an update. want to be here to support you so you don't have to make the decisions i did thirty years ago.

i had dreadful nightmares about my mother trying to kill me from as early as i can remember. and yes i used to minimize how bad it was too. it's a normal response to an abnormal situation.

there are a lot of domestic violence resources out there, even just calling their toll free numbers (from a safe phone) and talking to someone can be very helpful, i've done it.

national domestic violence hotline (US) is: 1−800−799−SAFE(7233) (and there are more)

how are you doing with this situation? would like an update. want to be here to support you so you don't have to make the decisions i did thirty years ago.

i had dreadful nightmares about my mother trying to kill me from as early as i can remember. and yes i used to minimize how bad it was too. it's a normal response to an abnormal situation.

there are a lot of domestic violence resources out there, even just calling their toll free numbers (from a safe phone) and talking to someone can be very helpful, i've done it.

national domestic violence hotline (US) is: 1−800−799−SAFE(7233) (and there are more)

I did not get out until I went off to college. I'd rather not share stories because it's depressing, and I'm trying my best to stay upbeat and positive. My best advice is to work hard so that you can leave the house ASAP. Once you leave, you have the freedom to grow and explore.

My dad was the abusive one, and I don't talk to him at all. I last saw him at a wedding, and I ignored him. Him just being around just brings up too much negative feelings and memories.

Alright, I'm out! Starting to feel depressed already!

I did this twice. Once at age 15 and the final at age 19. Didn't even realize how bad I had it there.
But I'm past this and well into the "forgiveness" stage now. (I guess at 70 I must be a late "bloomer?":)

denny